Talking deep to people

[Saupahar]

i just feel like talking to people and make them understand the deep insights regarding everything they have not thought about so deeply.

It is just so exhausting to talk to people who just don't listen to whatever i am saying. But i can't help it. 

I think i keep on blabbing even though it is clearly visible that most of them are not interested in whatever i am saying. Nevertheless i continue and sometimes feel frustrated.

I want to help those who really ask for it and again i can't help it-i want to share what i know to make them understand what is going in their minds. I feel like it's waste of my energy.

Any advice??(i am asking for it?)

 

[Preety_India]

Accept that they don't accept your opinion.. 

 

Accept their rejection. 

 

 

[Tim R]

You're frustrated because you expect them to understand. Drop your expectations or at least regulate them to an appropriate level.

I could tell you about some deep insight I had - but neither would I expect you to understand nor would I be frustrated if you weren't even ready to use my insight as guidance. 

5 minutes ago, Saupahar said:

I want to help those who really ask for it

What do they ask for? You insights?

[Forestluv]

1 minute ago, Saupahar said:

I want to help those who really ask for it and again i can't help it-i want to share what i know to make them understand what is going in their minds. I feel like it's waste of my energy.

Observation, contemplation and nuanced thinking takes effort. Most minds don't want to put the effort in - especially if it isn't in their self interest - that can take things personally and get defensive.

At a self-centered personal level, a person needs to have some willingness and desire to look at itself. Usually the motivation is some type of personal gain or relief from suffering. For example, someone may have had lots of conflict in relationships and has always been blaming others - and never taking personal responsibility. If we bring this to the attention to an unwilling mind it will get defensive like "How dare you take their side!!". Yet if the person sees their situation as a problem and is getting tired of suffering, they may open up and start asking "Why do I keep getting into toxic relationships?". Yet a helper would still need to be gentle with this because the mind could easily snap into personal defense mode. We could take about what it would be like to be free of these toxic relationships and have a healthy relationship - that would be a stick.

As well, if someone has a baseline level of curiosity - it is far less threatening to point out dynamics of other people's minds (rather than their own). For example, we could say "Isn't it interesting how the mind is oriented toward blaming others - this prevents the mind from introspecting itself". This could seem far less threatening - yet it is still a step away. If the goal is to induce a realization, this would be much weaker medicine. The person could say "Yea, it's too bad those people blame others a lot. I'm glad I don't do that". 

[aurum]

4 hours ago, Saupahar said:

Any advice??(i am asking for it?)

Listening. Be curious about them and their opinion. If you want them to listen to you, this is the first step.

[Rigel]

Grasp relativity and you won't feel like imposing your views on other people.

Unless they ask for your limited and biased opinion just be.

There's also nothing wrong with sharing your thoughts with other people.

The thing that you want to say cannot be said tho it is your very being.

Just be maybe.

You can speak their language as long as you are grounded in being.

The vibe is way more useful than your clumsy dialect. They call it compassion I believe.

People also don't give a damn about what you say. Even if they ask your for advice they are going to listen and do exactly what you didn't say.

Even you yourself don't do what you preach ;)

[Saupahar]

@Tim R Yes, my insights but they rarely ask for it by themselves.

 

[Origins]

This is merely a cultural approximation (which would be of 2020 in your case of course). Determine the demographic and go from there, this is what scientists do before they label a sample within a microscope slide X or Y, they study it, if you're failing to adapt when you know its not a good learning strategy to be communicating in the way you're communicating to the length and qualities of the conversation then this is also an emotional intelligence project for yourself. It seems as though you're aware it's a social problem, so the issue isn't social intelligence it only seems like that because you're not tuning in with your emotions enough that you're grounded to what's happening. Back to the original demonstration, if you went back to the 1800's you wouldn't be talking about neuralace, if you went to a tribal village of todays times that's never even heard of the western world you wouldn't be trying to speak in English. It's all about making correct social distinctions and in your case also making good emotional distinctions within yourself to get to core beliefs and understandings about yourself that may need amending, healing, etc. Leo has a good video on making distinctions, after you learn that then its further progressing yourself in understanding social patterns better, so on and so fourth.

Edited October 8, 2020 by Origins

[kag101]

10 hours ago, Saupahar said:

I want to help those who really ask for it

This!

Share your experience with those who ask for your input.

You can't shove your "deep opinions" down other people's throat.

There are few types of people who are more annoying than those who try to be philosophical and deep all the time!