How to deal with parental emotional neglect?

[LearningPodo]

After 200+ days at home as an only child alone with my parents, I'm getting really depressed. My parents completely neglect me emotionally, but it's not their fault. They're just really old fashioned and grew up in harder times, it's not like they're doing it purposely. But basically every time I see them for dinner or whatever, they just like talk about really little stuff like the food and whatever and basically I feel completely ignored, and this has been going on for 200+ days. I don't know what to do about this. I'm a college student and I don't know when I'll return to campus but every time I go back to my room after dinner I spend like 30 minutes just sitting there feeling pain in my chest. I want to stay motivated but it's so hard when I internalise that I'm basically invisible.

[mandyjw]

What happens when you open up to them about stuff? Or ask them questions about their past? Or tell them about things you find exciting or interesting?

[LearningPodo]

23 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

What happens when you open up to them about stuff? Or ask them questions about their past? Or tell them about things you find exciting or interesting?

They would definitely talk about whatever, but mostly they live really unconsciously and like in a really small comfort zone. They're really sweet and everything, but I feel like most times they just joke around and almost have this depressive outlook on life, which I understand because of the time and environment they grew up in.

[The_Alchemist]

Just work on yourself, you can't expect them to improve themselves, it's simple, but that's all there is to it.

[mandyjw]

On 11/28/2020 at 7:48 PM, LearningPodo said:

They would definitely talk about whatever, but mostly they live really unconsciously and like in a really small comfort zone. They're really sweet and everything, but I feel like most times they just joke around and almost have this depressive outlook on life, which I understand because of the time and environment they grew up in.

A lot of people have learned to talk negatively in order to connect with others. You seem really understanding of why they are the way that they are. Sometimes when we see that we missed out on something or were treated in a way that was not ideal, it gives us clarity on the kind of life we want to create for ourselves and others. This evolution thing is a co-creation and it only moves forward. 

[soos_mite_ah]

ooff, this sounds like I posted this. I'm in the exact situation right down to the details. What helps me is keeping in touch with friends and using them as a source of emotional availability instead of expecting anything from my parents since they aren't able to provide for me in this area of my life.