my ego is screaming and fighting back.

[Nahm]

@Jay Ray

It’s all a one thought at a time situation. Totally up to you wether you let them go or continue believing them. Making up separate entities is conceptualizing further, away from letting go. 

[Bogdan]

 

15 hours ago, Artsu said:

Try to reason with it. If it won't listen to reason, just try to ignore it.

Maybe find good spirits to help you fight it. ?

Spirits with negative polarities aka demons feed on your attention. So reasoning with them is only giving them more power, because you are still playing their game, they are still tricking you into GIVING your attention to them. They cannot posses you, they can only trick you into letting them posses you.

Ego, like anything, has levels of complexity - gross and subtle aspects to it. Essentially, every "i" thought is ego, and you can't avoid having "i" thoughts as long as your body is alive, because at some point, "i" will have to eat, shit, drink, piss etc. Of course there are i thoughts that distract you from love, and that is what spirituality conventionally calls ego, and you can still have i thoughts being completely dis-identified with them - that's a "healthy", or awake ego - but when you are in that state, the boundary between the ego and everything else dissolves - you are aware of your Self, which is Presence/Love/God/Emptiness/Everything/Truth/Infinity, the you that doesn't change etc.

15 hours ago, Jay Ray said:

@Artsu if it is a spirit then what should I do about it then?  any advice on how to proceed? 

thanks!

So what you can actually DO is LOVE them. LOVE EVERYTHING! Negatively polarized beings cannot stand love, that's how they have to be in order to remain negatively polarized - so just love, love, love! And Loving kinda comes together with selflessness - you stop making the whole situation about you, and you actually make it about others - in this case, it's about helping those so called "demons" accept love (because they will have to sooner or later) - and the way you do that is through surrender - by actually having the attitude of "ok, i accept you staying as long as you like! If God accepts you being here, then i accept you too! I LOVE YOU!" But you really have to mean it authentically, and that can be tricky - because they will leave if you do that, but you can't do it while still wishing them to leave. You must learn to truly accept them - this means accepting the possibility of your insanity, and that relaxes you, because you can then stop that desperate trying to figure out if you actually are insane or not (because that's what you're actually doing, and that is the insanity, you are asking yourself if you are insane or not) and making things more impersonal, explaining things through demons and angels and shit can be helpful. But it's you, everything is you. There is nothing that isn't you. 

I'll give you one last point that helped me a lot, and that is recognizing that no THING, as unpleasant as it may be, doesn't block my awareness. No thing can stop me from being aware of the Presence that IT is happening in. On the contrary, EVERY THING can be used as proof of Presence, because no thing can be Present without Presence (does that make sense?) So if your Self is Presence itself, then it doesn't matter ego or no ego, demon or angel, they are all a celebration of the Presence that pervades and precedes them all. So move your attention on the fact that you are aware of something, not on the something itself. 

What you are can NEVER appear.

Edited July 20, 2020 by Bogdan

[Jay Ray]

@Bogdan that makes a lot of sense, thank you! 

[Artsu]

@Bogdan spirits, including demons, were born human. Good and evil is a spectrum and i don't know if there is a non arbitrary point at which one goes from bad to neutral. A person, generally, is a mix of good and bad, unless they have done away with bad completely.

So if this is a spirit, and it is causing trouble, it does not necessarily follow that it is a demon or cannot be reasoned with. The spirit may be more neutral, but providing resistance for some reason or another. 

Or, i could be misreading the situation entirely, and this is something like a dissociation forming between ego and self, as was suggested.

Edited July 20, 2020 by Artsu

[Jay Ray]

@Artsu

7 hours ago, Artsu said:

 

 this is something like a dissociation forming between ego and self, as was suggested.

I am like 90% sure that this is what is going on but I am open to the idea that it could be a spirit.  my whole life I have lived a very egoistic life and this voice seems VERY familiar in a sense not like a random thing I think. 

[DreamScape]

Whats your spiritual practice? What is your overall mood day to day? What are some traumas you work through?

The ego screaming = something not going right. Surrender should be natural, and if resistence comes up then its a natural resistance that youre in, like a movie you're sucked into.

Disassociation is when youre watching the movie but its like you're not there, youre hearing the voices but youre not, youre there but youre not, you have voices in your head but they're not yours. This is disassociation and not awakening. The ego must be integrated, it is not a parasite or an enemy, it is you, just a less mature version of f an integrated master. 

Be careful. Disassociation is not something to fuck with. My ego only did this when I was pushing it away and trying to get rid of it, which led to disassociation and insanity, awakening is actually more ego and awareness.

Connecting to the universe should not be no ego and such. You will exist forever. You also need an ego. 

 

Edited July 21, 2020 by DreamScape

[Jay Ray]

@DreamScape thank you, I now see the ego as a separate thing from me but I am not trying to get rid of it, I see it like a boombox, It just makes noises that I can ignore if I really wanted or I could  listen to it depending on the situation. 

[DreamScape]

@Jay Ray trust your intuition

[Bogdan]

23 hours ago, Artsu said:

@Bogdan spirits, including demons, were born human. Good and evil is a spectrum and i don't know if there is a non arbitrary point at which one goes from bad to neutral. A person, generally, is a mix of good and bad, unless they have done away with bad completely.

So if this is a spirit, and it is causing trouble, it does not necessarily follow that it is a demon or cannot be reasoned with. The spirit may be more neutral, but providing resistance for some reason or another. 

Or, i could be misreading the situation entirely, and this is something like a dissociation forming between ego and self, as was suggested.

 

Just like there are 7 chakras, 7 notes in a musical octave, 7 colors in the rainbow, 7 days in a week etc. there are 7 densities of light. Every density has some ingenious, unique way in which the One knows itself. In the first density The One is asleep (the elements, physical matter). In the second density, the One is dreaming (plants, animals etc.). In the third density, the One awakens (human beings). The 4th density is all about love, the 5th is all about wisdom, the 6th is all about the balance between love and wisdom, and 7th density beings are basically with one foot in the Absolute and one in the Relative (quite unimaginable).

 We currently are in the 3rd density. What we call demons and angels are, in a way, our future selves, that have graduated 3rd density. The ones that decided they want to skip love are what we call demons. So they are not good or bad, they are just like the left and right hemispheres of the brain. 

Now, it is true that a spirit that is causing trouble is not necessarily a demon, it may be for example a recently deceased relative or loved one that is desperately trying to cling to physicality, but in my experience it's pretty tricky trying to figure out this stuff through this route, of understanding angels, demons, physicality, basically the feminine side of God. The mythology and symbolism side, if you will. I only starded researching this stuff after several awakenings, and all the notions i had beforehand only hindered my awakening process and created a lot of doubts and fear. That is ok, God knows what it's doing, lol, but my advice to @Jay Ray is to focus more on the masculine, eastern, non-dual, seeing through the illusion type of thing before dabbling INTO the illusion, if that makes sense  

[Jay Ray]

@Bogdan that makes sense, to be honest I really don't want to look into spirits and demons because I know it would scare that shit out of me and I probably would flee the spiritual path if I had a nasty encounter. I want to have an enlightenment or non-dual experience and to create peace, that I what I am after. I want peace. the only reason I brought up the fact that my ego was screaming was the fact that I wanted to know if others have experienced it or if it was a sign or progress or completely not important. it was just really noteworthy and quite different from my normal thoughts but had a very familiar feeling too. I really feels like the old "me" was talking not some random other entity, If I was to not pay attention and skip meditation for a month, it would be me again. 

This is my line of thinking

thanks!

Jay 

 

[Artsu]

Inquiring into spiritual topics such as these makes you better equipped to dealing with these matters.

Spirits will influence you regardless of what you believe about them, though of course if you intentionally try to bring on spirits, their influence will be greater. You will have a better understanding of the way they are influencing you though.