The argh journal

[Blackhawk]

Warning for not so nice stuff. Don't read if you are sensitive to such stuff.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Life is the worst thing in existence. Tables have no problems, lives do.

Everyone is full of shit, and no one understands me.

[Blackhawk]

Angels and similar stuff clearly don't exist. And Reality isn't Love. I've pretty much proved that.

Edited December 7, 2020 by Blackhawk

[Blackhawk]

How little life force can someone have but still be alive? I must be the first real zombie. I'm done with life. (But I'm not suicidal.)

[Blackhawk]

A woman who is below average in everything has no problem whatsoever with finding a boyfriend. While a man at the same level wont even be able to touch a woman. This is so painfully obvious that anyone who denies this.. I don't know, there must be something weird going on in that person's head. At least this is the case in the country which I live in.

Edited December 8, 2020 by Blackhawk

[Blackhawk]

Wow, I've found some nice quotes by Emil M. Cioran. They totally resonate with me. I have had almost the same thoughts.

Quote

If I were to be totally sincere, I would say that I do not know why I live and why I do not stop living. The answer probably lies in the irrational character of life which maintains itself without reason.

Quote

How important can it be that I suffer and think? My presence in this world will disturb a few tranquil lives and will unsettle the unconscious and pleasant naiveté of others. Although I feel that my tragedy is the greatest in history—greater than the fall of empires—I am nevertheless aware of my total insignificance. I am absolutely persuaded that I am nothing in this universe; yet I feel that mine is the only real existence.

Quote

Nothing is better proof of how far humanity has regressed than the impossibility of finding a single nation, a single tribe, among whom birth still provokes mourning and lamentations.

Quote

I long to be free—desperately free. Free as the stillborn are free.

Quote

Without the faculty of forgetting, our past would weigh so heavily on our present that we should not have the strength to confront another moment, still less to live through it. Life would be bearable only to frivolous natures, those in fact who do not remember.

Quote

Better to be an animal than a man, an insect than an animal, a plant than an insect, and so on.

Salvation? Whatever diminishes the kingdom of consciousness and compromises its supremacy.

Quote

A conscious fruit fly would have to confront exactly the same difficulties, the same kind of insoluble problems as man.

 

Edited December 13, 2020 by Blackhawk

[Blackhawk]

It's happening again. God bless all. Good luck me. Will try to leave this body. I've been practicing for this. It's time. Difficult to type now. Bye. electroBeam is right:

 

It's impossible. Reality is impossible. The game is eternal because it's unsolvable.

Gods don't meet.

2 things are needed for a true seeker: putting Truth as the highest priority, even before your well being. And realizing and admitting to yourself that you don't know.

 

The episode is over now.

Edited December 13, 2020 by Blackhawk

[Blackhawk]

Emil M. Cioran:

Quote

Never judge a man without putting yourself in his place.” This old proverb makes all judgment impossible, for we judge someone only because, in fact, we cannot put ourselves in his place.

Quote

All my life, I have lived with the feeling that I have been kept from my true place. If the expression “metaphysical exile” had no meaning, my existence
alone would afford it one.