How to deal with religious people who try to push their views

[StarStruck]

These are friends and acquaintances. I can't just ditch them. They are good company but from time to time they try to convert me. 

I never see them try to do with others. I guess because I'm perceived "weak" for them and they go after me metaphorically to convert me to their cause. 

My friend from the gym whom I train with from time to time is such a person. He gives good advice and I don't have money for a personal trainer.

There are other things I can talk about him too but I have to be careful when talking about Buddhism or something else. He gets easily triggered because he sees evangelical Christianity as the only truth. 

I noticed that I started to hide my own views to not disturb him but he never hides his views. His views don't disturb me it is very fundamentalist. I could say to him that I don't want to talk about religion but religion is a central part of his life. Any advice?

[Gesundheit]

Some of my Muslim friends know that I'm no longer a Muslim. And a few of them try to talk me into it. I used to find it irritating at first, but now that I have grounded myself in my perspective, I no longer care whatever they say. I flow with them a little bit and then change the subject at some point. Sometimes I joke lightly and play around. My final card if nothing else works is to tell them that I'm completely fine, comfortable, and at peace. And that I don't feel bad or wrong about my choices. If they respect me, they will stop here. If not, I leave regardless of who they are. The rule of thumb here is to never try to convert them or to be right. Never enter a religious argument.

However, it can get really problematic when it comes to my parents. They're too involved in my life and feel threatened everytime I leave them out or hide something from them. There's no solution here. I take whatever they say and don't talk back or argue or try to convince them with anything until they get tired and leave me alone.

[SgtPepper]

What you could do is ask him questions via the socratic method in order to get the discussion to a metaphysical ground, and a discussion of truth and falsehood.

The thing with American evangelicals, is they tend to believe that if you have not accepted Jesus as a savior (whatever that means to the individual), then you are not saved and will go to eternal hell. From your friend's perspective, he is trying to 'save you' and so you may get him to give up by actually questioning his belief system. Obviously, I would do it a friendly, scholarly way. 

 

[Preety_India]

I can tell you that it's a very difficult trap to escape. The Jesus trap. Evangelicals strongly believe that Jesus is the savior. 

I adopted Christianity long ago but I don't believe in fanaticism. I don't go around telling people that they should be Christian.. 

Being a Christian should be a matter of personal belief and private faith, not about converting anothers. 

I also don't believe that those who don't accept Christ are not saved or going to hell, that's just doesn't sound right to me. 

Because that's like a tyrant right? 

This video comes to mind 

 

 

God can be anything. It does not necessarily have to be a Christian God. 

For me God is a concept or a force, abstract personified. But no real label, just a meaning. A quality, a force present in all creation. This brings me peace because such a belief is no more about your God or my God. 

A God is just a God and should symbolize peace in every culture. 

Just tell your friend that you are at peace and that you don't need a religion to feel at peace. 

 

 

[Nahm]

On 9/14/2020 at 9:17 AM, StarStruck said:

I could say to him that I don't want to talk about religion but religion is a central part of his life

There is no such existence or actuality of “religion”. There is only one holding the belief there is. Religion = that belief, and nothing more. If a trillion people get together and say they believe in or subscribe to a religion, there is still only one holding a belief, and no actuality of a religion.

[StarStruck]

Thanks for the answers. Next time to topic comes up, I'm just going to talk about the positives of religion in general and not go further than that.

@Nahm that is some deep shit. I had to reread it 3 times to understand it. Are you saying that a belief is a "standalone thing"? I thought religion is highly personal. Everybody has its own variation of it. Nobody has the same knowledge/opinion whenever we talk about religion. I think you were trying to say that if there was one same belief where 1 trillion people believed; there is just the belief and nothing more.

Edited September 15, 2020 by StarStruck

[Nahm]

4 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Are you saying that a belief is a "standalone thing"?

“Standalone things” is the belief. A standalone thing - ‘stands apart from me’, or, ‘is not me’. Indirectly, by default, that is simultaneously the expression of the belief that I am also a ‘stand alone thing’. I must be, because I am not that ‘stand alone thing’. In this manor, I have objectified myself as a thing among things. But if I am a thing, what is knowing of this thing I am?

Quote

I thought religion is highly personal. Everybody has its own variation of it. Nobody has the same knowledge/opinion whenever we talk about religion. I think you were trying to say that if there was one same belief where 1 trillion people believed; there is just the belief and nothing more.

When all beliefs have been adequately inspected & thus seen through & ‘released’, there is only one possibility as to what remains. 

[hamedsf]

if you see that they're pushing their own view against you constantly, push them away like they've never seen the one so far 

[mandyjw]

I think being really well educated in this area is really helpful. When you know enough about a religion to be able to deepen or shake up people's understanding of it, they tend to leave you alone. I'm still insulted that the Jehovah's Winesses haven't come back since our last conversation...

[TripleFly]

Allow yourself to also give some tough love.

You don't gotta limit love the way you think you do.

You can love in a very radical way. And if they're upset by it, well that's their issues not yours, you're just being you aren't you?

[Loving Radiance]

23 hours ago, mandyjw said:

I'm still insulted that the Jehovah's Winesses haven't come back since our last conversation...

I am curious, how did you shaken up their understanding?

[mandyjw]

32 minutes ago, Loving Radiance said:

I am curious, how did you shaken up their understanding?

Just by telling them what I honestly think. I said love wasn't something you think or do or something like that, love just is like the light of the sun it falls on everyone, so she sort of accused me of not loving my daughter.  Funny you should ask, cause last night I had a 3AM revelation about that very subject. You have to be willing to have uncomfortable conversations I guess. They don't usually come across people who are willing to. I also said I thought that it was really brave to have the commitment to go door to door like that for something they really believed in, because honestly I can't imagine doing that. 

[Loving Radiance]

22 hours ago, mandyjw said:

she sort of accused me of not loving my daughter.

lol

How does the fundamentalist mind understand that? Is the interpretation of universal love for this mind equal to "no love to anything" cause you don't love something "fully/exclusively" (from their conditional experience)?

Edited September 19, 2020 by Loving Radiance

[mandyjw]

@Loving Radiance I really don't think they've ever thought about it before.