I don't KNOW!!

[kireet]

I have realized that i dont know anything about anything in the world . i have just taken things as beliefs , ideologies and assumptions . i am a fool .... i feel like  a idiot who was talking stuff about i dont know . Can anyone tell , how do i directly experience non duality , non egoic consciousness (i honestly dont even know about these , just assumptions), but basically i mean how do i directly experience reality that enlightened people have , even a GLIMPSE of it !! because i just dont fucking know.... instead of thinking or studying it , how do i come to know?? i have been meditating for a year , but it only brings calmness  . i am 17 , so for now i cannot take psychedelics  . i know there is no shortcut or magic pill , but there must be something i can experience reality . what should i do ?? i tried to let this notion of spirituality go and do "normal stuff", but there is a craving inside to know . i am willing to try , please who has experienced some sort of higher state of consciousness , please tell me the method to know

[nistake]

Meditation, self-inquiry, contemplation.

Use your desire as fuel for your seeking. Be smart about it though. You can only find your true nature in the present moment. It's not in the future and it's not elsewhere either.

[Leo Gura]

See video: What Is Actuality?

[soos_mite_ah]

I don't know how to fully go into non-egoic consciousness but I think a lot of it possible though a lot of meditation, self help work, and shadow integration. One thing I will say that feeling like an idiot is a part of the ego because the ego likes to feel smart (its a shadow), but the self, the self is everything therefore it is an idiot and is also smart. It's okay, I've had a similar experience of felt like an idiot because I just accepted the assumptions around me. The best way to integrate feeling like an idiot, is to recognize it without judgement. It seems difficult, but what helps me is to say that it's okay to feel  like an idiot, it happens and its natural given the quality of consciousness we are surrounded by.  I'm using this as an example because incorporating self love does help in expanding the self while minimizing the ego. 

In addition to meditation, I would probably add self inquiry and  more research into subjects like nonduality and non egoic consciousness. I know you said  instead of thinking or studying it but I think that is important because the more background knowledge you know, the more you plant seeds mentally . Therefore if you have an experience or an observation in your everyday life or in meditation, it will register as nonduality and non egoic consciousness and you will be more aware of it because that is what you had your eye out for.  Always be looking for connections in the real world on how nonduality plays out. Basically ,the law of attraction is at play here.  I don't think you're doing anything wrong if meditation mainly just brings you calmness. That's perfectly fine, you probably need more things to supplement it. 

I can't say I have all of the answers, but  that's at least what I did because I personally don't feel comfortable with psychedelics or a magic pill so that's what I'm trying to stick to.  I'm not entirely sure if this helps but I thought I'd put my view out there. 

[remember]

57 minutes ago, kireet said:

I have realized that i dont know anything about anything in the world . i have just taken things as beliefs , ideologies and assumptions . i am a fool .... i feel like  a idiot who was talking stuff about i dont know . Can anyone tell , how do i directly experience non duality , non egoic consciousness (i honestly dont even know about these , just assumptions), but basically i mean how do i directly experience reality that enlightened people have , even a GLIMPSE of it !! because i just dont fucking know.... instead of thinking or studying it , how do i come to know?? i have been meditating for a year , but it only brings calmness  . i am 17 , so for now i cannot take psychedelics  . i know there is no shortcut or magic pill , but there must be something i can experience reality . what should i do ?? i tried to let this notion of spirituality go and do "normal stuff", but there is a craving inside to know . i am willing to try , please who has experienced some sort of higher state of consciousness , please tell me the method to know

staying a fool for the starter, might be your best choice 

don’t confuse idiotism with foolishness! its arrogance and idiotism to do so.

Edited July 28, 2020 by remember

[kireet]

@nistake THANKS , i will get to it and be smart about the choices i make

@Leo Gura i will see the video and get back to you .. Thanks!

@soos_mite_ah sure thanks , but rather than thinking , it will be better to know

@remember haha , but i think people around me at least must know something , but i think i dont know anything . otherwise why will they be so confident about the stuff they say ...? (or who knows , even they are deluded by beliefs and ideologies)

[remember]

Just now, kireet said:

haha , but i think people around me at least must know something , but i think i dont know anything . otherwise why will they be so confident about the stuff they say ...? (or who knows , even they are deluded by beliefs and ideologies)

delusion comes in different degrees, always.

[Nak Khid]

1 hour ago, kireet said:

I have realized that i dont know anything about anything in the world . i have just taken things as beliefs , ideologies and assumptions . i am a fool .... i feel like  a idiot who was talking stuff about i dont know . Can anyone tell , how do i directly experience non duality , non egoic consciousness (i honestly dont even know about these , just assumptions), but basically i mean how do i directly experience reality that enlightened people have , even a GLIMPSE of it !! because i just dont fucking know.... instead of thinking or studying it , how do i come to know?? i have been meditating for a year , but it only brings calmness  . i am 17 , so for now i cannot take psychedelics  . i know there is no shortcut or magic pill , but there must be something i can experience reality . what should i do ?? i tried to let this notion of spirituality go and do "normal stuff", but there is a craving inside to know . i am willing to try , please who has experienced some sort of higher state of consciousness , please tell me the method to know

.

 

.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcTqXAD7pvM

[Leo Gura]

41 minutes ago, kireet said:

@Leo Gura i will see the video and get back to you .. Thanks!

Don't get back to me. Get back to you!

[kireet]

@Leo Gura yeah , i will get back into actuality  , i just want to ask  two  question about the practise . so when i am looking at my hand and i am somewhat conscious of my hand ,  my hand that is all that is actual and the thoughts and beliefs like "this is my hand " , "this is brown/brown/white " etc .. these are just beliefs and imaginations right ??

 and in the beginning of the video you said ,  it is actual when you hit the moment where you become hyperconscious of  "hand"  , so what if i am just looking at it blankly without being hyperconscious of it , is that also actual or is that also imagination? can you please clarify? , because i want to the practise right

By the way , Thanks for the help.

 

[nistake]

@Leo Gura Well played

[Seraphim]

Shaktipat/spiritual transmissions can give you an enlightenment experience, Jivanmukti for example has youtube-videos with strong energies. Guided meditations can also do it.

[Leo Gura]

56 minutes ago, kireet said:

@Leo Gura yeah , i will get back into actuality  , i just want to ask  two  question about the practise . so when i am looking at my hand and i am somewhat conscious of my hand ,  my hand that is all that is actual and the thoughts and beliefs like "this is my hand " , "this is brown/brown/white " etc .. these are just beliefs and imaginations right ??

 and in the beginning of the video you said ,  it is actual when you hit the moment where you become hyperconscious of  "hand"  , so what if i am just looking at it blankly without being hyperconscious of it , is that also actual or is that also imagination? can you please clarify? , because i want to the practise right

By the way , Thanks for the help.

Why are you asking me what is actual?

If I tell you, that will be concepts coming from a human. A human could lie to you or be wrong.

Actuality cannot be wrong. Locate what is actual in your experience without asking anyone.

[kireet]

41 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Why are you asking me what is actual?

If I tell you, that will be concepts coming from a human. A human could lie to you or be wrong.

Actuality cannot be wrong. Locate what is actual in your experience without asking anyone.

True , I will need to find the answer for myself ! 

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

What is wrong with not knowing ? 

Do not make not knowing a form of negativity. 

[Someone here]

@kireet it's because knowing is an illusion.. A second order phenomenon at best.  Being is what is fundamental. Pure being or pure actuality is all that there is.  Yet your mind ofcourse is trying to dissect being into subcategories.. One of which is "knowing". But what is knowing made out of other than being itself?  So in reality there is no knowing and you never knew anything.. All the time it was just being dressing up like knowing. Knowing is useful in the relative domain nevertheless.. But if you seek to unravel the whole you can't know it.. You can just be it. 

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

1 hour ago, dflores321 said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua For me I would say it gives me an existential angst. Because people are so eager to tell you whats what but theyre just beliefs. Knowing the Truth ends that imo.

I know what you mean. The more you do not know and the more you do not fit into the "normal" social structures.

I have experienced this and it can be very uncomfortable relating to other people especially your parents. 

But it is a question of gut. Go fully trough it, if you can do it joyfully it's much better.

This would not be a great problem if you where living alone on this planet, the root cause are all the dynamics with society and people around you, but it depends on how you are going to respond to this.

 

[Nahm]

@kireet

Be ‘where you’re at’, and let all the judgment go. Especially the judging of yourself. You meditated for a year and that calmed the mind. That’s perfect, you’re perfectly, naturally, organically, ‘on track’. Refrain from judging yourself so readily, as if you’re missing something, as if the actuality where something to get to. Actuality is here now, and is ‘unwrapped’, not somewhere or something to get to.  When you do that, you’re going away from actuality, into abstract thought about some other scenario which doesn’t exist, and subtly, sneakily, comparing ‘where you are’ to ‘where you should be’. You are where you are, which is the only actuality of ‘where you are’. Don’t believe the comparison, and more so, notice intently the feeling of that comparison, and the resulting feeling when you think ‘I’m not there’ / ‘where I should or could be’ in realization. Let all of that go, and ‘point’ attention / focus back inwardly so to speak, back to you, back to what is knowing the direct experience of right here, right now. 

 

Hold your hand in front of you and notice there is perception (seeing), and the feeling, or sensation ‘inside’ the hand, and notice “hand” is a thought, a label you learned. 

Take a minute to dial into, or focus intently yet effortlessly on each of those: the thought “hand”, seeing, and sensation. 

 

Then hold your hand behind your head, and notice the thought “hand” is just the thought. Notice there is no perception (no seeing a ‘hand’). Notice there is still the sensation. 

Then move your hand back ‘in front of you’...and notice the experience is only: the thought “hand”, the sensation (that there is feeling), and perception (that there is seeing). 

 

Repeat all that, but this time notice in perception, in seeing...there certainly appears to be definable specific ‘edges’ of your hand. Visually, it is crystal clear where your hand is, and where it ends and the air is. Then hold your hand behind your head again, label it garfenkus (instead of the label you know, ‘hand’)...and notice / focus on only the sensation of ‘the hand’...notice, in feeling, there are no discernible ‘edges’. Notice the edge-less ‘fuzziness’ of sensation / feeling. 

 

Now close your eyes and relax a bit, and notice the entire body is filled with sensation, or, that there is feeling. With your eyes closed, focus on feeling the entire body, and notice, there are no discernible ‘edges’ of feeling. Now notice “body” is a thought, a label you learned, and that is all it is. 

 

Now take a good 360 degree look around. Notice how many labels are being believed for all the “things” you’re seeing. But notice, there is no separation between what is seen, the seeing, and the knowing of the seeing. Notice the thoughts arising as labels, and the knowing of the thoughts and the seeing, are not separate from ‘eachother’. Really scrutinize to find the separation between ‘objects’, the seeing of, and the knowing of the seeing. The more you scrutinize to find the separation between ‘objects’, seeing, and knowing...the more clear it is that no separation can actually be found. Notice each time it seems a separation is found...that was only a thought, which was being believed. 

Notice the “trick” is you convincing you that there are “separations”, only by believing the thoughts, that there are. Notice you’re using thought, perception, and sensation, to “trick” yourself...to convince yourself of this...when the actuality is that experience is one invisible whole. Now notice, whoever or whatever ‘you’ are, you are that one indivisible whole. ‘You’ are not separate, and no ‘thing’ is actually separate from ‘you’. 

 

Do that: ‘objects’, seeing, knowing collapse anywhere, anytime throughout the days. As you do, you’re going to experience feelings about this. As you do, over and over...dial into, or focus intently yet relaxed upon feeling. Frame this exercise up as the “point” is to stir up that response of feeling, and focus on that, letting go of attachment to seeing and thinking. 

 

 

You might also contemplate that you were not made. Notice, people have sex, and that could be planned. You could write a whole outline of how it is to go, what’ll transpire, who’ll do what, etc. But...nobody can make any actual plan whatsoever of more literally, how to create you. As people we can claim to do the sex, and we can plan to have babies...but not the actual creating, of another person. It’s a total cover up, a mirage. 

Then try to think of one single example of anything whatsoever - which isn’t actually just a state of change. If you leave an apple in the sun, vs in the refrigerator...it’s very easy to notice the variance in change. In sunlight, an apple is going to decompose faster than in the fridge, but the apple in the fridge decomposes, changes, too. Carry that out to rocks & boulders. The state of change of rocks is slower, but over enough time they ‘melt’, change, or decompose, too. Begin to notice there is no “thing” which isn’t actually changing. That there are “separate things” is illusory, do to the slow rate of change, and relativity to your seeing and experiencing of all the “things”. Notice again, experience is one whole, of apparent changing-ness. Body wise, you too are an apparent changing-ness. “Cells” dying, cells dividing, etc. Always and only changing. Notice the profundity of that it doesn’t seem like it. Notice how perfect that is. Totally seems like there are solid, separate, individual, “things”. But there isn’t. You’ve just been believing there is. 

Now contemplate, ‘you’, or rather, the body you previously believed was a “separate thing”...is sized ever so perfectly in the middle between an atom, and the earth. What are the odds of this? If there were billions of years of random evolution, and an eternity of who knows what prior to the “Big Bang”...what are the odds that all of that led to you just happening to be you, right now? Then notice, “odds”, is only a thought. There’s no “odds”, that is only a thought. Then contemplate that you, “physically” speaking, as a “body”...are actually an apparent changingness. 

Now let all that go and recall that you have ‘something’ in experience which is unique and is not experienced anywhere ‘outside of you’, ever, and that is your sense of humor. Now consider how ridiculously funny it is that the cover up, the means of you convincing yourself you exist as a separate body or person, that there is a universe and physical reality...is the Big Bang. Notice, this is really just a reference to something “your parents” did. Notice they too, are changingness. They are only, apparent. 

Keep this in mind anytime you notice any uncertainty or fear in life. Collapse the objects, seeing & knowing, leaving only the knowingness...and have a hearty laugh at “fearing” what is only changingness, inseparable of, you. 

[allislove]

@Nahm ?

[Nahm]

@allislove ??