Letting Go of the Past and Moving Forward to the Future

[MrQuestionMark]

I've used my quarantine experience to develop an online business idea that I've been thinking about. Since I have so much time on my hands (I got laid off due to COVID-19), bad memories from my past have come back in my head. Sometimes, the thoughts of my past gets in the way of my ideas. I know that what's done is done, and I can't undo the past. I also know that my past does not determine my future. But the bad experiences still bother me today. How do you all handle moving on from your past? (I tried to cut as much of my back story as possible. Feel free the story below).

 

Back Story: In the fall 2013 semester, I took a break from my academics to join my colleges’ newspaper. I had a lot of success as a staff writer. So I decided to take that next step. I applied for an editor position that next spring and became the News Editor. I ended up regretted this decision immediately.

It was my first time being a leader. I had a hard time finding stories in the very beginning. I had a harder time managing people. I was very passive as a leader. Close to the midway point to the semester, the staff had a meeting. Everyone was dissatisfied with the front page stories. My peers said that there was no excitement on front page. Although I did not make any decisions on where stories should go (which was another mistake I made) and I was missing key stories from the staff, I took full responsibility. I changed my entire approach in how I looked for stories.

Overtime, I changed the way I carried myself. After my conversation with one of the editors, I was more relaxed, and more assertive. That only resulted in two great issues during that span (4 out of 10 total for the semester). Despite my growth, I lost the staff and editors by the time I figured everything out.

The paper got worse throughout the semester. I every time I held people accountable, they always had an excuse on why they didn’t do their story. Those same people would get upset about the paper looking bad. I was even criticized from people who wouldn’t show up to the newsroom for weeks at a time. It felt like I was the editor and staff writer and everyone else was the critic.

In addition, there was other drama among the staff and editors that kept work for coming in. The EIC made a few questionable moves behind my back. When I addressed it to him, he justified his decision. Even though I let it go, that didn't stop everyone from putting the blame on me. The newsroom was a toxic environment (there was also drama during my staff writer days). When the semester ended, everyone told me how good of job I did. They were all sad when they found out I wasn’t coming back. I went back to taking my classes that next semester. In 2015, I transferred to a university and got my B.A. two years later.

During my time at the university, I was able to forget about what happened and I moved on with my life. I had few freelance jobs, but nothing that would lead to a permanent job. Once I thought about starting my own business, those old memories started coming back.

Since I can’t change the past, what are the best ways to move forward?

[K VIL]

@MrQuestionMark no more stories. what can you do today?

[Zigzag Idiot]

 

[MrQuestionMark]

@K VIL Something for me to reflect on. I can find new passions or focus my energy on something else. Thank you for your response. 

[MrQuestionMark]

@Zigzag Idiot That video was amazing. I’m going to watch it several times. Thank you.