The relationship with one of my exes ended last year. Currently I'm in a stable relationship with a good guy. But I still have flashbacks of whatever happened in my past relationship with this abusive guy. He was emotionally and physically abusive.  He was a total narcissist pig.  I want to be able to let go whatever hurt he caused me. I don't want his thoughts. But these thoughts always come to my mind when I'm having free time or if I'm in a pensive mood.  I want to forget and forgive him and just move on, on an emotional plane and not remain stuck in thinking about all the hurt and pain he caused me.  Sometimes I get strong emotions of rage and anger and throwing objects at a wall or crying for hours under my pillow. I get this deep grudge like I want him punished in some way, some karma that should happen to him as a way of retribution for what he did to me.  I constantly feel like he didn't deserve me or the relationship and so he must pay in some way for me to feel that it was a fair game.  What are some thoughts that will help me deal with the above range of emotions and psyches I'm experiencing currently?