I don't care enough.

[Godhead]

In my life, I've had some encounters with suffering.

Throughout that time I have developed an "I don't care" attitude as a coping mechanism. Now, this has some benefits as I am not very attached to things and I don't struggle as much with emotional/attachment problems as others seem to do.

However, it also seems to rob me of a lot of motivation. When people like Leo talk about building a compelling vision... I can't really think of something very compelling where I would care enough to put the work in. Give me a house with millions of dollars and a great career? Meh. I don't care.

I'm curious if yall have any advice on how to work through that problem.

Edited November 19, 2020 by Godhead

[No Self]

Eckhart Tolle has commented on this situation before. He says that true surrender/nonattachment is different from "I don't care", since the latter still carries the burden of an ego.

If a compelling vision means "I will be happy when this or that happens", this is just a treadmill. But if the striving towards goals comes as a result of the joy of being, and there is no attachment to success or failure, you cannot go wrong and will be enjoying the step being taken right now.

Normally we have to keep revisiting these issues over and over, as the ego will never stop trying to sneak back into the driver's seat.

[caspex]

I think you shouldn't work towards developing motivation towards a great house and million of dollars. Rather find something that you find motivating. Someone might have a passion to live a ordinary life in some cabin in the mountains rather than a mansion with cars. 

I think it usually always takes time to find what you love to do. And rather than coping with your suffering and pleasure with "I don't care" attitude, instead, see the emptiness in them, and realize that their is no reason to get serious on this rather than a SHOULD or repetitive statement like "Meh. It don't care". See WHY you aren't caring. And I think seeing the beauty in everything will also help with finding joy in something that you like.

[Godhead]

18 minutes ago, No Self said:

But if the striving towards goals comes as a result of the joy of being, and there is no attachment to success or failure, you cannot go wrong and will be enjoying the step being taken right now.

I putting this in my commonplace book  thank you.

16 minutes ago, Swarnim said:

I think you shouldn't work towards developing motivation towards a great house and million of dollars. Rather find something that you find motivating. Someone might have a passion to live a ordinary life in some cabin in the mountains rather than a mansion with cars. 

Yeah of course, and your example actually does sound more appealing  , I just tried to outline a random big dream that people have. 

 

 

[mandyjw]

You may actually have very different desires from those that you think you should have or see others being motivated by. Be brave enough to figure out what they are and go for them. 

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, Godhead said:

In my life, I've had some encounters with suffering.

Throughout that time I have developed an "I don't care" attitude as a coping mechanism. Now, this has some benefits as I am not very attached to things and I don't struggle as much with emotional/attachment problems as others seem to do.

However, it also seems to rob me of a lot of motivation. When people like Leo talk about building a compelling vision... I can't really think of something very compelling where I would care enough to put the work in. Give me a house with millions of dollars and a great career? Meh. I don't care.

I'm curious if yall have any advice on how to work through that problem.

Attachment is only to thought, not ‘things’, not ‘emotional problems’.  In mistaking this, a narrative of the ‘it’ is weaved and unnoticed. “ ‘It’ seems to rob me of motivation.” Of course, one ‘robs’ oneself of motivation, but, how? The motive is to limit oneself as to protect against feeling any suffering. The motive employed is actually working perfectly, it’s just not what you want anymore. Inspiration is what you want. The difference is living to avoid circumstances, vs living in creating them. Video on this later today. 

Inspection wise, start with the thought “ I “, which is being credited with caring or not caring. 

[Mu_]

8 hours ago, Godhead said:

In my life, I've had some encounters with suffering.

Throughout that time I have developed an "I don't care" attitude as a coping mechanism. Now, this has some benefits as I am not very attached to things and I don't struggle as much with emotional/attachment problems as others seem to do.

However, it also seems to rob me of a lot of motivation. When people like Leo talk about building a compelling vision... I can't really think of something very compelling where I would care enough to put the work in. Give me a house with millions of dollars and a great career? Meh. I don't care.

I'm curious if yall have any advice on how to work through that problem.

If you really want to work through this type of thing (not a fan of the word problem since these are just ideas and stories) then I'd start with what are you coping from with "I dont care".  It may suck and feel shitty or scarey or visceral in some way, but do a little peaking into this at a time and go deeper as you feel more interest and desire.  Take notes, think about what youve discovered from time to time and ask is it the way you want to remain or are you open to a different way of being.  Then let nature take its course.

[Godhead]

@Nahm Thank you Nahm. I always appreciate your posts  

5 hours ago, Nahm said:

Video on this later today. 

What do you mean by this?

6 minutes ago, Mu_ said:

not a fan of the word problem

Yeah I get it, maybe "not in alignment with what I want to be" is more spot on. 

8 minutes ago, Mu_ said:

start with what are you coping from with "I dont care"

The thing is, these days there isn't a lot of coping necessary it just seems that the behavior pattern is still there.

[Nahm]

16 minutes ago, Godhead said:

Thank you Nahm. I always appreciate your posts  

Thanks, and you too

Quote

What do you mean by this?

Just a strong intuition. Give it a search on YouTube tonight. Things have a way of working out for you. 

Quote

Yeah I get it, maybe "not in alignment with what I want to be" is more spot on. 

The thing is, these days there isn't a lot of coping necessary it just seems that the behavior pattern is still there.

I hear on the ‘give me a house with millions of dollars and a great career’, meh. I felt the same way. Can’t recommend the dreamboard enough. Trying to think of what will inspire and evoke passion is difficult to impossible. But seeing everything you like, love, want to experience, do, be, have, etc...in front of you, in one big picture, is very different. It’s like you’re whole life ‘clicks’, and that which you are uniquely inspired and passionate about comes to the surface. It’s both completely unexpected, and yet makes sense of your whole life this far and going forward. But it’s a direct experience thing.  After adding to it for x number of days, it culminates, coagulates, and reveals. 

Also, the ‘what I want to be’ is a tricky lens, and might be feeding into the ‘behavior pattern’. I’ve found ‘what I want to experience’ to be more flow-ish in filling the board from the heart. A short stoic ‘I indeed will die one day’ meditation stokes the fire as well. And whatever ‘comes up’ for you, comes up for you. You can’t ‘get it wrong’. However, it is highly likely that ‘click’ is going to be along the lines of sharing with the world what is unique about you, and what you love. 

[aurum]

11 hours ago, Godhead said:

I'm curious if yall have any advice on how to work through that problem.

Yes, I wrote a post about this earlier. You've got to get real with what you're avoiding.

The "I don't care" is your shield.

How is pretending not to care keeping you safe?

Be specific.

What is the worst thing that would happen if you cared?

[Godhead]

Well as said, nowadays the "I don't care" behavior seems to be a leftover pattern from times where suffering was more prominent. What is it protecting me from these days? 

Idk maybe achieving my goals because I don't care enough about them? What seems to be protected is my lazy self. 

[Someone here]

@Godhead  " do it if you love it.. Or don't do it and don't care" 

-charles bukwoski. 

[Gesundheit]

On 19/11/2020 at 1:17 PM, Godhead said:

I don't care enough.

How do you know or determine what enough caring is?

What if you were right the whole time and everyone else was wrong?

Edited November 20, 2020 by Gesundheit

[Leo Gura]

Some people simply have no ambition.

Without ambition you can live a simple life, but you won't achieve anything big. Cause you don't care.

But also, if you really don't care, then what's the problem? Unless you actually do care?

There is no cure for lack of ambition.

[Applegarden]

1 minute ago, Leo Gura said:

Some people simply have no ambition.

Without ambition you can live a simple life, but you won't achieve anything big. Cause you don't care.

But also, if you really don't care, then what's the problem? Unless you actually do care?

There is no cure for lack of ambition.

I have to disagree, there IS cure for lack of ambition. And there are MULTIPLE.

1) Enabling your well being so you feel better during the day (reduces the need of instant gradification needs);

2) Directing your desires and efforts to a larger project, for life purpose, hobby, responsibility e.c.t., larger vision than you basically;

3) purnattva based spirituality;

Ambition shows when you feel like you are wasting your life, when you feel you could have been doing something more productive and you are doing something boring - 9to5, too many instant gratification e.c.t;

Acctually @Godhead has ambition. Why? Because this post exists. He is somewhat troubled by this and is in fact looking for something different.

I would suggest that @Godhead would try to decide something to do (as Leo's life purpose course suggests) and do something, develop a taste for intensity, activity, problem solving, creativity and explore the rewards, process, feeling or bliss of that and appreciate the pletau's and struggles and the bittersweetness of the process of directed action by directed desire. There seems to be a problem that limits intrinsic motivation, but it is there as a working mechanism in everybody;

What I mean in short is - hobbying, career, relationships e.c.t. - journaling, finding out what long term activities fits your skillset e,c,t, and put effort into that, at least try for a year;

I don't think things like boredom is the same as lack of ambition - lack of ambition is more like a form of self-denial where you don't think you are good enough to even try and enjoy something in a really shady and sneaky way.

That's my two cents, suggesting LP course here.

 

[Leo Gura]

@Applegarden Well, if he has it, then that isn't a cure. That's him having it.

I'm talking about people who don't have it to begin with.

High ambition is a curse though. Trust me, you may regret wanting it It's a lot easier to be happy without it. But you also won't accomplish anything.

[Applegarden]

14 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Applegarden Well, if he has it, then that isn't a cure. That's him having it.

I'm talking about people who don't have it to begin with.

I tend to think everybody has ambition - acctually something more basic than that, the ambition producing facility in you, just like we have emotions, body parts, toughts e.c.t.

"Lack of intrinsic motivation" or i don't care is more like a clogged up pipe or a closed chakra, if it is directed it is bound to find it's expression and he shows intelligence to attempt to solve this problem by the same mechanism. He has enough ambition to find the problem for his lack of ambition - so therefore I mean he absolutely has amibiton. He is in the beginning of the journey where you are crossing multiple laps. It is after all exponential-like growth in self-dev. From 30 minutes of visualiation to intense years of action towards big projects.

The actual problem of the clogged pipe - and this is just the case with most of us - it is clogged by our dietary choices, mindset, lack of exercise, media, instant pleasures e.c.t., so that muse never finds expression, but the mechanism is there and it's in fact working to some degree. You described it pretty well in your - getting in touch with your higher self video. That is literally a starter for directed desire, where ambition shows.

I am very suprised that you are not saying the following things:

Visioning is the cure for lack of ambition;

Self-development is the cure for lack of ambition;

Meditation and spirituality is the cure for lack of ambition;

Taking yourself less seriously, detaching from outcome, mastery, hero's journey, more emotionally motivating concepts are the solution for this problem;

Stopping dabbling, taking decisions e.c.t. are cures for lack of ambition;

Sure we are dealing with a complex problem here, however, there are steps to infuse that instrinsic motivation which is synonymous with ambition;

I guess you have forgotten about the value you keep providing.  

And people HAVE IT just like they have arms and legs, just like some people have never in their life experienced bliss, because they havent awakened these faculties. But it is there, even if its malfunctioning in a form of regret, dissatisfaction e.c.t., that is a projection of unused ambition units, which is what this post is about.

 

Edited November 20, 2020 by Applegarden

[Hello from Russia]

I reckon the possibility that if you've had some boring-ass unambitious life in past lifetimes or if you lived as a monk in those lives you may naturally be born with lots of natural drive without really any good reason why.

I feel this is in a similar way with me, I can clearly see that I could live a fairly simple existence (and maybe I will at the end of my life), but it just "makes sense" for me to do stuff, to go experience life, to build or attempt to build some grandiose things.

There is no judgment, there is no FOMO or neurosis about the subject for me (although you for sure can of course be very neurotic about this topic), it just simply IS (If it makes sense).

It could easily be any other way around and it would still be perfect, despite having or not having regreats/fears/neuroses in this alternative existence. It is just different ways of being, it just is.

Edited November 20, 2020 by Hello from Russia

[aklacor727]

@Godhead it could've started as a coping mechanism, but the more you coped with things in that way, could it be that you eventually you came to identify as being this care free, laid back,  doesnt care, type of person? 

Identity is a huge part of what drives the behavior in a person..  If you want to change your behavior change your self image. Psychocybernetics is a book that has alot of information on how to approach that. 

Maybe what you need is to see yourself as the ambitious go getter type of person first, before you are able to get to the point of having a strong compelling vision ?