Game is not good for long term relationships (video)

[Raze]

(this speaker is not affiliated with the 21 convention, he was just a guest speaker)

Edited October 30, 2020 by Raze

[Origins]

Short story time

(Enjoy @Raze hopefully something to learn from here)

Imagine you're an alien observing the social activities of humans from a spaceship just outside of Earth. You notice all of the various kinds of intelligence that each type of demographic has about their own sex versus the opposite sex and everything in between, some have very primitive views, some increasingly more complex, some have have strict dichotomies, others have nuanced landscapes. You watch this all unfold inside your binoculars of time, this certain pair of binoculars allow you to not only zoom in as far as you want but to also replay social events as you please as well as go backwards and forwards in time. This is because time does not exist from the perspective that your species experiences existence, describing its dimensions is not fit for linguistic description due to its hyper nuanced structure that is beyond language. Inspecting the various sexes you see from the very beginning of human civilisation right up to this point how from a young age every adolescent wondered about their sexual preference and how to bridge the distance between their affections and receiving affection back. 

"These humans" you'd say

"They perceive each other as images on their lenses, this activates parts of their brain which then releases hormones to promote arousal which is potentially followed by oxytocin to promote courtship and even a possible relationship between each other."

"They don't know they're just images on their lenses, its very intriguing. They're not aware of the inner game that's being played inside their biology about the other sex, all that concerns them, quite abruptly, is how to quench this thirst that is now aching inside of them that their biology is trying to get them to fulfil."

You'd ponder about the complex interplay between chemical actions and stories that would be created to justify the chemical feelings and you'd sit for years on end on [which to you is experienced as mere microseconds due to the different experience of time ] your hyper advanced reclining chair wondering about how humans managed to confuse the narratives they created themselves and the narratives that were spread between each other about one another. This you'd explain as the reason why various groups about the sexes, like feminism and MGTOW were created, the inability to properly discriminate between inner and outer narratives, chemical precursors and the narratives that were consequentially invented in the brain.

After compartmentalising all of your data, you call the mothership and say that you've uncovered everything there is to know about human social relationships and now you know how to seduce a female woman you now plan on abducting from Earth in your spaceship "the humans" as you say, will record in their archive as either an unidentified flying object or an unidentified flying object that happened to also be spotted around the same time a female disappeared. Of course, because this alien hasn't properly understood what makes a female attractive, the alien chooses the fattest female out of logic, they believe that she'll, in your words as the alien, "be able to hold more children thus be a better mother to the alien hybrids".

Lessons you've personally learned from this short story composed on the fly:

1. Blank (your own private thoughts here don't need to be shared)
2. Blank (your own private thoughts here don't need to be shared)
3. Etc

 

 

[Applegarden]

@Origins dude, you are just too good for this forum.

[RendHeaven]

I think the 21 convention is total horseshit, but that talk was very useful for me lol

[Origins]

You've now been blocked @Keyhole. Not offended haha, just annoyingly weird and well yeah, I've got better things to do with my time. I've only ever visited the journal section once and that was over a month ago now.

Obviously you've just been triggered by something I've said but that's your responsibility to take care of. Best there, and probably best not to derail this thread mods hopefully can handle Keyhole here if they're paying attention, I'm not going to bug them about it though.

[Leo Gura]

It's not a question of game vs relationship, but both. The game is there to help you create leads for your relationships. Since most guys struggle to even get a quality girl to sleep with them at all.

Obviously game will not carry your relationship. You must build relationship skills on top of your game. The game is there as a safety net in case the relationship doesn't work out so you can find a new relationship.

Yes, there is definitely an under-emphasis of relationship skills among PUAs. This is a problem. Many PUAs aren't serious about relationships because they have intimacy issues and just want to be playboys.

[Origins]

@Leo Gura is it possible to create a setting where Keyhole can no longer see my posts and vice versa on a permanent level (like no ability to access either)? That would make this process sooooooo much easier.

Please do something about this though. And Keyhole stop this. Look into yourself. Enough with the projection.

[Origins]

Ever heard of personal boundaries @Keyhole, yeah I'd look into that. Same with projection. Please if we're going to talk this through let's keep this to one thread. I'm giving you a chance though to make your case so we can clear this up once and for all, I want the best for both of us in this situation. Let's bring the evidence to light.

[AtmoShark]

I hate these kinds of threads, where users like @Raze just plop down a video that's over an hour long on us and demand that we discuss it. No summary of the video, no timestamps or comments beyond a vague title. Do you honestly expect us to spend 8% of our waking hours today to review this video and say something intelligent about it?

This leads to users like @Origins posting absolutely bizarre shit that isn't practical or relevant to the topic at hand.

If you're a guy and you're interested in learning dating success, there are forums available out there that are full of people who are actualized and do not engage in the action these two dummies are. You might have to pay for some, and others are private and require invites.

[Karmadhi]

@Leo Gura Ironic considering that the most successful guys with girls fail at giving them what they truly want. A normal guy could be better at giving girls what they truly want which is deep emotional intimacy but the Pick up artists are the people that get the most girls. Quite a paradox

[Leo Gura]

3 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura A normal guy could be better at giving girls what they truly want which is deep emotional intimacy but the Pick up artists are the people that get the most girls. Quite a paradox

This is actually a misunderstanding of the situation.

What girls love is the emotional stimulation. Not just the highs but the lows. Girls love drama. And the PUA learns how to build that drama for her and push all her buttons. This makes her fall mad in love. The normal guy is more stable and vanilla and it's just not that exciting for girls. The girl will accept it, but she will not fall madly in love because it's just too vanilla. It lacks the edge, the adventure, the thrill, the emotion, the highs, the lows.

One of the biggest eye-openers in game is when you realize that girls love negative emotional stimulation and the crazy emotional roller-coaster.

This is why PUAs get laid like crazy. They get extremely good at creating that emotional roller-coaster for the girl.

A girl is to emotional stimulation as a moth is to light. And they both end up burned by it in the end.

The paradox is that emotional drama and negative emotions create rapid, deep intimacy more so than being a vanilla nice guy. The vanilla nice usually can't build as deep an intimacy as the PUA, even though the PUA may dump the girl the next night.

[Akemrelax]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Girls love drama

As a guy I hate that. I can’t even stand drama on the screen let alone my life. Equanimity over emotions for me.

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

As a guy I hate that. I can’t even stand drama on the screen let alone my life. Equanimity over emotions for me.

This is why the best advice for getting ridiculously good with girls is simply this: become more of a girl yourself.

That is the secret key. You must train yourself to be more emotional than the girl, yet still fully in control and grounded.

The James Bond stereotype is exactly wrong for pickup. Be more like a gay drama queen.

One minute you are laughing, the next minute you are angry, the next minute you are crying, the next minute you are romantic, the next minute you are dirty, the next minute are shouting vulgarities, the next minute you are giggling like a little girl. << this makes the girl mesmerized

You want to expand your emotional range a lot so that you are completely non-logical and unpredictable. Like a fox

Your typical guy is logical like Data from StarTrek. It's the worst possible thing for game.

[Akemrelax]

11 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

This is why the best advice for getting ridiculously good with girls is simply this: become more of a girl yourself.

That is the secret key. You must train yourself to be more emotional than the girl, yet still fully in control and grounded.

The James Bond stereotype is exactly wrong for pickup. Be more like a gay drama queen.

One minute you are laughing, the next minute you are angry, the next minute you are crying, the next minute you are romantic, the next minute you are dirty, the next minute are shouting vulgarities, the next minute you are giggling like a little girl. << this makes the girl mesmerized

You want to expand your emotional range a lot so that you are completely non-logical and unpredictable. Like a fox

Your typical guy is logical like Data from StarTrek. It's the worst possible thing for game.

But Leo, this interferes with being mindful. Being mindful naturally makes me a stable non-emotional person. And not to mention I need to be a stable person to do well in the real world. Can’t have all these ups and downs and still perform well at work.

 

[Leo Gura]

2 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

Being mindful naturally makes me a stable non-emotional person.

That's your limited conception of mindfulness.

If you don't know how to throw a wild party, your enlightenment isn't complete.

You been watching too much Rupert Spira and Eckhart Tolle.

[Shin]

3 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

But Leo, this interferes with being mindful. Being mindful naturally makes me a stable non-emotional person. And not to mention I need to be a stable person to do well in the real world. Can’t have all these ups and downs and still perform well at work.

 

Then how come women perform well at work ?

They are wild, unpredictable and go from anger to love  in 1 second lol

[Akemrelax]

5 minutes ago, Shin said:

Then how come women perform well at work ?

From my understanding women who perform well are stable people.

[PenguinPablo]

@Leo Gura how is this different than trauma bonding?

addiction to stress and abusive childhood, leading us to try to recreate the same shitty dynamics in real life, instead of pursuing peace?

[Akemrelax]

I’m sure there are women out there who find Eckart Tolle and Rupert Spira “attractive”. Right women?

[Shin]

17 minutes ago, Akemrelax said:

I’m sure there are women out there who find Eckart Tolle and Rupert Spira “attractive”. Right women?

You don't know how Eckart Tolle or Rupert Spira are outside of a public speaking.

I would bet they are more playful than you think with their wives ?

The most authentic men I met so far were all capable to let lose and jump to one emotion to the next.

It's like cocaine for women, and it feels amazingly freeing for you too ?

Edited November 2, 2020 by Shin