Cynicism

[28 cm unbuffed]

Sooooooooooooooooo

It's like the highest level I ever achieved with my life I think in regards to life in general. I'm pretty smart guy, I'm intelligent, whatever, and it's like a state that went back to me after years of fucking around and doing stupid, random shit with my life, that was all just a way to cut off that feeling looks like lol.

I've been into psychology, philosophy and all of that stuff already when I was pretty fucking young, like 14-15 maybe and I found out then that it's all fucking nonsense and it all has no sense whatsoever. Then my IQ and life wisdom somehow dropped, or I made it to drop a lot by drinking, smoking weed, cigarretes, playing games etc. Now I got my shit back together, I eat well, exercise, work, etc AND HERE WE GO AGAIN IT'S ALL NONSESNE.

Don't get me wrong - I work a lot, I do a lot of things, I keep it positive, I'm a good person, etc. By it's all so fucking nihilistic. I try my best, trust me on that, I work as a motherfucking mule, learn a lot, etc. Yet -  let's be fucking honest - world is nonsense, people are fucked up animals, everything is fucked, everyone is fucked lol.

Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuk

[Preety_India]

I feel like maybe you want to say something more but you hide it. 

Is there something more going on that is causing you to feel this way? 

The other conclusion I made is that you are a perfectionist. 

And because of your perfectionism you don't have much to look forward to, it's like you already exhausted yourself through your perfect set up. 

Now you are going through the dopamine low after having been through dopamine high. 

This is typical in narcissism. 

You go through the high where you push yourself to make things perfect and then you go through the low where there is nothing to expect when all you wanted is already done so you begin to feel that everything is nonsense the way you would feel after winning a video game, that you already achieved so now no more drive or motivation left. 

 Am I right? 

 

[Preety_India]

@28 cm unbuffed I think you are a pretty smart guy but maybe you need to slow down. 

Be positive. Do you need romantic love? "

Whats lacking exactly? 

Do you think you reached pre-maturation? 

What excites you to start a day? 

 

[Megan Alecia]

Do you know what your Enneagram type is? 

Edited November 27, 2020 by Megan Alecia

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Preety_India

Don't know, I'm an "old soul", if you believe in that type of stuff, I don't give a damn about petty things, but I would not say I'm mature, I'm a silly, goofy dude in general. I troll all the times not to get bored with life.

About everyday life - I don't know, I'm pretty excited about out of the ordinary world stuff, signs from universe, synchronicities, basically when life becomes a little bit more psychedelic then normal, spiritual awakening was huge for me, I will never forget that shit. I also experienced telepathy and clairvoyence, that was pretty fucking awesome.

Not really sure what's lacking - I would say people, that are hyped with all of this stuff, not society bullshit. People in Poland are still living in 2000s lol.

About love - don't know, never been in love, I think it's just chemistry and a person to impress me really would have to be freaking awesome, never met person like that in my life, not to mention a hot chick.

I don't want to slow down, I wasted tons of time, because of tens of traumas that I am not even guilty for, no father, narcissistic mother, fucked up growing up environment, I just left a fucking cage just to find out that zoo is full of shit and I want to get out of zoo right now, USA is my dream, but to leave Poland and move there I have to get six figures company, so I am working on that right now.

@Megan Alecia

Not sure, i would say it's a mix of INTP INTJ and INFJ. 5w4 enneagram

 

 

 

[No Self]

2 hours ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

Yet -  let's be fucking honest - world is nonsense, people are fucked up animals, everything is fucked, everyone is fucked lol.

A Bible prophet said the same thing, albeit with slightly different phrasing.

I have seen all the things that are done under the sun, and have found them all to be futile, a pursuit of the wind.15What is crooked cannot be straightened, and what is lacking cannot be counted

Ecclesiastes 1:14

[Michael569]

2 hours ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

Don't get me wrong - I work a lot, I do a lot of things, I keep it positive, I'm a good person, etc. By it's all so fucking nihilistic. I try my best, trust me on that, I work as a motherfucking mule, learn a lot, etc. Yet -  let's be fucking honest - world is nonsense, people are fucked up animals, everything is fucked, everyone is fucked lol.

Seems like your life is missing a deeper purpose. What's your greatest vision for your life? What are you going to do? Why are you here? How are you going to help humanity, the animals, the planet? 

Do you have a dream that makes you cry when you think about it?.....Out of fear (because you don't know how you're ever going to achieve it) & out of joy (because it is so grandiose) at the same time? 

Or do you waste your time trying to persuade everybody that life is shit and that it is pointless because everything is one and nothing makes sense? 

Be careful not to fall into zen devilry with this sort of mindset. Find your greatest passion in life and channel all this unused energy into that. Don't rest until you have found it. 

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Michael569

Dude, don't know, let's be fucking real, there is nothing that "makes you cry", life is not a fairytale

[Michael569]

21 minutes ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

Dude, don't know, let's be fucking real, there is nothing that "makes you cry", life is not a fairytale

cut that macho shit out and open your eyes...

[Forestluv]

I know a lot of intellectuals that are miserable. I doubt there is a positive correlation between intellect and personal wellness. 

[Breakingthewall]

great, you're right, there's no happiness out there, just disappointment. maybe the time has come to look inside

[Preety_India]

@28 cm unbuffed  I hope you find your destination. 

 

[Megan Alecia]

@neutralempty Back that up at least. 

[aurum]

6 hours ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

Dude, don't know, let's be fucking real, there is nothing that "makes you cry", life is not a fairytale

Well I think we found what you need to focus on .

How might this belief be holding you back?

How might it be serving you?

[lmfao]

@28 cm unbuffed Why did you title the thread 'cynicism' ? 

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Michael569 What's macho about being real?

@Breakingthewall  I'm always looking inside first because the outside is the reflection, I know. I have to either move out from Poland or find really valuable people here.

@neutralempty Not sure if I'm bullshitting, it's all true, yet, I know I might be just looking for excuses.

@aurum I don't think it's a belief, it's truth

@lmfao  Because that's my overall state of being right now

 

[Nahm]

@28 cm unbuffed

If you came to be a mule, you’d be a mule. You came to express and manifest your dream life. When you start, you’ll know source, and source makes sense of everything. Why all the dilly dally?

[PurpleTree]

maybe you need more nature in your life.

looking at trees, sitting on some moss, observe a bug, go to the beach look at the water surface.

maybe someone you know has a dog you can take into nature for walks.

i don't think that's nonsense

Edited November 28, 2020 by PurpleTree

[28 cm unbuffed]

@neutralempty Mate, you don't know me, I'm working 24/7, doing everything, like perfection-type-beat, not slacking off, putting all my heart every day, it's just after all of that struggle it's still not really worth a penny imo. If you would see one day of my life you would say that I'm a robot or something. 

@Nahm Right now I don't really see an alternative, to pursue my dreams I need tons of money, to make it I gotta hustle

@PurpleTree These type of things doesn't really move me, I tried, I forced myself, I'm just not that kind of a person

I am talking a walk everyday, I got a cat recently, I know it's all human things, but I just do them (like meeting with people and stuff I mentioned) to feel better and be more productive, as it's part of our nature.

Edited November 28, 2020 by 28 cm unbuffed

[Nahm]

@28 cm unbuffed

Maybe your current dream is to have tons of money.