How do you accepting that Life is Unfair?

[BoyinParis]

I have struggled with accepting the fact that life is unfair. Of course, I know that it is. But accepting it has been a challenge. In fact, not being able to accept it has destroyed my faith and created deep anger within me. I have yet to find an answer or response that has been able to help me. Please help!!!

Edited November 1, 2020 by BoyinParis

[Megan Alecia]

Do something that you love, keep doing that.. Make sure it comes out of you. 

Find things you love and fill your life with those. 

That's prob as good as it gets. 

Edited November 1, 2020 by Megan Alecia

[Bando]

@BoyinParis You recongnize that people will always have it better than you and people will always have it worse, so you choose to live your own life. If you live in a first world country, with internet, in a relatively safe neighborhood, a decent family and don't have to worry about if you're eating that week you should be asking, "why do I have it easy compared to others" Think on that for a little. Always strive to live life based on your direct experience not what your mind is drumming up, if you don't like it do something about it.

[Megan Alecia]

You may find this video uplifting. 

[Nthnl]

3 hours ago, BoyinParis said:

I have struggled with accepting the fact that life is unfair. Of course, I know that it is. But accepting it has been a challenge. In fact, not being able to accept it has destroyed my faith and created deep anger within me. I have yet to find an answer or response that has been able to help me. Please help!!!

Fairness is a matter of subjective. It's neither fair nor unfair. At times things will happen in a way you find favorable (fair), and other times it will happen in a way you find unfavorable (unfair). Simply depends who you are and what you want to happen. It's not some universal principal that bad things will happen to you. It's simply a matter of how you look at the things that happen to you.

[commie]

4 hours ago, BoyinParis said:

In fact, not being able to accept it has destroyed my faith and created deep anger within me. I have yet to find an answer or response that has been able to help me.

How about aiming this anger according to its purpose? Being angry at life serves no purpose. It's not life as such that's unfair. Be specific and use that anger. Once it has accomplished its purpose, you may find you don't need it anymore.

[JosephKnecht]

What if life is actually fair? 

What if you consider it being unfair because you take a limited perspective on small aspects of life? Of course, there are dumb people who are richer than you, evil people who are happier than you, beautiful people who are more famous than you, but do you truly know the life of these people who you perceive to be unfairly living better lives than you? I bet you don't truly know this.

What if you drop your limited perspective and adopt an unlimited perspective and realize that everyone gets what they deserve. Can you accept the fact that you are getting exactly what you deserve? Can you accept that fairness exists?

I am not saying that that is the case. I am only asking What if...

[Elham]

Do not look at things as fair and unfair. Look at them as challenges... everybody is presented with their specific challenges. Everybody is required to overcome theirs. 

And if u think somebody else's is much easier (or fair) than yours, then know that they are YOU. So their fair or unfair challenges is also yours.

[Shin]

Lise is only unfair until the moment you realize everything that goes "wrong" is an opportunity to increase your consciousness.

Like Elham said, it's about seeing challenges rather than shit hitting the fan, and those challenges are there because life is all about evolving and discovering new things.
When you refuse to see life as an evolutionary process, everything that is out of your comfort zone is seen as a threat, as something that must be eliminated or confined.

But if you sit silently for a hour and ask "what is this pain is trying to tell me", you'd understand that you have to change something fundamental about your life.

You just don't do that because it feels very uncomfortable and painful, which is very instinctive and natural.

But you know, you don't treat a wound by feeling good, there is gonna be blood and pain first.
Now you could just ignore the wound and put a bandage on it to cover it up.
Except if you do that, then you'll be infected, and your body is gonna get more and more vulnerable and weak.

The same goes for your mind, the wound is the psychological judgment about whatever you feel injustice about, the bandage is the justification and blaming you think about certain people or events (or you), and the infection is more and more difficulty to enjoy life, to be at peace and happy.

 

Listen to the Wisdom of the deceased Master Yogi Bob Ross:

 

 

Edited November 1, 2020 by Shin

[aurum]

15 hours ago, BoyinParis said:

I have struggled with accepting the fact that life is unfair. Of course, I know that it is. But accepting it has been a challenge. In fact, not being able to accept it has destroyed my faith and created deep anger within me. I have yet to find an answer or response that has been able to help me. Please help!!!

What specifically feels unfair about life to you?

[BoyinParis]

 

31 minutes ago, aurum said:

What specifically feels unfair about life to you?

I don't even know where to start with that question. However, I will say that for some - their lives are full of pain and suffering and then they die, and for others - life is fucking banquet. So what's the lesson/purpose in that? And not only for those who experience both ends of the spectrum, but for those of us who witness this gross inequity?

[BoyinParis]

3 hours ago, datamonster said:

@BoyinParis What would it take for life to be perfectly fair according to you?

Again....so many places to start with that questions....however, I guess we could start with good people not suffering. Then children and babies not dying with unfulfilled dreams and "assholes" not living until they are 80 to 100 years old.  And that's just to start.  (*Please excuse my language, but that's just how I am triggered in this area.)

[BoyinParis]

 

4 hours ago, JosephKnecht said:

What if life is actually fair? 

What if you consider it being unfair because you take a limited perspective on small aspects of life? Of course, there are dumb people who are richer than you, evil people who are happier than you, beautiful people who are more famous than you, but do you truly know the life of these people who you perceive to be unfairly living better lives than you? I bet you don't truly know this.

What if you drop your limited perspective and adopt an unlimited perspective and realize that everyone gets what they deserve. Can you accept the fact that you are getting exactly what you deserve? Can you accept that fairness exists?

I am not saying that that is the case. I am only asking What if...

What are the "big aspects of life?" Because I rank happiness and love at that top (among others), and there are "good people" who don't get either of those aspects and then they die, and there are others who get multiple opportunities at both despite having done NOTHING to deserve that privilege. 

[BoyinParis]

@Megan Alecia Thanks....I found this video very interesting. 

[Gesundheit]

There's no difference. It's inevitable.

[Ethos]

Life it's not fair if you perceive it as something you would like instead. Try to practice allign your expectations with how life is, and you will find peace. Taoism helped me with this, the observance of nature that is.

[Mu_]

On 10/31/2020 at 8:45 PM, BoyinParis said:

I have struggled with accepting the fact that life is unfair. Of course, I know that it is. But accepting it has been a challenge. In fact, not being able to accept it has destroyed my faith and created deep anger within me. I have yet to find an answer or response that has been able to help me. Please help!!!

Unfair according to what measurement?  In your momentary opinion, in the opinion of those you learned from? 

Consider if this fundamental position actually isn't true, like if you looked at the dictionary of life and it didn't have this definition.  What then, what would there be that would need to be accepted about life being unfair?

Can you see how this idea, just may be an idea that you suffer around and struggle to deal with, when in fact there is no definition or truth that lines up with your belief about unfairness?

[EternalForest]

Life is only unfair because we as a society collectively make it so. It's not inherently this way. Life is inherently beautiful. So instead of thinking "Life is unfair", you should say "Society is unfair".