BDSM

[deci belle]

Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, Masochism.

Six empty names, yet even those who don't dare to explore them are already entangled in their traces.

Unknowing, they practice every aspect; going along without a thought of the end of their actions.

How is it different for those who see through such phenomena without denying phenomenal characteristics while in their midst?

How is it different for those who imagine rejection and abhorrence of the thought of exploring such phenomena?

Willing victims; reluctant predators… it's mutual accord by subtle adaption. Who would understand consent without first acknowledging wonder?

Presence of independent means and natural urgency guide one’s healthy and effective gratification of intent in the course of situational evolution. 

Serving the integrity of one’s subtle potential underlies the timing and rate of advance and withdrawal in mutual exchanges of personality dynamics.

The consensual repose of dominance toward the submissive is the device employed by independent means and natural urgency to effect the balance of one’s intent in meeting the measure of power inherent in creative cycles.

So in harmonizing integral mutual situational potential, dominance is expressed in accord with submissive intent by adaptivity to the creative.

Situational dynamics of advance and withdrawal influencing the timing and rates of exchange defining the situation decide the balance of potency and decline throughout the natural cycle of its transformative exigencies.

It is possible by mutual accord in reality that the submissive exacts its release if virtuously exerted dominance absorbs their factors of potential.

[Applegarden]

Damn, this was one of the hardest posts to read on this entire forum. I don't think i got the idea, but i did read the words.

BDSM could be fire tho, i would prefer something light hearted like strapping or smth, however i haven't had sex, so i don't spend much time thinking about that.

I feel like homos are really into it, from what i have seen by looking at adult websites, well, good for them, good for them...

 

[deci belle]

hahahhaaa!!  ~hi mr Apples,

Thank you for putting in that effort, and for the reply too. That was so kind❤︎!!

My post is partly an exposé on the subtle and not-so-subtle ways people engage in six overt aspects that comprise the advertised conventions of bdsm without even knowing it. So it's not like anyone in the last 5000 years came to invent the characteristics of behavioral expression typifying what has come to be crystalized in such rigid codes of protocol involving leather chaps, fishnet stockings and a veritable war-chest of signature fetish accoutrement.

As for the thin margins of social deviance enjoyed by traditional adherents of "orthodox" leather (what Applegarden referred to as "homos are really into it…")  In the shallowest terms, It isn't even necessarily sexually exclusive in terms of its objectives, per se~. Its most positive aspect (in my application) is in terms of exploring ranges of (relatively extreme) psychological terrain, by exploiting parameters of power-based relationship models. But such parameters aren't even my point— my application of such modes incorporates the second part of the original post for the purpose of describing general alchemic parameters in terms of application and technique.

Nevertheless, the point I wouldn't want anyone to miss is that most of us don't see (much less explore) that which comprises our shadow-side (psychologically speaking). In terms of herd-like wisdom, it is only acceptable to express abhorrence (while projecting such imaginings onto whoever or whatever we castigate as "other"), without risking an instant to ponder how  and why we actually have come to experience such visceral aversion… that is, how and why would we know? It would be very good to know~ but oh so dangerous! That's why I identified the two things in the drama portrayed as "willing victims and reluctant predators… it's mutual accord by subtle adaption." There are roughly two kinds: self-identified victims and actualized (self or otherwise motivated) predators. Victims either prefer identifying as such or they don't— but I know plenty whose preference as such is actually a veritable conceit. Hey, as they say~ it takes two to tango.

For the few who are even remotely familiar, or otherwise have or will discover an innate affinity with my writings' subject matter, the second part of the original post is an outline of (spiritually) alchemic taoist relational organization in terms of the "two things", both observed and manipulated within the framework of the naturally occurring timing of all created cycles which esoteric taoism refers to as the yin convergence. I would have to say that observation and manipulation of the critical juncture (in terms of time) occurring in all created situations is older than sin itself— certainly, the science behind such observation and manipulation predates taoism, which is certainly proto-chinese, at any rate.

My application of such timing and response is only a part (albeit critically important), of a general mode of adaption to situations that can be properly termed "therapeutic". Though my activity in such spheres isn't limited to relational metaphor and alchemic symbolism, it is its basis in fact.

Why else does the stereotypical image of a dominatrix having her way at the expense ($$$) of a type-A personality who otherwise would normally operate at the helm of statesmanship, industry and commerce exist?

Because it's as old as sin— not that I am. And to bring it closer to home, even the doyennes of certain "houses" (think posh), need an occasional break from domestic and societal dominance (where the spanking hand of a maid will do). Why else would one need so many rooms, hmmmm? ahhahahhahaaa!!

It's partly the power transfer involved in such antics that bespeaks its utility. Those habituated to managing power need a break, because proximity to creative power saps created power. Learning to rest in, or being reminded of the joys of recreational powerlessness is a way to save power by actually relinquishing power. This is where the device of consensual power transfer comes in. In terms of its effective economy by therapeutic intervention, application of dominance-for-hire is a visit to the side-lines, it's the quick-fix— then it's back to the proverbial hamster-cage for those so driven. I'm not sure about the "homos" that Applegarden referred to, but evidently, it seems to be doing them good as well. Not that all such activity is effectively therapeutic, because for those with broken psyches, the sick-puppies in search of existential meaning and social belonging in the fractured, compartmentalized developed world, it's not a good thing at all. 

Quote

It is possible by mutual accord in reality that the submissive exacts its release if virtuously exerted dominance absorbs their factors of potential.

The closing statement of the original post sums up the application of alchemic method in terms of the discipline of selfless accord in reality. The "two things" aren't only external, relativist, or internal modes of elemental cataclysm, sundering, or fusion. It takes awareness of any mode's operational aspects to derive whole accord in reality, even in terms of the Absolute and the Creative.

 

 

ed note: swap "application" and "technique" in 4th paragraph; add last half of the 5th; add "…the spanking hand…" in the 9th; add last paragraph

 

Edited September 2, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

This is just a capping note to clarify that "saving power (energy) by relinquishing power", is the working definition of self-refinement within the rubric of "establishing the foundation" of taoist alchemic practice. In terms of Don Juan Matus' Toltec tradition of Nagual shamanism, this would be partly expressed by the notion of not-doing; for example, the entry-level practices of living as a warrior, such as erasing personal history or eliminating the habit of personal inner-dialog, ie: talking to yourself. Such elementary power-saving practices eventually accrue to the point of having the personal power to maintain unbending intent, or will, in the tasks already invoked and/or advance practices penetrating the Sorcerer's Explanation.

This prime device of "saving energy" is identical to the taoist alchemic dictum where one "takes over creation and steals its potential."

So if I drew in a few readers with my solicitation through the OP's title, please forgive me~ not that I haven't addressed critical aspects of BDSM succinctly. For those who wish to establish further inquiry into such matters, please don't hesitate to PM me❤︎

[deci belle]

4mm hemp; use 1 ounce to control the tongue, and the whole body follows along willingly.

 

 

ed note: add ";…"

Edited September 25, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

S'body wrote:

Quote

 

Hello deci belle.

I haven't really talked with anybody what is into BDSM (i assume), so i would like to ask some questions.

In what kind of sub-domain of BDSM would you be into? And for what reason (like how did that kink develop)? If you are into masochism or sadism, how much pleasure does that cause you from 1 to 10? Have you ever been to a place where BDSM is an organized service, and do you have experience of that or is it just intimate relationships? If you want, you can share an experience of what its like, but very optional, as we are talking about intimate matters. If you want, you can also elaborate on whatever aspects you find valuable to share.

 

Oh yes, people are quite capable of making anything a lifestyle!

Just so you know, It is actually very possible that I probably haven't even had sex since before your birth. After having the kinds of spiritual (nonpsychological) experience(s) that I have, a sexual identity is so insignificant to me that I just tend to connect directly with people without (my) sexuality being a barrier (to me). Not that there isn't more or less sexual tension on account of its interpersonally relative potential (at the cusp of falling into the creative sphere) to host ridiculously pathetic decades-long situational "relationship" scenarios. Ok, well those two are Scorpios… haha. No one is spared, not even buddhas. People are relentless. I like sexuality, I just don't pursue it for grasping when standard procedure entertains all manner of subterfuge. Wouldn't it be lovely if we could just be natural? But Noo00oo···········!!!! hahahahhahaha!!

My domain is whatever is apropos. As far as its origins go (pertaining to my own kink), it was just a long gradual process. People had long assumed as such in certain social proximities, and that never did pose any problems for me as far as I was concerned. What really "helped" was my years-long obsession with the Cramps, an insanely unrepentant and un-inhibited music act of thirty years' duration, originally spawned in the mid 70s NYC punk scene with a decidedly quirky Rockabilly bent. Their first EP was actually recorded at the Sun studio in Memphis, where Sam Phillips had recorded Elvis' first hits with Scotty Moore and Bill Black. Sun Records is the birthplace of Rock and Roll, whose Mystery Train rode the two tracks of negro Blues and white Country music right through the Grand ole Opry while tearing up polite Southern Culture forever. Back in those days, the unsightly violence of drumming required that drummers actually be behind the curtain while performing with bands onstage for proper genteel society. Sick!!

At any rate, The Cramps is all it took to affect my deviant sensibilities in the end. Some of their song titles include: What's Inside a Girl, Queen of Pain, Devil Behind that Bush, Hot Pearl Snatch, How Far Can Too Far Go, Can Your Pussy Do the Dog?, Like a Bad Girl Should, Wet Nightmare, etc. Poison Ivy, the guitarist for the band, which was a veritable gang of juvenile delinquents unto itself, modeled herself after her femme heroes, the strippers of the 40s, 50s and 60s. I only discovered the Cramps after seeing a black and white picture of Ivy with her big Gretsch electric guitar on stage and obviously playing it for real while wearing a micro-mini sequin skirt with bangles for a top, outrageous hair and little pointy boots. I had to find out who that was. So yeah, I came out on account of the Cramps❤︎❤︎

I am the organized place of BDSM service. I don't go anywhere, it comes and goes with me~ heehee!! Oh, the good way to find out about it (in the conventional sense with all the fetish and stylistic protocols) are the various events happening in any urban center with a healthy Leather scene. But that isn't my scene. I'm glad it's there, because the various accoutrement would not be so easily accessible nor so high in quality (if that is one's prerogative). Of course, online is the sensible recourse, if the outrè scene is too much to bear. I never bothered with that, as my scene is all that's going to matter to my client when this dom's train rolls over her coals. hahahahhahhaaaaa!!! So, to answer the question, the scene, such as it is, isn't "out there" somewhere, it's an absolute presence, as opposed to whatever "intimate" generally denotes. Of course, it's that too, especially afterwards. The aftermath of any scene is très important.

In other news, as in most of my writing, which is to make accessible (relatively speaking), what is necessary to express the native presence of being in the midst of scattered conditional psychologies at variance, is to make the point that the created aspect, as such, is a veritable dead-end and that one ought to look into the potential of abiding in the essence of creation itself, instead. Instead of what? Instead of following the creative's self-reified relative tangential spinoffs belying the personality's identity issues, which are ultimately able to be dispensed with, in terms of their habitual expression. One cannot be other that who they are becoming. It's just the way it is, in that people are self and otherwise identified as the person's personality. It is also just the way it is, in that one's essential nature is uncreated, selfless awareness. The work of clarifying the relative to allow the expression of the absolute is called the self-refinement of enlightening qualities.

Such enlightening qualities are innate. Clarifying the relative conditional aspect of Mind to allow its primordial essential nature to radiate spontaneously is the point of authentic teaching, in that there are no two minds. The totality of reality is undifferentiated unified awareness. Such is the quality of Awake. It's not a thing. There is no thing. Creation and enlightenment are not different in terms of essence. The worldly illusion simply isn't a problem to solve, nor is it something to somehow excise for the sake of "progress." I'm sorry, but shallow social movements and extremist political activism is a sham~ too bad the followers of power-playing social engineers don't know it. It is muuuch more effective (and difficult) for one to do the work of self-refinement. Why are the angry disillusioned in denial so many, and the prior illumined evidently so few? It is because many are the collectively lazy and so few are the inconceivably audacious.

In terms of functioning as a dominatrix, I am using the basic power-transfer I mentioned in the thread's OP to access its therapeutic benefit for those whose personality-type can afford to rest. It's a method to facilitate the resetting of one's particular habit-pattern of psychological imbalance. The protocols are fundamentally important and have developed over millennia— social cast-offs and fringe-cults didn't invent it~ some just tend to over-identify as parodies of themselves per their fringe-lifestyle's demands; some more and some less. I don't identify with or project as a proponent of BDSM. It is just a potential beneficially effective tool (in the right hands), that I have long-approached before gradually and naturally finding a fit for its expression in my practice which is expressed as organic service. No one knows. It's a subtle thing I have come to own. Being a dom is not dependent on one's wardrobe, equipment, or even the sub/client. Its capacity is in confidence, one's own, without peer. It is a naturalness no one needs to know.

My initial post was made to point out that even "normal" people exhibit these "egregious" propensities unconsciously. I have two warnings from the moderator Forestluv about being a troll(?), "gas-lighter" and a provocateur and two other things he dreamed up on account of my dismissive response to his brutal off-topic pirating of a thread I started which he justified by his claim of being a meditation expert of 20 years. Yawn. So there is a bit of that kind of sneaky reverse-sensationalism in my delivery used to cut through people's preconceptions about certain subjects. Paradox is actually one of the most characteristic elements of the ancient taoist teaching methods. Those who are familiar with the writing of Chuang Tzu will know what I'm talking about.

Oh yes (getting back to BDSM), I have seen those "suction tables" too. OMG!! hahaa~ I'm very primitive in my appliction of bondage and discipline. I worked on location my whole still/motion-photography career, so my approach is minimalistic. I use a couple of 13 foot tall Rocky Mountain Beefy Baby grip/lighting stands and light-weight inter-connecting aluminum tubes from my days in fashion photography, to suspend arms, legs and such protuberant extremities (or that which I want protuberant), but I don't employ full-body suspension (unless the client has the infrastructure to support it). I use specific types of rope with weight ratings for that purpose. I bring my own collection of hemp, silk and synthetic ropes, pulleys, whips, canes, cuffs, gags, plugs, feather boas, nipple-clips, etc. Actually, the "restraint" part is up to the client— per their need to feel restricted. I'm happy  working with their cooperative approach to the "discipline" aspect. As a whole, it's all a negotiable continuum— the limit of the limitless (an ancient taoist term), is the space within which I am wont to take my prisoners to town.

I hope you will find a way to introduce yourself in a safe and sane manner to the potential that BDSM has to offer without going off on some dubious tangent~ but, hey, the adventure doesn't start until you fcuk up, non?

Take care, mon ami. Be innocently curious and don't be afraid to wander in that general direction. You seem to have a proficient and freely expressed vocabulary in describing the scenarios you would consider. How wonderful! Do maintain a degree of circumspection in your exploration and be honest with whoever you would like to know about your interest in kink, as you have afforded me. It really isn't about sex, per se. And that's a refreshing aspect to explore about the various aspects of BDSM.

 

 

ed note: add "Ok, well those two are Scorpios… haha" in 2nd paragraph; add "…of thirty years' duration, originally spawned…" in 3rd paragraph; tweak 4th and 5th paragraphs; add "belying" in 6th

Edited September 27, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

 

The lovely Mlle. Poison Ivy of the Cramps                                                       

                                                                                

 

 

                                 

 

                                 

 

 

ed note: add the 3rd image

Edited September 26, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

The OP concluded with:

Quote

 

Presence of independent means and natural urgency guide one’s healthy and effective gratification of intent in the course of situational evolution. 

Serving the integrity of one’s subtle potential underlies the timing and rate of advance and withdrawal in mutual exchanges of personality dynamics.

The consensual repose of dominance toward the submissive is the device employed by independent means and natural urgency to effect the balance of one’s intent in meeting the measure of power inherent in creative cycles.

So in harmonizing integral mutual situational potential, dominance is expressed in accord with submissive intent by adaptivity to the creative.

Situational dynamics of advance and withdrawal influencing the timing and rates of exchange defining the situation decide the balance of potency and decline throughout the natural cycle of its transformative exigencies.

It is possible by mutual accord in reality that the submissive exacts its release if virtuously exerted dominance absorbs their factors of potential.

 

The whole premise for this thread is in these lines. The following is a line by line commentary of the seminal text:

 

Presence of independent means and natural urgency guide one’s healthy and effective gratification of intent in the course of situational evolution.

The first line seems to me to be clearly self-evident. This is the very picture of sane activity in the course of everyday ordinary intercourse.

 

Serving the integrity of one’s subtle potential underlies the timing and rate of advance and withdrawal in mutual exchanges of personality dynamics.

The second line gets a bit deeper in that one's rational function must naturally be preordained in terms of its adherence to the integrity of one's subtle potential. It is, actually, but due to conditioning, this means the individual must become subtly aware of potential, a priori, in order to respond appropriately in terms of seeing situational timing objectively, without bias or inclination, in advancing and withdrawing attention according to relationship dynamics. Serving the integrity of (one's) potential has nothing to do with personal gratification. One doesn't own potential. Potential is not relative to the person. It is one's very situational milieu of being. Yet potential is not beholden to either the creative nor the absolute, as potential is the working essence of their non-differentiation. Gratification of mutual exchanges in terms of personality dynamics, per se, is relative to the situational potential based on reality, not the person. "The person" is relative to self and other, which is properly a variable expression of potential (karmic, if you will), and is therefore not beyond the created aspect. Potential is not created. Potential is the essence of the primal organization before the dichotomy of the two things (duality) before they fall into the creative sphere, yet comprising the the sphere of reality, which is neither creation nor absolute. This introduces the buddhist and taoist terms, Suchness and Complete Reality.

 

The consensual repose of dominance toward the submissive is the device employed by independent means and natural urgency to effect the balance of one’s intent in meeting the measure of power inherent in creative cycles.

This line illustrates one's enlightening function inherent in one's created dual nature in terms of relative situational rank. In terms of the person, this is called Sameness within Differentiation. Relative difference is not absolute. In terms of potential, relative difference simply is— it has no intrinsic value outside of conventional modes of karmic activity. Enlightening response operates transcendentally beyond convention (not that anyone might notice). The balance of one's intent is what drives enlightening activity, which is the sane energy you were born with. Just this is impersonal accord with reality. Again, this is not a reference to personal gratification. Consensual repose of dominance toward the submissive is simply the representation of undifferentiated flux, ever-adjusting and spontaneously balancing in pure equipoise. Consensual repose being the device employed by independent means and natural urgency is selflessly adaptive response in mutual accord. The measure of power inherent in creative cycles refers to being able to see reality, that is, potential, which is the essence of creation transcendently inherent in endless karmic cycles of birth and death.

 

So in harmonizing integral mutual situational potential, dominance is expressed in accord with submissive intent by adaptivity to the creative.

This line recaps the aspect of one's inherent enlightening function in terms of impersonal subtle spiritual adaption to karmic evolution. This is "meeting creation with potential" without relying on one's personal power. "One's personal power" refers to psychologically reified pattern-consciousness projecting desire, craving, aggression, and in general, a tendency to assume ascendancy over others as a matter of course.

 

Situational dynamics of advance and withdrawal influencing the timing and rates of exchange defining the situation decide the balance of potency and decline throughout the natural cycle of its transformative exigencies.

This is "finding out what happened in the end." As per one's selfless adaptivity meeting the creative in terms of its karmic momentum by virtue of advancing illumination in the beginning of yang and withdrawing its potential in the yin convergence, whereby the full expression of each created cycle is allowed to flourish and decline naturally without compulsive behavior (on one's part) influencing outcomes. Otherwise, how would one find out what happened in terms of potential?

 

It is possible by mutual accord in reality that the submissive exacts its release if virtuously exerted dominance absorbs their factors of potential.

In transcending endless cycles of yin and yang, unrefined potential is absorbed as a matter of course without effort or coercion. How would one even begin to do so? Doing so is the norm for karmically bound psychological momentum (action in thought, deed and unconscious adherence to creation) by ordinary people's pattern-consciousness. It is by not conceiving self-referencing (relative) adherence to creation that one accords with the real while in the midst of conditioned karmic momentum. The submissive, in this context, is created situationally karmic (conditioned) energy in its naturally responsive accord with real knowledge (knowledge of potential), in which dominance (nonpsychological awareness), is advanced, in terms of gradual practice. As I have said often  enough, seeing is itself the transformative agency. Seeing is itself "advancing" the fire in terms of the alchemic operation. Spiritual alchemy is not accomplished in any strict sense of doing. When adepts see potential, they see it as essence. Essence is the nature of karmic energy; not difference. Ordinary people see karma as differentiated energy, which is why ordinary people are subject to birth and death. In seeing karma as essence, one does not go along with creation and transcends its rounds of birth and death. Ordinary people see energy, whereas alchemists see potential. Seeing potential "frees" it from its situational karmic matrix, in that enlightening beings don't do anything with potential— much less karmic energy. This goes back to the beginning of this section, where "one's (refined) rational function (conscious knowledge) must naturally be preordained in terms of its adherence to the integrity of one's subtle potential" (real knowledge).

 

 

ed note: add line below quoted text; typo 3rd paragraph; radically change last paragraph

Edited September 30, 2020 by deci belle

[deci belle]

I wouldn't dare to try to fool anyone.

❤︎

 

 

ed note: delete 1st sentence

Edited September 29, 2020 by deci belle

[tsuki]

hi

[deci belle]

I will follow up quickly to confirm that just this type of psychologically relational aspect is exhibited appropriately in ordinary enlightening BDSM scenes as well, simply because one's adaption to conditioned circumstances is the natural course regardless of situational characteristics.

Quoting the last sentence of the commentary:

Quote

This goes back to the beginning of this section, where "one's (refined) rational function (conscious knowledge) must naturally be preordained in terms of its adherence to the integrity of one's subtle potential" (real knowledge).

"Preordained" is a relative term alluding to prior illumination of the psychological apparatus of the being that is going to die. Where the the rational function of conscious knowledge is subject to gradual refinement by concentration and insight, one's "prior illumination" is inversely effective to the degree one has dispensed with pattern-consciousness in meeting the demands of everyday ordinary situations. In other words, as one's gradual self-refinement results in less pattern-consciousness arising as psychological impacts (in the face of karmic stimulus), to that degree, conscious knowledge is subsumed as real illumination (objective, impersonal knowledge of accord in reality), which must naturally be "prior" to be an actualized functionality in terms of spiritually adaptive enlightening activity.

The preceding paragraph is a long-winded description of psychological (rational) activity and nonpsychological (spiritual) efficacy transforming in seamless accord due to gradual practice entering reality. The reason accord is seamless is because mind is one. Delusion and enlightenment are the same mind. Delusion is all there is to work with in terms of Creation. There is no other mind. There is no other enlightenment. Enlightenment is seeing reality without habitual psychological reference to the person. Self-reifying consciousness sees the same reality, but its perspective is delusional, and therefore karmically bound to the being that sees the person as "having" absolute identity, in terms of individual conscious projections.

It's not that individual conscious projection doesn't exist, if that's what the person is habituated to. If a person doesn't know that there is no such person in reality (in terms of absolute nature), karma is the result and delusion is the norm. Enlightening being's function perceiving essence (potential) void of personal identity, obviously isn't the person, whereas the psychological apparatus is the person's conditioned function. Both functions are accessible and naturally balanced without habitual pattern-consciousness in those who have recognized the basic sanity all beings are born with.

Self-refinement is the endless gradual path recognizing and actualizing inherent enlightening qualities by virtue of the sane energy people are born with. As such, entry into inconceivable reality is fathomless; mystery upon mystery.

 

ed note: typo; add quote and following three paragraphs

Edited September 30, 2020 by deci belle