Are YOU Leo's new girlfriend? (serious)

[soos_mite_ah]

In defense of having a lot of criteria on looks over say personality, I think there might be a reason for it that is beyond aesthetic preferences (though that is still there). I feel that if you go too in depth of what you want in terms of personality with a potential date, there can be room for dishonesty and manipulation. A manipulative person will try to emulate the exact requirements in order to get what they want. Best case scenario, you get your time wasted because the person you're dating puts up a facade and you werent getting to know the real them. Worst case scenario, the facade works, you get attached, and get into a toxic or even abusive situation. 

Personally, I have been on a few dates where the guy I was on a date with  ask me "hey what do you look for in a guy?" Granted I know that question isnt always loaded with malefic intentions, but I try to be careful if its someone I don't know very well. I usually answer that with something along the lines of "oh I want someone who is respectful, authentic, honest, and stable." It answers the question, expresses my values and what I look for, and most importantly it's still general enough to where there is room for interpretation so he cant simply transform himself into a caricature of what I like in order for him to get whatever he wants from me.

A lot of the personality requirements for dating is not something you can write and put up as a requirement per se. It's something you need to talk to the person and figure out on your own. After all any one can sell themselves as for example "authentic" but there is a self bias that is involved at the very least if that makes sense. 

[iceprincess]

1 hour ago, neutralempty said:

@iceprincess@iceprincess attractive, thin, job, not on psychiatric drugs, mentally healthy, stuff like that

lol so basically what everyone wants 

[Victor van Rijn]

 

Dear  @Leo Gura

I wish you all the joy and intimacy you desire!

From my own personal experience of having had about 6 long term serious conscious relationships and various shorter explorations I encourage everyone to (re-)open their hearts and engage in a mutually loving co-creation, because it matters not how enlightened you are, only together we are one being.

And by being the one you would like to meet and loving yourself enough, you are naturally inviting interactions that are in harmony with your highest excitement and purpose. In relationships we teach each other many subtle and valuable things about ourselves, and they are a perfect playing ground to embody our love and wisdom.

I can only imagine Leo enjoying and benefitting from this current incarnation even more, by him having a conscious and loving relationship with a partner that currently matches his inner state of being. 

For anyone that may be insisting too much on needing a partner I recommend this podcast by Bentinho about the fallacy of relationships:

 

[andyjohnsonman]

This forum is like being at a meet up with my mother and her friends 

Edited November 19, 2020 by andyjohnsonman

[Thewritersunion]

@andyjohnsonman we will reform it

[Marissa Machado]

As far as the eye can see, Leo deserves everything on that list and more.

Not that my perspective holds a lot of weight here, but the one tricky thing with posting it on his website is it can be, operative word CAN, be looked at as exploitive.

But right on! I would love to date Leo, at least I think so, (I have two disqualifiers),  but then I had a thought like I would be gaining  an awesome partner, but losing my commute companion/ my teacher! He’s a valuable tool! At the very least, my one-sided relationship with Leo would evolve into something totally different! So, it’s tricky sticky… the potential of that shifting is scary! 

I would say my initial, lower-self reaction was something like… haha

but the higher perspective is like it’s his life, his preferences, he’s being clear, upfront, no-nonsense . That’s refreshing, but with that comes a bit of intimidation on the receiving end. 

 

[Leo Gura]

5 hours ago, Hello from Russia said:

@Leo Gura  Would you say that any type of romantic love is survival-based? Like, we fall in love with people who would benefit our survival agenda in some way and don't care at all about those who don't or don't do it well enough?

All you have to do to see that your romance is completely self-biased and survival based is to contemplate why you don't get romantic with a gorilla. There is absolutely no reason why you should relate with humans more than gorillas other than survival.

Absolutely everything involving sex is pure self-bias. Why do you not hump a light-post? Sex is COMPLETELY arbitrary and relative. And the only reason you do it is because it has survival value for the species.

But don't get me wrong. This doesn't mean you can't have deep intimate relationships. You can! Just stop fooling yourself about what it is you're doing. You are using those relationships to enhance your survival. You are doing that without admitting you are doing it. Self-deception 101.

5 hours ago, electroBeam said:

You're right but i think labelling relationships as just completely and utterly a big, swirling survival game sort of muddles the water between conscious vs unconscious, healthy vs unhealthy, decent vs indecent relationships. It gives you a free pass to be a dick and view women red pillish. Because hey its all a big toxic ego game anyway right? Being a dick is just survival! And this mindset isnt good for you, let alone the woman.

Except that's your projection, not anything I said.

Relationships are survival. But saying so does not devalue the relationship in any way. It's just being honest about what you're doing. People get the very wrong idea here that I am anti deep relationships. Not at all. You can do deep intimate relationships with consciousness and spiritual aspects. But it's still a survival game.

People love the illusion of it not being a game. It makes the ego feel justified in its raw survival. The ego needs to paint a pretty story about how all of its purely arbitrary survival needs and manipulations are in fact legit, pure, good, honest, truthful, and selfless. Women especially fall into this illusion and they really upset when it is pointed out them.

Both men and women are selfish as devils when it comes to sex. The selfishness is asymmetrical, with each side denying their own particular brand of selfishness while being outraged by the selfishness of the opposite side. And all of this is, of course, just more selfishness! And all of this is, of course, denied with great passion and fury.

It would be much simpler if you just came out and said: "I am a selfish devil and I want sex under conditions X, Y, Z because that's what serves me best." But of course you cannot do that because it harms your survival. Your community will judge you for it and you can't stomach admitting to yourself just how selfish you are. So you must keep all your true motivations and conditions secret, even from yourself.

[electroBeam]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

 

People love the illusion of it not being a game. It makes the ego feel justified in its raw survival. The ego needs to paint a pretty story about how all of its purely arbitrary survival needs and manipulations are in fact legit, pure, good, honest, truthful, and selfless.

I get that, and considering how society is too far the other way (conflating survival love with true love) the massive pushback you do on here has its merits.

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

 

Relationships are survival. But saying so does not devalue the relationship in any way. It's just being honest about what you're doing. People get the very wrong idea here that I am anti deep relationships. Not at all. You can do need intimate relationships with consciousness and spiritual aspects.

But consciousness and spiritual aspects are not survival. And I may be projecting lots of stuff, but I'm not projecting your explicit omission of the non survival aspects in relationships.

6 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

But it's still a survival game.

And omitting the non survival stuff which can be included in relationships, makes the view of relationships impartial and incomplete. And it does lead to distorted views on here. 

I agree that relationships are survival, but they aren't just survival, they are spiritual and conscious aspects built on top of survival. Just like how your meditation is built on top of the survival of society. Omitting the spiritual aspects is omitting the icing on the cake, and it definitely does lead to toxicity, dissatisfaction, anti-truth behaviour, excuses for manipulating women. 

[Leo Gura]

8 minutes ago, electroBeam said:

But consciousness and spiritual aspects are not survival.

That's questionable in a relationship context.

The problem is the ego loves to co-opt spirituality and consciousness for survival. It's a very deceptive and murky process.

Is there something like a genuine connection with another human? Yes. But it is wrapped in layers of survival stuff which will always linger.

But hey, I'm sick of preaching this stuff. Go contemplate how your dating and relationships truly work for yourselves. If you dare.

Consider this: the only reason you guys follow me is because it gives you survival value. As soon as my ability to give you value disappears, you will leave me or hate me. Yet in your minds you don't think of it that way. In your minds you think you really appreciate me for who I am. Of course this is pure fantasy. You don't really care who I am. If I was Hitler, you would want me killed. Such is life. Accept it and move on.

[Leo Gura]

4 minutes ago, Husseinisdoingfine said:

@Leo Gura Serious question: Have you ever had other experiences of incredibly cruel and vulgur women hurt your self esteem really bad? Like in the areas of your appearance, career, etc...

No

One of the things pickup teaches you is to stop caring what women say about you. It simply does not matter. But you can only learn this lesson the hard way, by going out and getting rejected 1000s of times.

[Leo Gura]

2 minutes ago, Husseinisdoingfine said:

But has any woman tried?

I don't even remember. Doesn't matter.

[electroBeam]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

That's questionable in a relationship context.

The problem is the ego loves to co-opt spirituality and consciousness for survival. It's a very deceptive and murky process.

Definitely, but don't forget, its universal. Why are people on here trying to get enlightened other then so they can turn into some messiah to be blunt about it?

3 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

The problem is the ego loves to co-opt spirituality and consciousness for survival. It's a very deceptive and murky process.

Yep that's a huge problem, and as a mystic its your job to kind of eliminate that. I don't think sitting in a cave will resolve that. If anything sitting in a cave will allow the ego to spiritually bypass the shadows found in relationships. 

4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

But hey, I'm sick of preaching this stuff. Go contemplate how your dating and relationships truly work for yourselves. If you dare.

I have personally, and I bet many on here have aswell. But once you've done the dare and saw how terribly egoic and survivalish and horrible your relationships are, you gotta swing the pendulum back to add in the conscious aspects

And btw, except for some of the women, not many on here think relationships aren't all survival, infact they are too far in that direction, they have more along the lines of red pill mentality then lovey dovy sort of stuff. 

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, electroBeam said:

I don't think sitting in a cave will resolve that. If anything sitting in a cave will allow the ego to spiritually bypass the shadows found in relationships.

I'm not sitting in a cave. I was trying to create a deep romantic relationship. I will create a video about Conscious Relationships in the future. Once you see it, you'll see me in a different light. I just haven't had the time to shoot it yet.

Nothing I said is Redpill. I got no animosity towards women and I disagree with most of the Redpill philosophy. It's absurdly self-biased.

[electroBeam]

14 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Accept it and move on.

Moving on means seeing that our love for you is conditional helps us see that our love for God is unconditional

Which means we should love the fact that we only care about you because you provide us value, if we cared about you for who you are, how the fuck would we let you go to get enlightened?

Its a beautiful dance of getting and chucking away, like elegantly designed staircases to heaven. 

Its not all just you're a fucken horrible piece of shit because all you care about is survival. Yeah we are horrible pieces of shit, and that's beautiful because it helps us see that we are all infinite love. 

 

You said in the past that you want to go into a cave. I was basing it on that.

And I didn't say you have redpill garbage, I said your followers do, so the stuff you say might not be appropriate for them.

Edited November 19, 2020 by electroBeam

[Leo Gura]

3 minutes ago, electroBeam said:

Its not all just you're a fucken horrible piece of shit

You're not horrible, you're just engaging in creating illusions and playing sneaky games. That's life as a human. It's sneaky.

[Akemrelax]

48 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

It would be much simpler if you just came out and said: "I am a selfish devil and I want sex under conditions X, Y, Z because that's what serves me best." But of course you cannot do that because it harms your survival. Your community will judge you for it and you can't stomach admitting to yourself just how selfish you are. So you must keep all your true motivations and conditions secret, even from yourself.

That’s basically an arranged marriage in Indian culture. Imo they do really well. People tend to confuse it with forced marriage, they’re different. 

[Preety_India]

10 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

That’s basically an arranged marriage in Indian culture. Imo they do really well. People tend to confuse it with forced marriage, they’re different. 

Biggest bias. The marriage between my father and mother was an arranged marriage. They were never happy 

The marriage between my older cousin and his wife was a love marriage. They're extremely happy. 

Just because somebody doesn't divorce doesn't automatically mean that the marriage is doing well 

 

I see thousands of Indian men stuck in arrange marriages flocking online to flirt with younger women, often times cheating on their wives and expressing their displeasure in their marriages and whining how they married only because of their parents. 

Not a very happy picture I say where the wife doesn't know what the husband is doing behind her back!! 

 

[Akemrelax]

20 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Biggest bias. The marriage between my father and mother was an arranged marriage. They were never happy 

The marriage between my older cousin and his wife was a love marriage. They're extremely happy. 

Just because somebody doesn't divorce doesn't automatically mean that the marriage is doing well 

 

I see thousands of Indian men stuck in arrange marriages flocking online to flirt with younger women, often times cheating on their wives and expressing their displeasure in their marriages and whining how they married only because of their parents. 

Not a very happy picture I say where the wife doesn't know what the husband is doing behind her back!! 

 

Don’t know what you’re on about.

I know many successful arranged marriages, even among younger generations.

They don’t have to suck if done the right way. What you’re describing is forced marriage. The husband wouldn’t cheat if he wasn’t forced into it. 

[Preety_India]

9 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

Don’t know what you’re on about.

I know many successful arranged marriages, even among younger generations.

They don’t have to suck if done the right way. What you’re describing is forced marriage. The husband wouldn’t cheat if he wasn’t forced into it. 

Haha what a joke.

 

[tsuki]

@electroBeam Could you list some aspects of romantic relationships that you consider to be not survival based?