Psychedelic Treatment For Depression

[Raptorsin7]

Does anyone have any insights into using psychedelics for treating depression?

I am planning on reading the current studies available, but having first hand accounts is probably better. 

I've had a handful of LSD trips, and a few trips felt like emotional breakthroughs and provided a sort of reset, but i've done 1 trip in the past 4 months and i've lost all momentum of previous trips. 

I do fear i'm going to fall into a trap of just repeatedly taking psychedelics trying to fix myself only to realize little progress, or make some progress and end up back at square 1 like what has happened to me this year. But i've had experiences with psychs that showed me glimpses of possible therapeutic effects of these drugs in forming habits and providing a reset from a rut.  

I'd say my biggest issue is emotional suppression and just an inability to relax and let go. There have been a few times on LSD where i was able to just relax and let go, but i've only gotten close to a full on cry/emotional release once and that was the day after a breakthrough trip.

Also, what role can psychs play in addressing personality/character flaws? I have issues with responsibility, maturity, arrogance, self obsession, etc and i want to uproot this stuff and grow into a more mature, self sufficient human. I'm planning on see a psychotherapist multiple times a week for the near future so i'm hoping this works out, but i don't want to fall into the trap of spending years in therapy going round in a circle, only to make marginal progress in improving myself.

[Arcangelo]

Hey Rap! hope you are good.

Here is my advice. An advice from someone as fucked up as you are, so prolly the best advice or the worst, I'll leave it up to your judgement.

Just. Give. Up.

Give up bro, give up on everything seems like you already did anyway. You said you had family money so why do you care? We evolve only if we have to. Since you got your level one needs filled, why care about anything? You don't need to evolve.

The thing is that there is no free will, surrender to that. Accept that you are one of the laziest persons in the world (I am the laziest BTW)

Now that I am 40yo I made my own bed and it sucks ass. Really. But since I was your age I have seen over and over again how I sabotage myself. I didn't ask for any of this.

So if I was you knowing that I am set for life financially I will buy lots of LSD, lots of weed and spend time in nature doing sports not giving a flying fuck about me being a good for nothing, lazy kidult.

 

 

2 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I'm planning on see a psychotherapist multiple times a week

Use that money to go out on trips instead. My advice.

If you want to use psychs to treat depression I will advice you to microdose 15-25 micrograms every 2-3 days for a month or so.

 

 

Arc

[Raptorsin7]

@Arcangelo I appreciate the advice, but I don't want to be a kidult... I want to become a mature, self actualizing human being.

I'm planning on doing some solo travelling when the air ports open up again, and I'm going to do a solo retreat towards the end of summer.

Did you ever try therapy or meds? Why do you think you're so fucked?

There's a lot I haven't tried before I'm ready to throw in the towel... but even if I got all my inheritance tomorrow and lived care free, I think I would still be miserable.

[Arcangelo]

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Did you ever try therapy or meds?

No. I talked to a unlicensed therapist 3 times. It kinda worked.

 

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Why do you think you're so fucked?

I am fucked because I wasted my youth being an alcoholic instead of a good student. I am almost 9 years sober now.

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I want to become a mature, self actualizing human being.

You kinda want it. Just like me.

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

but even if I got all my inheritance tomorrow and lived care free, I think I would still be miserable.

For sure.

Money makes you happy only if you buy the right things. But what do I know?

[kag101]

Hey man,

First of all, congratulations for your self-awareness. It's a very good sign that you are questioning whether psychedelics might become a crutch.

I have personal experience with this topic, so I'll share a little bit about my story.

 

Background

I've had depression since I was 9. And it started to become a big problem at 19. I really hit rock bottom. It was awful. Deep existential emptiness, lack of vitality, social phobia, etc.

Then, a friend invited me to go to an ayahuasca ceremony. And I had always wanted to try psychedelics, because I believed that I actually had some spiritual problem.

And long story short, it did help me in the beginning but then it became a crutch. And then it started to make matters worse.

 

Beginning... butterflies and rainbows...

The first few times were magical. It really took me out of depression and made me more loving. It gave color to my life once again. But unfortunately, it didn't last long. And then I soon found myself going to ceremonies every single week in order to "refill" my serotonin levels.

As time went by, the therapeutic effect became less and less powerful. And the trips became very repetitive, and sometimes downright scary and unpleasant.

I still believed that my problem was existential or something. And I was wearing the hat of being a "spiritual warrior". So I thought that I should fight the alleged obsessive spirits that were inside me that were depleading my vitality and weakening my true self.

First psychotic break

So... I started to become more and more intense on this journey. After some months, I had my first psychotic megalomaniac break during a ceremony. I cringe when I remember that day. I thought I was embodying God and that I was to awaken everybody. I thought that I looked like a wise yogi, but actually I was very loud, arrogant, childish, and obnoxious.

After that, I was expelled from this ayahuasca place, so I tried to find a new one. And again... I was taking it every week, and very large dosages. And I didn't see a problem with that, after all, it is spiritual, isn't it?

When it started to makes matters worse...

This strategy of mine for taming my depression worked for a while. I was on it throughout 2017. I did get some things accomplished in that year. But... I was way too racy. I didn't have peace of mind. I was always on-the-run.

Anyways, eventually, after the trips, my depression was getting even worse. The deep existential emptiness and lack of meaning would intensify. That has happened as well to a friend of mine.

I had my second full-blown break, and was expelled from this other place.

 

My opinion

People usually say that psychedelics are super safe and non-addictive, but I would be very cautious to make that claim. For example, if I had suicidal tendencies, I might have attempted to kill myself during one of those breaks. And regarding it being addictive, it surely is not like cocaine or something, but I've met many people who are addicted indeed in those substance, most of whom are in denial. People spiritualize as an excuse to use those substances.

That said, I have seen some people who have had great results with depression, but... they were on a very serious instituition here in Brazil called UDV. The thing about using psychedelics on one's own is that it becomes a self-medicating kind of thing.

My opinion for its usage for mental illness is that it is risky. If you also have a tendency for paranoia (like I do), then they are a big no-no.

But in a way, having those experiences helped me fulfill my desire to experience what it's like to trip balls and explore my inner world. I always had that curiosity, so in a way I'm glad that I fulfilled it. 

 

What really helped me

As with psychotherapy, dude... it's definitely worth it. But you have to find a good therapist. I can't stress this enough. Shitty therapy is worse than no therapy at all.

I'd also suggest going to a psychiatrist. I've been going to both for about year, and my life is so much better. I used to worry a lot about how I was wasting my life and how I was getting behind everybody else. And now I feel like I'm catching up and that I am becoming a truly developed human being. I made a topic on my experience with that. You can search it by searching "The power of traditional psychotherapy".

Antidepressants have a very bad reputation. My psychiatrist explained why that is so. There is a lot of bias, because usually the people who share their experience are the ones who had very bad experiences. If the treatment is successful, the person usually doesn't talk about it. After all, it is not a pleasant think to talk about it. So there are many many cases of "silent success stories".

Because of that, I made sure to write a review online of my experience with the medication I'm on. Here it is:

 

I really hope that you find some way to tame your depression, because it is a bitch. You deserve to feel good on a consistent basis. I'm rooting for you.

Feel free to PM me.

Good luck, man!

[Nahm]

18 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I'd say my biggest issue is emotional suppression and just an inability to relax and let go. There have been a few times on LSD where i was able to just relax and let go, but i've only gotten close to a full on cry/emotional release once and that was the day after a breakthrough trip.

Also, what role can psychs play in addressing personality/character flaws? I have issues with responsibility, maturity, arrogance, self obsession

Arguably, the role they play is that of removing the ability or doing-ness of holding those beliefs (that you are flawed, irresponsible, immature, arrogant, self obsessed). Those might be accurate depictions of your perspectives, and even behaviors & actions, but perhaps the reason psych’s work well for you is because you’re unable to hold those beliefs while on them...thus realizing those are just beliefs, perspectives, behaviors and actions....that none of that is true about you. You, are fucking awesome. Any belief contrary to your actual fucking-awesomeness is self created & perpetuated, and an unnecessary hurdle (but I love ya & I digress).

So, just a thought that came to mind...LSD is a bit of a long hall trip. Not saying I’m for or against it, but you might be ‘swinging’ from holding those beliefs about yourself, to more of a full blown trip & being without those beliefs, then as the trip fades, not noticing with as much nuance as you’d like how those beliefs reconstruct, or, are picked up / recreated again. The thought that came to mind...you might use dreamboard & loa, and or ‘put your feelers out’ on psilocybin (mushrooms) in vapor form. Compared to an ingestion which is quite deep and an hours long endeavor, the vapor is completely controllable in terms of incrementally dosing, and it’s effects are instant, and fade in less than an hour...maybe twenty minutes.  It came to mind because that might be highly effective for you in being able to ‘see more’, in terms of clarity around the picking up and putting down of those beliefs / thought patterns. Might see right through them, and realize the how’s, why’s and when’s of where they came from, or, where they were initially ‘picked up’ to begin with. Just thought I’d share that, use it if it’s useful. Godspeed and much love ??. (Disclaimer for clarity...I’m not at all suggesting this instead of therapy, and I have no sourcing info.)

[zeroISinfinity]

@Arcangelo Absolute master of life. @Nahm Your love has no limits Shadow GrandMaster we will meet again. 

Could be Polar Bear, do I have to? 

Ya know I love zen stick, well in both directions. 

Edited July 29, 2020 by zeroISinfinity

[Nahm]

@zeroISinfinity

Indeed. Soooo without limit, it’s Actually yours. 

(I went capitol A on that for you.)

[zeroISinfinity]

10 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@zeroISinfinity

Indeed. Soooo without limit, it’s Actually yours. 

(I went capitol A on that for you.)

Yeah it has no limits so much so that my gf left this morning my apartment to go to work in state of complete confusion and bamboozlement. She will never recover doesn't know what hitted her. Be careful what ya wish for. ?

Yes used Hand of God ofcourse. Why wouldn't I best spiritual practise ever. Deserves Nobel prize. 

Edited July 29, 2020 by zeroISinfinity

[zeroISinfinity]

Ok self pitty and self imposed crap. 

My take on this is for him to become self reliant then this stuff. I know you wish him best @Nahm and you want him to realize asap that he is Love. But I dunno. It seems to me that he needs atleast some sort of development. 

[Espaim]

17 hours ago, Arcangelo said:

If you want to use psychs to treat depression I will advice you to microdose 15-25 micrograms every 2-3 days for a month or so.

I second this.

It helped me see through a lot of shit in myself. I had to stop though because I was getting nauseus everytime when I dosed after one month.

Edited July 29, 2020 by Espaim

[zeroISinfinity]

 

 

[Nahm]

46 minutes ago, zeroISinfinity said:

Yeah it has no limits so much so that my gf left this morning my apartment to go to work in state of complete confusion and bamboozlement. She will never recover doesn't know what hitted her. Be careful what ya wish for. ?

Yes used Hand of God ofcourse. Why wouldn't I best spiritual practise ever. Deserves Nobel prize. 

I’m assuming by hand of God you’re making a proper reference to one of Leo’s older videos. Well done sir. 

44 minutes ago, zeroISinfinity said:

Ok self pitty and self imposed crap. 

My take on this is for him to become self reliant then this stuff. I know you wish him best @Nahm and you want him to realize asap that he is Love. But I dunno. It seems to me that he needs atleast some sort of development. 

I agree, except that the development is apparent and is a want, rather than actual and a need. 

[zeroISinfinity]

@Nahm Ok did forged my weapons. My tango buddy is back. Ok Shadow GrandMaster. 

 

So lets play I so love it. 

11 minutes ago, Nahm said:

I’m assuming by hand of God you’re making a proper reference to one of Leo’s older videos. Well done sir.

Haven't watched that one. Those videos had no value for me. Expected wisdom not that.

11 minutes ago, Nahm said:

I agree, except that the development is apparent and is a want, rather than actual and a need. 

Ok you are right. 

My take he will still cry after 4 years about same issues.

Wanna bet? 

[Nahm]

19 minutes ago, zeroISinfinity said:

Haven't watched that one. Those videos had no value for me. Expected wisdom not that.

My wife disagrees, but suit yourself. If you’re single that’s quite a wise production release. That is mastering relativity indeed. 

19 minutes ago, zeroISinfinity said:

My take he will still cry after 4 years about same issues.

Wanna bet? 

A month ago, had you even said six months, I’d have taken you up on a bet of any amount. 

[zeroISinfinity]

3 minutes ago, Nahm said:

My wife disagrees, but suit yourself. If you’re single that’s quite a wise production release. That is mastering relativity indeed. 

I want to hug Shadow GrandMaster ? but lets play I love it. Have my weapons, hope they will serve me well

 

My girlfriend too. I love ducks. Yeah it is. Master Relativity you said it. So Why would Mr @Raptorsin7 avoid mastering it. He literally cries for it. Helping him out in that regard won't harm him. 

Polar bear episode 12.

 

3 minutes ago, Nahm said:

A month ago, had you even said six months, I’d have taken you up on a bet of any amount. 

Well it's always now

But oh boyo you like bets. Wait 'til I get in US. You won't know what hitted you. 

You can't stand a chance in anything. 

[Nahm]

@zeroISinfinity

 Bring it on. ???

[zeroISinfinity]

3 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@zeroISinfinity

 Bring it on. ???

Well I caught you. 

Master relativity. You said it. 

So why would Mr Rap avoid it. I know that you want him best and exactly what he will realize with your help but there is a slight of a problem there. He has literally 0 discipline so how He will successfully follow Your advices. Not saying you are not correct. You are. 

It's his own intuition guiding him to. Cry about all these stuff he cries about, his own ❤️. Not to be dismissed. 

[allislove]

2 hours ago, Nahm said:

The thought that came to mind...you might use dreamboard & loa, and or ‘put your feelers out’ on psilocybin (mushrooms) in vapor form. 

Maybe a small dose of 5-MeO-DMT smoking?
I see a big potential for this substance, even a microdose.
Just a thought.

[zeroISinfinity]

I will burst in laughter I just can't helpit Anymore, love ya all., ?