The sickness called my life

[deci belle]

Somebody wrote:

Quote

Autonomy is not terribly engaging. Darn, off to a bad start already! Autonomous living, observing life without intending random interference... it is not easy; to truly lack intent to interfere has taken me all my life that I know of to consciously question the necessity of interference. THE WANT! THE DESIRE!! The "need" told to me every moment of every day... that I am told-- maybe it is ego? Maybe, maybe some mind monster that cannot be seen is all I know. I AM TOLD! That I need.... I need to get the girl, be the guy, I am supposed to earn the bacon and bring home the cash. I am told I need these things, but I ask why I need to "do" anything to "accomplish" anything that is of "necessity" if it IS in fact necessary? IF it is necessary, WHY? WHY do I need to? why do I NEED to impart effort to bring about this necessity? Unless... it is not, and never was in fact, ever, necessary at all?

A terrible start, indeed!! haha!! Actually you have brought out a few seminal points. Three, that I can see…

First, the latter bulk of your note is, "why is the need, necessary?" Well, it just is, and precisely because up to this point in your life, you have ignorantly maintained the need habitually. Somehow you have finally become aware of an immense source of affliction and suddenly, at this point of your life, you are, for the first time, doubting the need's validity. We perpetuate this kind of activity our whole lives without ever wondering why we got into it and become slaves to its process.

There is an ancient taoist fable illustrating this issue. A shepherd boy tasked with watching over his flock of sheep eventually teaches the sheep to sustain and protect themselves, so he can attend to spiritual studies. Eventually the flock and the boy come  to wandering endlessly without much in the way of afflictions and find their way to a vast hillside with all the grass the sheep will ever need. There they stayed until the sheep, one by one, turned into little white boulders. Thus freed from his worldly responsibility, the boy left the lovely scene to explore to the ends of the earth while penetrating the mysteries of taoist immortalism.

Just becoming aware (of being unconscious) of the draining mundanity of earthly concerns is a very essential and fundamental aspect of entry into authentic spiritual refinement. Until we do so, there is no way to realize how and what to get rid of in terms of that which needlessly wastes our allotment of potential. It's different for each individual, but the result of assessing the sickness called "my life" is the same. In buddhist teaching, it is said that we "use the sickness as the medicine." In other words, just DEAL WITH IT. Be aware that what you are dealing with is utterly void of meaning, and while you are continuously and subtly aware of its meaninglessness, just DEAL WITH IT. All that is required to begin authentic self-refining enlightening activity is to see through phenomena without denying its characteristics. Only deal with WHAT IS, without further projecting self-reifying thoughts unawares— which is what got you in the present predicament in the first place (other than being born and inheriting the ageless conventions of karmic psychological momentum.

The necessities of temporal living are simply unavoidable. They are what they are. What isn't necessary is being unconscious in the process of accruing needless necessities along the way, which only serve as self-made obstacles to seeing reality as is.

Secondly, you brought up the issue of compulsive activity. The need to interfere (in compliance with situational momentum) relative to pattern-based consciousness reifying the personality, is a massive obstacle to enlightening liberation. Such action only serves to perpetuate one's karmic bondage to random situational affairs as it blindly insinuates the compounded existence of the circumstantial identity-clusters defining the psychological apparatus of the being that is going to die.

We do this out of habit. Somehow failing to perpetuate (feed) the habit results in aggression, boredom and subtle or not-so subtle degrees of psychosis. It's not nice to fool (or ignore) Mother Nature. This barrier is very real. One must actually have a tremendous capacity for fearless, audacious intent to see such breaks in habit-consciousness through, bit by bit, gradually working against the flow of beginningless karmic momentum. This is not an analogy. It is a very long process.

Finally, the fact of the matter is that autonomy IS boring. But those who reach the other side ARE autonomous. Autonomy has no need for random stimulation. You want peace and calm? Good luck with that. You'll get that, but the work never ends. The alternative is self-pitying ignorance subject to the consequences of following thoughts unawares lifetime after lifetime.

 

 

ed note: remove "the" in 2nd paragraph

Edited December 5, 2020 by deci belle

[abrakamowse]

@deci belle

52 minutes ago, deci belle said:

Secondly, you brought up the issue of compulsive activity. The need to interfere (in compliance with situational momentum) relative to pattern-based consciousness reifying the personality, is a massive obstacle to enlightening liberation.

 Can you give an example of how to break those habits?  What kind of habits create that obstacle?

[Moksha]

@deci belle Very nice, and I agree with most of what you said. As I see it, autonomy is the opposite of boring. Freedom from attachment is the soul of creativity. What could be more delightful than infinite love?

[Display_Name]

Nice!

[deci belle]

Moksha made a relevant comment on autonomy in response to my observational cue in terms of autonomy/monotony as a given— which actually ties into abrakamowse' query on arriving at non-compulsive activity or non-activity; that is, doing nothing but leaving nothing undone.

What's authentically boring is nothing doing, and getting along with just that, as is. Boring is what it is, according with the time. My point is that when one is beyond compulsive influences relative to externals, action (or not) is not based on karmic momentum. Response is based on stillness, which is the seat of true spontaneity in accord with reality (potential). It was not my intent to make enlightening repose appear as unsexy~ but occasionally, such is the case— can you imagine how I manage in such instances? Well, obviously~ sporting higher or pointier footwear is key!!

Karmically influenced monotony is either cyclical, in which case it is wise to adapt to that much boredom, or it is a matter of chronic affliction— when one is unaccepting of a lack of external stimuli, relative to one's conditioned nature. Again, it would be wise to adapt to such temporary states of affliction as a matter of one's ever-changing response in accord with the time in order to introduce guidance and insight by way of self-refining intent.

Habit is itself is the obstacle to enlightening response. What's not habit? Viewing the world without views of self and other, comes to mind. Observing oneself viewing the world (with views or not) without further generating self-reifying psychological feedback is unexcelled practice.

So the susceptibility to compulsive activity is the state of being influenced not only by the general tenor of karmic momentum, but by one's tendency to be so influenced in the first place. Stopping and seeing that much is also unexcelled practice.

All I can say is that, in Moksha's perfect world, I would be a rock-star, since I have absolutely nothing better to do… pooh!! I got the guitars, the amps (obviously the talent), but do I practice? Yes, I do, but not like a fiend. I'm certainly not on the road to success, but I'm also not indulging in selfish opportunism— which means I have absolutely no ambition. That being said, the coalescence of a killer girl-gang is in the making~ time will tell… hehe.

 

 

ed note: typo penultimate paragraph

Edited December 5, 2020 by deci belle

[abrakamowse]

@deci belle Thanks for the clear explanation.

I am also at that point (more or less), is weird. Because in my case I like to draw. But when I discovered the there's not really a purpose in consciousness because consciousness is just what is, and it doesn't need a purpose... it does everything  because that's what it is. It just IS.

It let me without desires of doing anything, and right now I am in the way of recovering that desire but as you said, I have no ambition. I am doing because I like it and not because I wish to be famous, or anything.

Is a hard lesson to learn but that's the purpose of being alive, right?

Note: I think the word desire is not correct... but I couldn't find a better substitute for doing something for the sake of doing it.

Edited December 5, 2020 by abrakamowse

[Moksha]

@deci belle The beauty of deconditioning is that it frees the aspect of Consciousness that it was hiding from itself. This is ultimate freedom. No habits, no compulsions, no grasping for meaning, just the serenity and joy of Conscious being.

Boredom is a habit of the mind. It is resistance to being. In Consciousness, there is no boredom, because there are no attachments, to thoughts, to feelings, to actions, or to anything.

When people wake up, sometimes they will spend months, years, even the rest of their lives, just Consciously observing and enjoying the diversity of their creation in all forms.

For most though, there comes a time when Consciousness compels creation. It loves nothing more than to express itself, through all forms of art, but especially through love, which is the purest expression of art.

Rock Star like there is no tomorrow (because there actually isn't) ?

[deci belle]

Purpose? In terms of avocation? Good question. I don't know. I know it has no intrinsic meaning outside of cultural concerns relative to the psychological apparatus of the being that is going to die.

Self-refining practice (deconditioning) is one in the same as its application. Without applying self-refining (enlightening) activity in terms of actual situations, it is impossible to assess the aesthetic (psychological content) import of embodying Suchness. This is because Suchness is being as is, neither ordinary nor holy.

In doing so, projecting relative aesthetic concepts such as beauty, creativity, enjoyment and the like isn't on my map. I've worked internationally in fashion advertising and motion picture photography and have been guiding professionally (alpinism) for as long as that. I know it when I see it, and I know it when I don't see it. Being paid to see it is different.

Enlightening activity is what it is, which is profound entry into the inconceivable nature of nonoriginated being. Let's not bring this discussion down to a level of aesthetic appreciation.

Edited December 5, 2020 by deci belle

[abrakamowse]

@deci belle Well, I was thinking more of a purpose coming from the desire of doing something, or achieving something, a more egoic kind of achievement.

Avocation in the sense of a "hobby" or something done for the sake of creating it, as @Moksha said, maybe that's more the kind of purpose reality has... but as you said... I don't know either.

Edited December 5, 2020 by abrakamowse

[deci belle]

Ok, the purpose of achieving  projections relative to one's egoic desires… that would be success?

Don Juan Matus said that it doesn't matter whether one is successful or not in such contexts. What is important is that a warrior is geared for the struggle. That's all. An aspect of not-doing is doing something for the hell of it— not in terms of kicks or daring-do, but in term of not being attached to outcomes. That definitely does not apply to the purposes of egoic  achievement, I suppose.

 

 

ed note:add "egoic" in first line

Edited December 5, 2020 by deci belle

[Carl-Richard]

What?

[Moksha]

@deci belle What is your view on:

1. The dharma of humans is to help one another
2. Suchness, invariably infused with Consciousness, is inherently holy
3. The difference between aesthetic beauty, as realized by human eyes, and spiritual beauty, as realized by Consciousness itself

[deci belle]

One must help oneself before one is able to truly help others without attachment to outcomes.

I have one for you, Moksha:

What is the dharma of buddhas?

As for #2 and #3~ stop fishing, please.

I said drop the pussy-footing around with psychologically-based aesthetic considerations having nothing to do with the spiritual. It's off-topic and has absolutely nothing to do with self-refinement as carried out by the audacious. Do not persist in your tack.

The Dharma-eye is not the person. The true human with no status is not concerned with conventions of beauty of self-indulgent rat-eyes.

The second chapter of the Tao te Ching states that when all the world knows beauty, but that becomes beautiful, this becomes ugly; when everyone knows good is good, this is not good.

Do not speak for the likes of Consciousness— especially since you have not seen it.

The truth is, THERE IS NO THING. You have absolutely no idea of what you are talking about… spiritual beauty as realized by Consciousness, indeed.

Quote

 

In doing so, projecting relative aesthetic concepts such as beauty, creativity, enjoyment and the like isn't on my map. I've worked internationally in fashion advertising and motion picture photography and have been guiding professionally (alpinism) for as long as that. I know it when I see it, and I know it when I don't see it. Being paid to see it is different.

Enlightening activity is what it is, which is profound entry into the inconceivable nature of nonoriginated being. Let's not bring this discussion down to a level of aesthetic appreciation.

 

What you are doing is rank virtue-signaling. Drop it.

 

 

ed note: add last line

Edited December 6, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

 

Via PM:

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Obstacles are self generated, just as much as goals are, no doubt? So do I drop my objectives, or do i drop my obstacles? HOW do I know them apart? Are my goals the source of the obstacles as well, thus I must forget wanting or pursuing and just "be" content with "being"?

Well, that’s a good point. But it is possible to actually gain insight into the degree of obstruction the situation can handle in terms of adapting desire by way of of mutual response. Taoism says to follow desire without stepping over the line. The line you don’t cross is in identifying desire as an obstacle, the source of affliction, when the source of affliction is in oneself. Adapting potential to situational karma isn’t easy, but it isn’t difficult either.

Actually, afflictive desire is indicative of a hot-spot of potential on the verge of going into action— which is decidedly not how to handle potential. The way to deal with potential is in responding in such a way as to meet the exigencies of the situation without projecting pattern-based personality-issues and going off on tangents that introduce personal (selfish) influence on the situation relative to self-gratification— even if your only concern is escape. Let the situation contain itself within the confines of the situation, that’s all. Allowing potential to leak out relative to self-reifying pattern-consciousness is how ordinary people deal with situational momentum.

Turn it on or dial it back. It's up to you how you subtly operate the sickness as the medicine. Typical buddhist method is simply in terms of observing potential, then observing mutual response. That’s all there is to it. Using potential is in not using it. Seeing potential is like a natural highlight on what’s important at any given time in terms of situational evolution. Objective observation without following thoughts unawares is the unexcelled method of spiritual adepts.

Otherwise, obstacle are most definitely self-generated. Just by being present, you are absolutely culpable. There are no innocent bystanders. There are also no survivors.

If you can be content with the inherent goodness of just being and enter a situation intuitively in its muddy stages (your natural ignorance stirs up sediment by it’s inherent instability at first) and then observe the situation clarifying itself, so you become a real part of the organic process. But there is no telling what will evolve. It's a matter of trusting your luck, neither courting honor nor avoiding ignominy, maintaining objective insight into potential.

Sages start "work" in the incipience of a situation and wait. The 3rd hexagram talks about the difficulties. Also consult Chuang Tzu's "The True Men" for insight into those who may have plans and desires to carry into fruition.

Nothing beats not having ideas. Selfish motives, however altruistic they may be, will never qualify as spontaneous, much less selfless. Spontaneity dwells in the incipience of potential; it is a matter of fluid selfless response to the time. 

That's why enlightening activity is adapted to conditions as they evolve within the natural timing of creation's trends. Meeting the needs of the times is the way to incur the least amount of obstruction. "Perfection is easy easy for those with no preferences”. But if there is monumental accord within the gravitas of the time, then response in accord with reality is that which arises incipiently within its potential. This is the way of sages.

 

 

ed note: add "by way of" in 2nd paragraph; change "clarify" to "clarifying" in 6th paragraph

Edited December 6, 2020 by deci belle

[Moksha]

@deci belle The dharma of buddhas is love.

Don't make the mistake of dismissing what I have said as aesthetic fascination. There is nothing more beautiful than Consciousness realizing itself. To dismiss this realization, and its expression, as "boring" is to paint a giant target on your ignorance.

If you have seen spiritually, you understand that Consciousness is love. It is not a mere virtue, it is its holy self. I have realized myself, and you, as Consciousness. And yes, we are beautiful.

[ajai]

@Moksha 

What is Love?

What is Consciousness?

(Do you mean both the terms mean one and the same thing?)

And also, if you'd like to tell,

What is Dharma?

Answers will be much appreciated. Thanks.

[Moksha]

Hi @ajai, I only directly realize Consciousness as Love. As a pointer, I understand dharma to be the intent of Consciousness.

Edited December 6, 2020 by Moksha

[ajai]

@Moksha Okay, thank-you.

[Moksha]

@ajai ? ?