Getting sucked into stage Orange

[Siggi]

I've just realised that i've been wondering in the forrest of spiral stage Orange for a bit. It's so free'ing to realise it and letting it go haha. I've been focusing soooo much on materialistic things like planning on becoming financially independent (which is not bad), looking good, fashion, hair cuts and just looking good in general, being better than my friends in everything, outsmarting them and etc. Taking part in this rat race and being a better rat than others in simple terms haha. Just glad to be out of it <3 

This is probably an ego defence or backlash of some sort... I lost my sister 3 months ago and had to stop my college degree because of that event. I've just been trying to make me feel better by feeding my ego all kinds of stuff in attempt to get my mood away from all that grieving, sadness and depression.

An example of this is I was planning on making one of my life goals to own a Rolex watch  like that would mean I am finally financially independent and made it to that stage... Had a fantasy of my friends envying me while I wore a COOGI sweater with a Rollie on my wrist. Get outta here Siggi!

One thing that I understand more after her passing is that I know how villains or monsters get created. When you are filled with such STRONG and negative emotions like I got and you're not dealing with them and you just live in them for a long  period of time, no wonder you want everything to burn or be destroyed.  

Hope those of you that read this take an extra moment to look if there is some external stuff that are making you behave different and feel bad.

Important to stay on your toes. Thank you Leo for making me the person I am today, has made everything less hard the last couple of weeks. 

[Recursoinominado]

Well, there isn't a problem really, it will give you a solid base for advanced stages.

Personally, i suck with self-discipline, work ethic and financial independence and this is a bottleneck in my self-development.

I found myself approaching enlightenment and losing most of my materialist motivation, which has been my sole focus the last couple years, i have to brainwash myself to want money lol

[Preety_India]

You're right about one thing - villains and monsters get created. 

 

[Siggi]

@Recursoinominado Problem being dealt with  This post was more of a sharing my experience.

I recommend Stephan Graham for finances on youtube, I kinda felt in the beginning he was a weasel but he's very good at making you aware of your finances and interesting to watch. 

 

 

[juvoci]

@Siggi

One cool thing about climbing the ladder to higher stages is that, once you're more conscious and can see the bigger picture, you can still engage in "materialistic" activities; but now you're engaging with more wisdom.

For example, even at Stage Turquoise, you can still build a business, you can still create "human" value and revenue, you can still purchase nice things. But now that you're wiser, you'll create a more enlightened business; you won't feel guilty about your success; you'll treat those nice things with more respect, you'll share them with people instead of hoarding them, you'll be able to let go of them easier if they break or get stolen.

In short, the higher stages don't necessarily forget about the lower stages. Instead, they take the best of each stage and combine them to create a holistic being.

=]  <3

Edited December 11, 2020 by juvoci

[Siggi]

@juvoci Agree but I was getting sucked into that rat race. Started to focus only on the cheese. Wishing for people to envy me. Getting crumbled by the toxicity  that the stage Orange can bring to a person. 

What a relieve to be out of it. 

Funny also how you can get lost in things and just a bit of self journaling clears everything up for you. 

[juvoci]

@Siggi

True.

=]  <3