Ego deconstruction, when is the right time?

[SaltyMeatballs]

Im 24. At this stage I feel like my time needs to be utilized towards escaping wage slavery and working on my relationship skills (something Ive neglected quite alot). I've been meditating for about 3-4 years now. However, I feel that there is an issue with spirituality which is rarely talked about... 

Firstly, despite all the benefits, I feel like meditation (or spirituality in general) has to be practiced at the right time relative to one's own position on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Becoming too detached from outcome and therefore less driven to achieve goals does you no good if your basic survival needs are not met.  

When I practice meditation I usually become detached from something I thought was important and so goes my discipline with it. I'm less motivated to go chase girls, pursue business and so on which is exactly what I need. I feel like there is an empty void which needs to be filled before I can deconstruct my ego. 

I guess my main concern is that I don't want to lose the benefits of pursuing spirituality but at the same time I want to be driven towards pursuing my goals. What is the correct approach for this? 

In addition, I'm finding it extremely hard to connect with people who are at lower stages of development, especially the conformist and achiever types. 

I am wondering what peoples thoughts are on this. 

[Nahm]

34 minutes ago, SaltyMeatballs said:

Im 24. At this stage I feel like my time needs to be utilized towards escaping wage slavery and working on my relationship skills (something Ive neglected quite alot). I've been meditating for about 3-4 years now. However, I feel that there is an issue with spirituality which is rarely talked about... 

The ‘issue’ is the neglect you mentioned, not ‘this other thing’ “spirituality”. 

If I wanted a hamburger, would you suggest I focus on a hamburger, or an ego?

If I wanted to feel my absolute best, what would I focus on?

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Firstly, despite all the benefits, I feel like meditation (or spirituality in general) has to be practiced at the right time relative to one's own position on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Becoming too detached from outcome and therefore less driven to achieve goals does you no good if your basic survival needs are not met.  

Becoming attached to outcome and therefore less driven to achieve goals also does you no good if your basic needs are not met. 

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When I practice meditation I usually become detached from something I thought was important and so goes my discipline with it. I'm less motivated to go chase girls, pursue business and so on which is exactly what I need. I feel like there is an empty void which needs to be filled before I can deconstruct my ego. 

It is difficult from that perspective of need. That perspective is about yourself, not the ‘things’. More accurately, you want to have sex, relationships, and income. ‘Listen’ to the feeling which is the wanting, the desire. Enjoy the desire, wether you have the things or not. That is the real fun, the aliveness. 

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I guess my main concern is that I don't want to lose the benefits of pursuing spirituality but at the same time I want to be driven towards pursuing my goals. What is the correct approach for this? 

A dreamboard, because a dream is the only possible situation in which there is wanting. ?

If your perspective doesn’t feel good, let it go in meditation. 

If you no longer want to experience perspectives that don’t feel good, meditate each morning, first thing. 

Perspective is one liquid, not little individual solids. 

“Be like water my friend”. - Bruce Lee

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In addition, I'm finding it extremely hard to connect with people who are at lower stages of development, especially the conformist and achiever types. 

I am wondering what peoples thoughts are on this. 

It’s because you hold the belief they’re at lower stages of development than “you”. Without that belief in your superiority, they’re exactly the same as you, in that we can all hold beliefs & judge. Without judging “them”, there is no “you”, judging them, there is no You. 

“It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways.” 
― Siddhārtha Gautama

[Shin]

No, you can do both, just heavily focus on what you think you need to grow practically on.

Just meditate 20 minutes a day, and walk in the forest or something for about 30 minutes everyday without any distraction.

 

You're basically saying

"I prefer to stay insane for 20 more years and suffer everytime something doesn't go my way, because xyz says that it's in the xyz stage that spirituallity should start".

"I prefer to focus on xyz now, so I can start being happier later !"

Realize the stupidity of those sentences  

Edited October 22, 2020 by Shin

[The0Self]

There is no downside to continuing your meditation practice. Just do an hour first thing in the morning or something. It just makes everything else easier. No need to get obsessed with it. Just do it.

[electroBeam]

14 minutes ago, SaltyMeatballs said:

Im 24. At this stage I feel like my time needs to be utilized towards escaping wage slavery and working on my relationship skills (something Ive neglected quite alot). I've been meditating for about 3-4 years now. However, I feel that there is an issue with spirituality which is rarely talked about... 

Firstly, despite all the benefits, I feel like meditation (or spirituality in general) has to be practiced at the right time relative to one's own position on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Becoming too detached from outcome and therefore less driven to achieve goals does you no good if your basic survival needs are not met.  

When I practice meditation I usually become detached from something I thought was important and so goes my discipline with it. I'm less motivated to go chase girls, pursue business and so on which is exactly what I need. I feel like there is an empty void which needs to be filled before I can deconstruct my ego. 

I guess my main concern is that I don't want to lose the benefits of pursuing spirituality but at the same time I want to be driven towards pursuing my goals. What is the correct approach for this? 

In addition, I'm finding it extremely hard to connect with people who are at lower stages of development, especially the conformist and achiever types. 

I am wondering what peoples thoughts are on this. 

Not to boast or anything, just for another perspective, I got onto this path in college, dropped out of college, had 2 jobs (a very stressful startup part time and a very stressful full time job) for 3 years straight, and did this path hardcore. Then realised my college and 2 jobs and everyone around me was me. 

And if it wasn't for my job, my spiritual path wouldn't have taken off, because it was the experience of my very stressful job, breaking up with my long term GF, which pulled the inner demons out of me. I nearly committed suicide 3 times after dropping out of college, 1 time my startup nearly failed, girlfriend broke up with me, and I lost my job(was living by myself because parents were disappointed that I dropped out of college and kicked me out). A day after that experience, I had a huge awakening, and was very very receptive to a whole new way of looking at the world, and also to a certain new teaching that the mod above exposed me to. 

There's no better opportunity to really see what hidden karma you have inside of you then to go through demoralisation, ridicule, nearly loosing your job, depression, anxiety and loads of fear. 

This path has never been a separate thing to my career or relationships, and I've never understood why people see it that way, maybe there's a very good reason for it, but your career (if it really pushes you) just compliments your practices and helps you deconstruct yourself.

If I didn't have a very stressful life, I'm over 9000% sure my spiritual journey would have been 3 years behind it is now. Because I wouldn't have had the opportunity to really test what I'm made of. 

[KaRzual]

@electroBeam hey bro i'd love to hear more about your awakening.