How to choose where to live, and other decisions

[Superfluo]

Hi there!

For most of my life I've been living in one city, since I was born. For most of my life I've been around the same people I grew up with (generally speaking).

But now I'm opening my eyes to new possibilities, like moving to a different city, take a certain job just to explore, travel to a new place or country solo, forming new friendships and relationships, embracing other souls with the glance of your deepest love.

But in this moment I'm feeling angst because there are so many choices I could make. There is a whole world to explore, and I'm afraid of exploring it because I know I and it won't reach an end, and I could loose time, money and relationships if I explore as I'd like.

For most of my life I've been mostly in my head, and now I feel ready to be more grounded, more down to earth, more in touch with reality. And sometimes it feels too much.

How do you choose where to live, given that there could be millions of places that could be your next home?

These thoughts apply also to other areas of life.

How do you savor new places and experiences? How do you find your partner?

What if, in the middle of your career, you have to change everything just to experience a little more of this world, and you lose everything?

How do you know when you found your home, your place?

Online I see people doing all sort of things, I see all sorts of passions, all sorts of activities, all sort of relationships, all sorts of job, all sorts of ideas, and I feel overwhelmed by how many things there are out there, and how little time I have to decide the direction of my life.

Then I think: "What if you couldn't ever find what you seek anyway?"

Then I would settle, or I would make a logical choice to maximize the benefits. But this answer doesn't satisfy me, and is not based on emotions and love and intuition.

These videos that came to my mind express really well this feeling (short videos):

How do you deal with this existential challenge?

Any advice or personal anecdote or whatever is appreciated. 

 

 

Edited November 5, 2020 by Superfluo

[NatureB]

I am currently planning a big move for next year. Here is my plan:

Visit cities in my country and a few outside like Brazil and India, then make a decision. I plan on visiting a new city for 2-3 days every 2-3 weeks since that is what I can get a way with at my job.

Conversely I may quit my job and blitz different cities, then decide. Don't decide without having visited the place.

 

And stop pondering those dumb questions. They are just your worries, and realistically you won't answer them by thinking but by doing.

[Superfluo]

1 hour ago, NatureB said:

realistically you won't answer them by thinking but by doing.

That's what I'm planning to do too 

[Ima Freeman]

Your way of seeking may be a little bit confused. You want to find some place or some people who will let you feel great. But isn't it true, that we feel great when we are healthy and doing constructive work on our selfs?

If you let the outside world decide how you feel you may end up compulsively hunt for pleasures, which could lead to frustration and mental suffering.

A wiser way, in my opinion, would be to think of what is beneficial for you. What city, what people, what kind of food, what kind of sport, etc. But just at one change at a time so you don't alienate yourself from your past tendencies.