Isn't Pickup Unconscious?

[Sleyker]

15 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

So yeah, even a guy with my looks can attract hot girls. But it requires game. It ain't gonna happen "naturally".

Lol, I think you have good looks man, especially with the beard.

[Leo Gura]

5 minutes ago, vizual said:

I guess, I have been with an "instagram model" with 100k+ followers, never with an actual celebrity or "supermodel". But anyway, I don't really see the appeal. Just the fact that you have status, fame and money doesn't mean shit to me if you have a shitty personality. Does it really make you happy to "land" a supermodel? This has always confused me.

The context of this conversion was sleeping with a Leonardo De Caprio style guy. The female equivalent of which is a supermodel.

I personally have no interest in chasing down supermodels. I don't even go for 10s because they are not worth the hassle.

[vizual]

9 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

The context of this conversion was sleeping with a Leonardo De Caprio style guy. The female equivalent of which is a supermodel.

I personally have no interest in chasing down supermodels. I don't even go for 10s because they are not worth the hassle.

Yes, but the way you answered the question it seems that you think the goal of having a relationship with the opposite sex is to always have someone with the highest "sexual value".

From my perspective that's a load of bullshit.

[Thestarguitarist14]

18 minutes ago, vizual said:

Yes, but the way you answered the question it seems that you think the goal of having a relationship with the opposite sex is to always have someone with the highest "sexual value".

From my perspective that's a load of bullshit.

To be fair, 99% of men if they could would get with a super model everyday of their lives.  It’s just not an option for most guys.  Why do you think that DiCaprio just bangs 22 year old models will never get married?

[vizual]

@Thestarguitarist14  I wonder of a guy like DiCaprio ever met a woman who loved him for who he really is. Not just for being Leonardo Dicaprio the famous movie star.

Maybe I'm just lucky I've been with a few women with whom I've had a real deep(almost telepatic) connection. Looks, status and money don't compare to deep connection. 

[Thestarguitarist14]

1 hour ago, vizual said:

@Thestarguitarist14  I wonder of a guy like DiCaprio ever met a woman who loved him for who he really is. Not just for being Leonardo Dicaprio the famous movie star.

Maybe I'm just lucky I've been with a few women with whom I've had a real deep(almost telepatic) connection. Looks, status and money don't compare to deep connection. 

That’s a good point.  It is probably hard for him to tell if anyone is into him for who he is. Not for the movie star.

 

Let me ask you, if you were a movie star and could get with the top models in the world everyday whenever, would you not want to do that?  I don’t care who you are, every guy has this urge to get with the highest quality sexual mate that they possibly can get.  I believe that is why some movie stars and rock stars have a hard time settling down.

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, vizual said:

Yes, but the way you answered the question it seems that you think the goal of having a relationship with the opposite sex is to always have someone with the highest "sexual value".

From my perspective that's a load of bullshit.

Like I said, it all depends upon your standards. If you have low standards you can go develop a deep intimate relationship with a crack whore or a hunchback. But who are we kidding? We want the best we can get.

You don't need to go crazy with maximizing sexual value. But your mind IS maximizing it to some degree, whether you know it or not. Feelings of attraction ARE the maximization process at work. It is not a logical process, it is all handled subconsciously by your mind and all you know about it is the feelings of attraction and arousal.

When you feel aroused by another person, that's your mind telling you:

"ALERT! ALERT! ALERT! HIGH SEXUAL VALUE DETECTED! HIGH SEXUAL VALUE DETECTED! CAPITALIZE ON THIS IMMEDIATELY! DO NOT IGNORE!"

And your ego-mind says, "I love that person for who they really are. I'm so loving. This is true love."

It's all self-biased bullshit. A delicious hallucination.

[ColeMC01]

@Leo Gura Could you please define what "high value" is a for a guy? You use words like being edgy, but what does edgy actually mean? I do not really see any of my friends being "edgy" and they still get decent girls. Maybe confidence humor and non neediness is all you need these days (good sex too hehe)

[ColeMC01]

@Preety_India Well i am percieved by society is kind caring smart hard working and independent. However girls do not care about that and i get 0 attraction from them. Therefore i am not forced to adopt some player traits which will make me "unconscious" according to you. If girls picked guys based on "traits that make you a good partner" then you would not have to make this post at all. It is the traits you prefer to pick that forces guys to become more player like (leo included). Do not i deserve love? I would never abuse a girl but they do not care about that. They want the fun asshole that will so its their problem. I am not blaming them for what they like, its their choice. But dont start acting like victims about it please. I am not talking about you personally here, just most girls in general. I see this as a trend where girls pick assholes, get treated bad and start crying about it. Pick the good guys and no harm will be done. But you are not attracted to them so we are forced to become more player like now. I have guy friends that LITERALLY get friend zoned when they are kind and caring to the girl and get the girl when they are dicks to her. It is not a coincidence

Edited October 7, 2020 by ColeMC01

[Preety_India]

@ColeMC01  good guys like you are rare..most men after a woman aren't that way. They are aggressive at pursuing a woman. 

 

If I had met a good guy, I wouldn't have a problem. Most guys pretend like they are good guys and after that the true colors begin to show, like a year later.. 

It's not so easy. 

[ColeMC01]

@Preety_India LOL

I have had girls saying the same shit as you did right now, saying later they did not have feelings but loved me a person. Girls i really liked. It breaks your hurt but forces you to grow. If i met you then you would be saying the same. No player traits=no attraction unless you find me super good looking which by default most girls would not (im decent looking but not a model ofc so). By player traits i do not mean being a dick, just the stuff you already mentioned on the comments above that got you wet for that guy

Appreciate the kind words though

Edited October 7, 2020 by ColeMC01

[Preety_India]

@ColeMC01 appreciate your response. 

[vizual]

@ColeMC01  I know this is not going to be a popular response(Leo will disagree also)

But it is better to fully yourself and alone than it is to have people around where you have to  be someone you are not.

I am most happy when I practice rigourous integrity, even when that means no one likes me. 
 

A woman will never truly respect you anyway when you play silly pick up games to get into her panties. You might get into her panties by playing these games, but subconsciously she wont really respect you 

You might ask, what do i care if she respects me of that means i dont get laid? Again you have to find out for yourself if you value self-respect more... or getting laid.

and im not saying you shouldnt develop social skills, or the ability to be flirty with women. But im saying that you always want to play the “long” game in life. And the long game is being true to yourself... rigorously. This is the sign of being a true man. Boys play games, men have integrity.

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, ColeMC01 said:

@Leo Gura Could you please define what "high value" is a for a guy? You use words like being edgy, but what does edgy actually mean? I do not really see any of my friends being "edgy" and they still get decent girls. Maybe confidence humor and non neediness is all you need these days (good sex too hehe)

There are many factors that go into being "high value". You don't need to check every box to get a girl. But the more boxes you check the higher value girl you'll be able to attract and keep.

Edgy means saying and acting is slightly outrageous ways. Edginess spikes the woman's emotions and makes her feel alive and adventurous. An edgy guy keeps the woman's emotions stimulated by saying and doing bold and unusual things. This is what creates that classic "bad boy" vibe.

It is not necessary to get a girl. But it can be highly attractive, especially to very hot, very feminine girls.

Nothing in game is ever necessary. You can get a girl by being a total fool just through pure luck. But game is all about maximizing your value and odds.

[Leo Gura]

11 minutes ago, vizual said:

A woman will never truly respect you anyway when you play silly pick up games to get into her panties. You might get into her panties by playing these games, but subconsciously she wont really respect you

This is not true.

And stop framing this as "tricks" to get in a girls panties. Proper game is about becoming a legitimately more attractive and higher value guy. It is not fake. It is real. The confidence and humor developed through pickup is REAL. And it will be respected and appreciated.

Today I am genuinely much more attractive than I used to be. Because of the development work I did. And any woman who sleeps with me will benefit from that. It's not some trick I'm running on her.

[Preety_India]

 

 

6 minutes ago, vizual said:

@ColeMC01  I know this is not going to be a popular response(Leo will disagree also)

But it is better to fully yourself and alone than it is to have people around where you have to  be someone you are not.

I am most happy when I practice rigourous integrity, even when that means no one likes me. 
 

A woman will never truly respect you anyway when you play silly pick up games to get into her panties. You might get into her panties by playing these games, but subconsciously she wont really respect you 

You might ask, what do i care if she respects me of that means i dont get laid? Again you have to find out for yourself if you value self-respect more... or getting laid.

and im not saying you shouldnt develop social skills, or the ability to be flirty with women. But im saying that you always want to play the “long” game in life. And the long game is being true to yourself... rigorously. This is the sign of being a true man. Boys play games, men have integrity.

 

You have taken words out of my mouth. This is exactly what I wanted to say. 

I always want to look for integrity in relationships 

Without integrity, to me that relationship = death. 

 

I have a very high need for integrity because I'm equally upfront in showing my loyalty and integrity to the person. So I expect the same in return. 

Often times attraction is not so much about looks. But qualities. 

I might get attracted to a guy but obviously I want him to have integrity. 

 

Same for a good man. He wants a beautiful girl, but a girl with integrity. 

Wanting an attractive partner does not mean that you have to compromise on values by default. 

I can want an attractive man and also want him to be loyal, especially because I'm also loyal to him. 

It's simply asking for fairness in relationships. 

People here are making it seem like if you want an attractive person, somehow get ready to be mistreated or dumped or it's some kind of a privilege only available to the select few. 

I have seen so many couples where one person is so attractive and the other isn't. It's because they want to be together. They aren't playing games. They are simply respecting each other and being loyal to each other. 

Wasn't falling in love supposed to be about unconditional love and acceptance? 

[vizual]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Like I said, it all depends upon your standards. If you have low standards you can go develop a deep intimate relationship with a crack whore or a hunchback. But who are we kidding? We want the best we can get.

You don't need to go crazy with maximizing sexual value. But your mind IS maximizing it to some degree, whether you know it or not. Feelings of attraction ARE the maximization process at work. It is not a logical process, it is all handled subconsciously by your mind and all you know about it is the feelings of attraction and arousal.

When you feel aroused by another person, that's your mind telling you:

"ALERT! ALERT! ALERT! HIGH SEXUAL VALUE DETECTED! HIGH SEXUAL VALUE DETECTED! CAPITALIZE ON THIS IMMEDIATELY! DO NOT IGNORE!"

And your ego-mind says, "I love that person for who they really are. I'm so loving. This is true love."

It's all self-biased bullshit. A delicious hallucination.

i dont know where you got the idea from that romantic relationships are all about sex, or sexual value as you call it. A persons sex appeal is only 1 aspect in the equation, you are overrating it.

Your pragmatism regarding relationships is going overboard. There is such a thing as personal compatibility. People have different personalities and some people are more compatible than others. Surely you’ve intuitively grasped this by now.

Also , love for a romantic partner does exist. A love that can transcend looks and social status. Two people can have such a strong telepathic bond that external factors play little role in their love for each other.

is this self biased bullshit? Maybe it is. But still, this self biased bullshit can beat the other ego bullshit of attaining the female with the highest sexual value.

trying to get the woman with the highest sex appeal is nothing different from getting the most expensive car, the biggest house or the biggest bank account. It has little value in the happiness of your life. 

Edited October 7, 2020 by vizual

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, vizual said:

i dont know where you got the idea from that romantic relationships are all about sex, or sexual value as you call it. A persons sex appeal is only 1 aspect in the equation, you are overrating it.

Your pragmatism regarding relationships is going overboard. There is such a thing as personal compatibility. People have different personalities and some people are more compatible than others. Sure you’ve intuitively grasped this by now.

Also , love for a romantic partner does exist. A love that can transcend looks and social status. Two people can have such a strong telepathic bond that external factors play little role in their love for each other.

is this self biased bullshit? Maybe it is. But still, this self biased bullshit can beat the other ego bullshit of attaining the female with the highest sexual value.

trying to get the woman with the highest sex appeal is nothing different from getting the most expensive car, the biggest house or the biggest bank account. It has little value in the happiness of your life. 

This is exactly why I started this thread. 

Totally agree 

How come nobody on this thread understands unconditional love? 

I have fallen in love with a broke guy. I cared for nothing. His money or status or anything.. So am I wrong?? 

I fell in love with him. I felt an intuitive deep connection with him. I wanted him and only him.. I never thought about his sexual value . 

I transcended his looks or money or status only because I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. There was no game or sexual value there. 

It's sad how we are supposed to automatically believe that dating is this game like a contest to get high level contestant. 

I don't care how someone on this thread judges me. This was the main purpose of this thread.. 

I believe in unconditional love. I don't believe in all this dating rubbish and pua player nonsense. 

 

. 

 

[Thestarguitarist14]

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

This is exactly why I started this thread. 

Totally agree 

How come nobody on this thread understands unconditional love? 

I have fallen in love with a broke guy. I cared for nothing. His money or status or anything.. So am I wrong?? 

I fell in love with him. I felt an intuitive deep connection with him. I wanted him and only him.. I never thought about his sexual value . 

I transcended his looks or money or status only because I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. There was no game or sexual value there. 

It's sad how we are supposed to automatically believe that dating is this game like a contest to get high level contestant. 

I don't care how someone on this thread judges me. This was the main purpose of this thread.. 

I believe in unconditional love. I don't believe in all this dating rubbish and pua player nonsense. 

 

. 

 

Do you really understand unconditional love???  
 

Unconditional love is a state of being, not a state of mind.

 

I repeat: Unconditional love is a state of being, not a state of mind.

 

No one on earth is emanating unconditional love.  Otherwise you would not have any problems.  And everyone has problems.

 

If you truly believe in unconditional love then you would have no issues with pick up.

[Preety_India]

@Thestarguitarist14

Romantic love can exist even without dating. 

You can love someone absolutely and intuitively and and love them without all external factors and this is unconditional love.. 

I have given unconditional love before and I can still give it in the future. 

Sir you have a wrong idea on unconditional love. It does exist and I have experienced it. 

And not everyone is capable of it but some are. 

And not all dating is based on sexual value. This is just one paradigm and it's a paradigm lock. 

Try to broaden your perspective please.