Stop chasing women and start attracting them into your life

[Thestarguitarist14]

I see this thing that most men (particularly men who are getting into pick up) do which is they are chasing women.

 

They go out to bars and clubs (can’t really do that right now), they day game, they go out after work, they do online dating, dating apps, etc.  

 

How about creating a lifestyle that attracts women?

 

I have been contemplating lately and what I have realized is this: I am an artist who is not a millionaire (yet) who also lives in Los Angeles.  Most women date me on potential at best, but do not see a ton of value in me outside of that and my looks (I’m no Chad, but I do have some endorsement deals from clothing lines).  I have gotten into this situation where the woman discarded me or even ghosted me, I show some cool shit that I am doing on Instagram, they regret it and stalk me on there a bit, but it is far too late as I don’t play those games.

 

What I have realized is instead of chasing women, if I focus on myself, my lifestyle will bring them in. 
 

You have to get yourself out if this runner chaser dynamic.  A lot of women these days (especially in major cities) want to be chased because all they want is attention.  
 

How about you get her and other to chase you?

 

How do you go about this?  Take a few months off from pursuing women.  It is not the end world my desperados.  Women will always be there.  But you can use this time to start a business, get into shape, heal, read,  become more spiritual and overall love yourself, raise your self esteem and feel better about yourself.  You have to understand that no woman is going to make you feel better about yourself.  That is an inside job.  And self live is far from attractive than this self loathing that a lot of guys get into.

Fast forward a few months later, you will have new clothes, you will be detached from women and actually feel free.  When you do go out you will only approach women who give you choosing signals and not this cold approach nonsense (which is necessary for noobies, but is ultimately not effective).  You will tolerate less b.s and meet more women who are willing to put in some work.

At the end of the day, most of you guys make minimum wage, have shit jobs and are depressed.  Then you wonder why women give you these shit tests.  Imagine if you had a business, we’re making $4,000 a month, got yourself a nice apartment, a new car and new clothes.  The things do not matter.  They are simply outer manifestations of you changing yourself.  Then of course women would treat you differently.

How does that sound?

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Preety_India]

Better 

Let women approach. No drama no fuss. Women will get the men they want that fit their needs. All this chasing is fruitless 

 

 

 

[Recursoinominado]

You have to approach, this lifestyle thing  only really works if you are a celebrity or do some kind of work that naturally attracts hordes of women all the time like promoters.

To most guys, you will have to approach if you want true abundance. Otherwise you will have to settle with what the universe brings to you and, chances are, this will not be enough.

Stop with the racionalization and just approach, there is no way around it.

[Thestarguitarist14]

34 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

You have to approach, this lifestyle thing  only really works if you are a celebrity or do some kind of work that naturally attracts hordes of women all the time like promoters.

To most guys, you will have to approach if you want true abundance. Otherwise you will have to settle with what the universe brings to you and, chances are, this will not be enough.

Stop with the racionalization and just approach, there is no way around it.

I never said to not approach women.  Though I have been approached by some attractive women.  Dated one for a few months who did most of the initial pursuing.  

What I am saying is to stop chasing women.  Only approach women who give you choosing signals.  Then, the women are the ones who are approaching you.  They are making it easier for you.  Versus cold approaching women who see you as nothing and have to make a snap judgement.  The problem is most guys are not attractive enough to get choosing signals and have to cold approach.  If you became more attractive, you would notice that more women are throwing “looks” your way more often.

True abundance comes from within.  To manifest true abundance you have to manifest an abundance personality.  Have the finer qualities of personality like authenticity, honesty, sincerity and etc.

 

So you can “just approach”, play the numbers game and get lucky.  Or you can create a lifestyle that draws women in.  That in itself is actually much more work.  But will yield more results.  And is much more fulfilling than pick.  Will also give you more confidence.  Though, it is better if you can gain confidence without having to make money from a business.

 

At the end of the day, cold approaching is a waste of time.  Nine times out of ten you are approaching women who are throwing no choosing signals your way.  Women who are not attracted to you. Then you have to display value and do this dancing monkey act that most guys get into.  Then you get into this whole thing where you get jerked around by the woman and you wonder why?  She was never really attracted to you in the first place.

As men, we consciously go for the best cups.  The most attractive women.  This is because unconsciously we are seeking their approval and validation.  When in fact there are always women giving choosing signals.  They are just not women that you are attracted to.  So if you desire those types of women that you dream of, it comes at bettering yourself,

All I am saying is to value yourself more and create a lifestyle that draws women into you.  You do not have to be a celebrity.  Just have a good Instagram account, start a business, buy new clothes. Those three things alone will be enough.

 

But more importantly, change who you are on the inside.  That is what will make you more attractive.

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Preety_India]

10 minutes ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

True abundance comes from within.  To manifest true abundance you have to manifest an abundance personality.  Have the finer qualities of personality like authenticity, honesty, sincerity and etc.

I agree with this 

[Recursoinominado]

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

 Though I have been approached by some attractive women.  Dated one for a few months who did most of the initial pursuing.  

Yeah, bad idea to wait to get approached like a girl.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

They are making it easier for you.

Of course, that's what you want with this horrible mindset.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Versus cold approaching women who see you as nothing and have to make a snap judgement.

Fear of rejection? Hmm what could you do about it? I don't know, it's a mystery. Maybe ignore it and turn completely passive, that will solve it.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

 The problem is most guys are not attractive enough to get choosing signals and have to cold approach.

I am very attractive but it is VERY rare that a high-quality woman approaches me. 

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

True abundance comes from within.  To manifest true abundance you have to manifest an abundance personality.  Have the finer qualities of personality like authenticity, honesty, sincerity and etc.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

So you can “just approach”, play the numbers game and get lucky.

It is a skill, not luck.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Or you can create a lifestyle that draws women in.

Do it, but also approach.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

 But will yield more results.

Not by itself, unless you are a celebrity, promoter or something like that.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

At the end of the day, cold approaching is a waste of time.

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

 Women who are not attracted to you.

Attraction takes time, it is not a binary thing, stop assuming women think like men.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Then you have to display value and do this dancing monkey act that most guys get into.

Only if you lack skill.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Then you get into this whole thing where you get jerked around by the woman and you wonder why?  She was never really attracted to you in the first place.

Again, attraction takes time, it is not a binary thing, stop assuming women think like men.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

As men, we consciously go for the best cups.  The most attractive women.  This is because unconsciously we are seeking their approval and validation.

Not necessarily. If you want the approval of an attractive female, she won't like you

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

When in fact there are always women giving choosing signals.

Yeah, like 10% of what you could get or less. Some women suck at flirting, some put a bitchy face, some just don't notice you, it is just bad strategy to wait for them to give you signals first.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

They are just not women that you are attracted to.  So if you desire those types of women that you dream of, it comes at bettering yourself,

Let's say that you are an 9 in the attractive scale. Maybe a 7 will approach you, an 8 will give you signals and a 9 will play hard to get, a 10 maybe won't even look at you. In order for a 10 approach you, you have to be like a 12 (celebrity, superstar or something). Good luck turning into a 12.

4 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Then you wonder why women give you these shit tests.

Why are you afraid of shit tests? They are FUN! It's part of flirting, stop wanting women to throw themselves at you, this is disrespectful at best.

 

3 hours ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

All I am saying is to value yourself more and create a lifestyle that draws women into you.

Yeah, of course, but approach anyway, there is no substitute to approaching.

 

All i see in your posts is: I AM TERRIBLE AFRAID OF NOT BEING ENOUGH AND BEING REJECTED. 

This just shows a pitiful lack of masculine energy. Imagine a super alpha male with this passive approach to life, waiting to get approached by women in order to not get rejected to protect his little weak ego.

Just approach, stop whining. 

[Thestarguitarist14]

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Yeah, bad idea to wait to get approached like a girl.

 

First off, she came out of no where.  Was in the middle of the day, and I was not looking for anything.  Secondly, you got to be rather attractive for women to approach you straight up as they never do.

 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Of course, that's what you want with this horrible mindset.

 

Why would I want things to be harder?

 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

Fear of rejection? Hmm what could you do about it? I don't know, it's a mystery. Maybe ignore it and turn completely passive, that will solve it.

 

You are just projecting here.  I was a straight up pick up artist for nearly three years.  Three years of cold approaching.  I don’t give a fuck about some randomness woman rejecting me.  It’s selection, not rejection.  This is about maximizing your efforts.

 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

I am very attractive but it is VERY rare that a high-quality woman approaches me. 

 

You have to understand that what I mean by approaching are when women throw choosing signals at you.  Signs of initial attraction.  To women, that is their way of approaching you.  You approaching after this is just the woman allowing you to believe that you are making something happen.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

It is a skill, not luck.

 

Eh, it’s a numbers game.  Most women only date men in their social circle.

 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

.

Do it, but also approach.

 

I guess so.  But you will have very little value and just be messing around with women who don’t fuck with you.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

Attraction takes time, it is not a binary thing, stop assuming women think like men.

 

 

Yes, sometimes you do have to raise a woman’s attraction.  Maybe I am just past this stage, but why go for women who are going to make it harder on yourself when you can make yourself more attractive and therefore attract women who have a high level of interest?  If you truly value yourself as a man you would only go after a woman who has a high level of interest in you.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

Not necessarily. If you want the approval of an attractive female, she won't like you

 

Yup.  This is where most guys are at.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

Yeah, like 10% of what you could get or less. Some women suck at flirting, some put a bitchy face, some just don't notice you, it is just bad strategy to wait for them to give you signals first.

 

No it is not.  It’s called have a strategy that yields the highest results.  Again, this only works if you are attractive.  If you are not then it won’t be the case.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Let's say that you are an 9 in the attractive scale. Maybe a 7 will approach you, an 8 will give you signals and a 9 will play hard to get, a 10 maybe won't even look at you. In order for a 10 approach you, you have to be like a 12 (celebrity, superstar or something). Good luck turning into a 12.

I am way past looking at women like that.  I don’t care about looks so much as energy.

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Why are you afraid of shit tests? They are FUN! It's part of flirting, stop wanting women to throw themselves at you, this is disrespectful at best.

 

 

You have to be the first guy to say this.  Even alpha male strategies hates shit tests.  Nobody has got time for them.  The only good thing about shit tests are the woman is usually interested.

 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

 

Yeah, of course, but approach anyway, there is no substitute to approaching.

 

Eh, work on yourself for a few months, come back and see the difference.  
 

48 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

All i see in your posts is: I AM TERRIBLE AFRAID OF NOT BEING ENOUGH AND BEING REJECTED. 

This just shows a pitiful lack of masculine energy. Imagine a super alpha male with this passive approach to life, waiting to get approached by women in order to not get rejected to protect his little weak ego.

Just approach, stop whining. 

That is a very stage orange/achiever level/bro thing to say.

Who gives a fuck about being an alpha male? I consider myself a sigma (basically an introverted alpha male).  It is not about ego.  It is about seeing how chasing is futile.

You are actually like there is intrinsic value in cold approaching when there is none.  Trust me.  After years of doing it, I understand that.  

How about you try it for yourself?  Take a break from approaching (though idk how you are approaching right now) until 2021.  Just work on yourself.  Go and approach New Year’s Eve.  I bet you will have an easier go it at.

 

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Recursoinominado]

Dude, just go approach.

[Thestarguitarist14]

14 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Dude, just go approach.

Dude, just go attract. 
 

Let’s see who is more fulfilled.  Here is a hint. I am way happier than I was when I lived that sex drugs and rock and roll lifestyle.  It’s called growing up.

When you level up you will understand how limited your beliefs really are.

 

Also, you are just doing things the hard way.  But it’s okay, sone people learn through pain.

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Recursoinominado]

I am already attractive as fuck.

Do both.

[Thestarguitarist14]

17 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

I am already attractive as fuck.

Do both.

Okay, then why are you so focused on approaching?  Not sorry to never approach.  But a true high value male does not give a fuck about cold approaching.  Do you think done hot shot on Wall Street who makes $2 million a year gives a fuck about cold approaching?  

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

But a high value male does not give a fuck about cold approaching.  

 

?? The Comment of the Century in Dating 

???????

 

 

 

[Recursoinominado]

5 minutes ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Okay, then why are you so focused on approaching?

Freedom, abundance, choosing out of a bigger pool of women, not into lack of options or shitty relationships. DO BOTH.

6 minutes ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

 But a true high value male does not give a fuck about cold approaching.

Yeah, that's just wrong.

7 minutes ago, Thestarguitarist14 said:

Do you think done hot shot on Wall Street who makes $2 million a year gives a fuck about cold approaching?  

Probably in a shitty marriage or dating shitty women also.

[Preety_India]

 

Why will Brad Pitt cold approach? 

He is effing hot and attractive. 

Women will fall at his feet, all kinds of women. This is just true. 

 

Angelina Jolie fell for him 

Dude just needs to be present. And he gets the chicks. Even the hottest ones. 

He got Jennifer Aniston. 

And she couldn't let him go. 

The king only needs to be present. 

A hot attractive man doesn't need to do cold approaching. He will get laid anyway. Even with the best women. 

 

 

Edited October 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Recursoinominado]

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

Why will Brad Pitt cold approach? 

As i said, if you are a celebrity, you probably don't need to do cold approaches. 

But even then, there are lots of famous successful guys that SUCK at dating and have shitty relationships.

[Preety_India]

 

Just now, Recursoinominado said:

As i said, if you are a celebrity, you probably don't need to do cold approaches. 

But even then, there are lots of famous successful guys that SUCK at dating and have shitty relationships.

 

The OP has a very productive message for men. 

Not everyone is in a shitty relationship as you would want them too. 

A lot of men waste their lives chasing women and doing all this cold approaching. 

 

They could do a lot better if they invested in consciousness work and making themselves healthier and better.. 

He is right on many levels, 

Women are attracted to stable wonderful men, and if the guy can't deliver that, no matter how charming and attractive he is, it will lead to a shitty relationship,bwahahahahaha... There goes your illusion of cold approaches. 

The OP is experienced in the field of dating and PUA and relationships. 

He is not a struggling male anymore 

 

So he has earned a couple of lessons up his sleeve. 

If it doesn't resonate with you, that's fine, but he is not wrong, telling him to go cold approach is like telling a Pele to go make goals. 

Sorry but he knows what he is saying. 

 

 

[Thestarguitarist14]

18 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Freedom, abundance, choosing out of a bigger pool of women, not into lack of options or shitty relationships. DO BOTH.

 

Freedom=your happiness not be dictated by outer circumstances.

 

Abundance once again comes from within.  You can work as hard as you like, but you will never achieve abundance from the outside.  It all depends on what your definition of abundance is.  When I was young I thought that dating four women at one time meant true abundance.  I was wrong.  Shows where you are at.

 

If you have abundance from within then you already know that you can have any woman that you desire.

 

Only people who have of options or shitting relationships are people with lack mindsets.  You are stuck in conventional thinking.  I invite to realize that a lot of dating is really about inner work.  The results are just a manifestation of your inner work.

 

18 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Yeah, that's just wrong.

You see it as wrong because of your limited, unresourceful beliefs.  Pick up is only a stage in life.  I’m past it.  When will you be?  I mean if you just got started, I get it.  But no true high value make does pick up.  Pick up is meant for guys who have had trouble with with their whole lives.

 

18 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Probably in a shitty marriage or dating shitty women also.

And you date high quality women?

I bet when he goes out, tons of hot women give him choosing signals, a few will approach him, he’ll probably go over and talk to the most attractive woman who is giving him choosing signals and spend the night with her.  A lot easier.

Edited October 8, 2020 by Thestarguitarist14

[Recursoinominado]

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

The OP has a very productive message for men. 

Nah.

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

A lot of men waste their lives chasing women and doing all this cold approaching. 

Maybe 1% of men actually do cold approaches, not for the weak ones.

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

They could do a lot better if they invested in consciousness work and making themselves healthier and better.. 

As i said, do BOTH.

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

He is right on many levels, 

Nah.

4 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Women are attracted to stable wonderful men, and if the guy can't deliver that, no matter how charming and attractive he is, it will lead to a shitty relationship,bwahahahahaha... There goes your illusion of cold approaches. 

Wat?

4 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

The OP is experienced in the field of dating and PUA and relationships. 

Doesn't mean he is right, see all Leo's video about self-bias and self-deception.

5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

He is not a struggling male anymore 

Again, doesn't mean he is right, see all Leo's video about self-bias and self-deception.

7 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

but he is not wrong

Yes, he is.

7 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

telling him to go cold approach is like telling a Pele to go make goals. 

ahahahahahahahaha

7 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Sorry but he knows what he is saying. 

nah...

[ColeMC01]

@Recursoinominado How many girls do you need to approach to become good enough to get a 7/10 girl?

[ColeMC01]

@Preety_India LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

How do you think men are attractive? They are either good looking, high status, rich af or have good game. 

Looks are set in stone for most part

Social status and wealth need insane amount of work

Best thing is to just work on game after maxing your looks and making decent income. How do you assume people get the funny charismatic personality that makes you wet? Either they are naturals or they build it. They are called social skills for a reason. Skills can be developed. That is like saying training to play football is beta because messi doesnt train and still can play decently. Well if you are messi great, otherwise you re fucking if you dont train