Higher Consciousness Turns Off? (Help)

[jayfrost321]

I'm asking for some experienced people to help me out, would be appreciated. I'm only 20 yrs old.

When I do self actualization work, I essentially starve my ego of all pointless pleasure and endure discomfort to better myself (NoFap, Gym, Eat Healthy, Meditation/Inner work) there seems to be 2 paths. Chase pleasure or chase Soul. (Lower vs Higher self/consciousness)

I had a small psilocybin experience a year ago where I tapped into a bigger consciousness above me that was like connected to all things. I was in pure 'beingness' and felt like I was God lol. I call it my higher self. This made me learn energy/duality and put me on the path to better myself. The past year my whole life has changed, from the people I hang around to the food I eat.

It's like a probe where I have my own little wee flesh/ego and it wants nothing but to survive and feel pleasure. Then, when I get on the self actualization path, (usually 2-3 weeks into NoFap) I unplug from my lower self and enter into my higher self. It's like my soul/true self. It's like I zoom out and see the big picture. I don't feel identified with my ego mind. I feel conscious, authentic, alive, love, fulfilled, free, connected to the universe, motivated and purposeful, soul) NoFap has been a huge deal for me and my path to actualizing myself (peeling back the onion)

My question is, is the following normal? Every time I reach this higher state, I end up plugging back into my ego mind and get off the path, just wanting pleasure, comfort, etc. Like I actually notice the transition from my higher self to my lower self it's kind of freaky. Like there's another whole inner world you can tap into. Is it possible to hold onto this higher state and not fall back down?

Also thanks Leo for your work.



 

[nistake]

1 minute ago, jayfrost321 said:

My question is, is the following normal? Every time I reach this higher state, I end up plugging back into my ego mind and get off the path, just wanting pleasure, comfort, etc. Like I actually notice the transition from my higher self to my lower self it's kind of freaky. Like there's another whole inner world you can tap into. Is it possible to hold onto this higher state and not fall back down?

This phenomenon is the ego backlash. It's normal and you can't avoid it, unfortunately. Have you seen Leo's video about it?

[jayfrost321]

14 minutes ago, nistake said:

This phenomenon is the ego backlash. It's normal and you can't avoid it, unfortunately. Have you seen Leo's video about it?

Interesting, I will watch that some time, thanks.

[Persipnei]

Yeah, it happens after each realization, and everytime you say "it won't happen this time, this time I'll see it coming" and then weeks or months later you realize you were that dumb egofollower again... Ego is very good in masking this shit, every time it looks and feels a bit different, so it's hard to recognize.

And then it starts all over again on a slightly higher level...