What Should I Be Doing Right Now?

[Lorcan]

Hello, Im Lorcan Im 14 years old.

Ive been doing meditation for a solid 2 months now, these can be anywhere from 20 minute to 1 hour sessions , I have missed 3 days of meditation but other then that Im getting more consistant

For the Majority of my Summer so far I have been playing video games ,watching youtube etc.

I did do Running for 20 minutes everyday around my house but I gave up as th weather got gotter the amount of flying insects that followed you arond grew so I gave up in Frustration( They are so annoying , they get in your eyes ears nose etc.)

I have been doing my meditation consistently everyday. (With a few days I forgot or was way too tired to do it)

I have read the book The Four Agreements and The Wheel of time. ( Very good wisdom type books)

And I am currently trying to read marcus aurelius's meditations. But having trouble grasping it thus reading it very slowly and making little progress.

 

What could I be doing more?

Why do I feel unfulfilled?

What should I be doing right now, somwtimes I have no idea what to do and just decide to play video games as I dont know what I should be doing

 

[abrakamowse]

11 minutes ago, Lorcan said:

Why do I feel unfulfilled?

You feel unfulfilled because there's no "you" to be fulfilled. And you want to maintain a false idea of "me" or something who needs to feel fulfilled.

There's no a "self" that needs to feel fulfilled.

[abrakamowse]

If you read the 4 agreements and you liked it , maybe you will like the mastery of self:

https://www.amazon.com/Mastery-Self-Toltec-Personal-Freedom/dp/1938289536/

[Lorcan]

1 hour ago, abrakamowse said:

You feel unfulfilled because there's no "you" to be fulfilled. And you want to maintain a false idea of "me" or something who needs to feel fulfilled.

There's no a "self" that needs to feel fulfilled.

What do you mean there is no self? How can it be false idea of me? I think therfore I am, and you tell me I am not?

I am a thinker that has desires.

If I am to rid of desires am I better off dead.

 

[abrakamowse]

18 hours ago, Lorcan said:

What do you mean there is no self? How can it be false idea of me? I think therfore I am, and you tell me I am not?

I am a thinker that has desires.

If I am to rid of desires am I better off dead.

 

I thought the same thing at your age. And I have to say I was sooo wrong. When you are free of desires you will find your true desires.

Right now you desire what it was programmed for you by the environment, your parents, friends, etc. When you have no desires a true desire appears and that is your real self.

If you think this teaching is very advanced, it's Ok. You will learn it with time, I am sure of that.

Quote

"I am a thinker that has desires." 

Who says that? Isn't that another thought? How do "you" create "your" thoughts?

Can "you" stop thinking?

Edited July 30, 2016 by abrakamowse

[Swede]

I tried to read Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations. I think it is a sleeping pill. I cannot read these kind of books. The text is too boring.

But about what you could be doing more in your everyday life: Maybe reconsider if the time you spend playing video games and watching youtube is well invested. Ask yourself: What goals do I have in life, what is the most meaningful for me in life, what are my dreams in life, what am I good at in life and how can I develop my strenghts, how can I make the world a better place to live in, and is playing videogames and watching youtube helping me somehow in life or leading me somewhere in life?

Reading personal development books and meditating is very great, but just don’t forget that you also have to live life and do things in practice. Like, after reading a book about dating and love, it’s time to go out there picking up a nice girl, or boy – whatever you prefer – and then you will see what life has to offer.

You are asking why you feel unfulfilled. Just spend time doing things you feel is important and meaningful. And keep meditating. I tend to get deep answers to my questions while meditating.

[abrakamowse]

I agree with @Swede  the best solution is meditate. That will give you what you are looking for effortless.

[Falk]

On 29.7.2016 at 9:14 PM, Lorcan said:

Hello, Im Lorcan Im 14 years old.

Why do I feel unfulfilled?

What should I be doing right now, somwtimes I have no idea what to do and just decide to play video games as I dont know what I should be doing

Just the other day i was thinking about what i would have told my 15y.o. self in retrospective to help him... i´m 33 now and happy with how my life turned out but i could have saved myself so much unnessecary suffering!! (not necessary suffering, i can´t prevent you from that, but the additional unnecessary suffering can be prevented i think)

Here are the advises/ideas for 15y.o. self , that also concern your post:

1. stay away from videogames (i wasted so much time) of course my 15 y.o. self most likely wouldn´t take this advise and distrust that my future self wrote him this advise  But it depends, if you find you have a balanced personality you CAN play from time to time ...if you have an addictive personlity like me (ofc i didn´t know that when i was 15) and tend to play for not only 1hour but 5,7,10hours in the lack of knowing what the fuck to do with yourself otherwise ...better draw a line and stop altogether.

2.You have to "bring up" yourself, cultivate your own personality, because even if your partens try to do it, they can not! This is a lot of responsibility for a 15y.o. but i wish i would have understood that sooner.

3.Meditate, learn spending time with "yourself" The reason why most adults are not happy / not where they wanna be in life is not because they haven´t "done" the right things, but they got distracted into doing too much shit that kept them from beeing at their core and meditation can definatly help you avoid this huge trap - maybe the no.1 trap of life.

4. Concerning you don´t feel fullfilled ...for me in retrospective it had a lot to do with the friends i choose...especially when i was 17/18+ Don´t hang around with people you only have a good time with when you take drugs or play video games ...THOSE people are not real friends ...they are just other victims, they can´t and they won´t help you!! Even if it is hard i wish i would have stayed away from those people in retrospective..

hope this helps  

Edited July 31, 2016 by Falk

[Lorcan]

I am currently playing alot of videogames. The Problem is I dont know what to do , what am I to do? I remeber we had internet cut off from my house for 3 weeks I got so bored I stole a limestone rock from my neighbors garden and began carving it into a face with 1 blunt rock as a hammer and 1 sharp rock as a chisel(extremely fucking slow but it works) I asked my dad for a chisel ,he didnt have one but he gave mr this tool that was used for touching up bricks which worked semi effiecntly. Then eventually I got a chisel and a hammer. I havent donr any work on my stone face in thr past few weeks.

What do you want me to do? Start chiseling my rock again?

Draw nature with paper and pencil.

Jump on a website and learn about something that interests me?

Video games tell me exactly what to do.

When Im not playing video games , Im lost. What am I supposed to do?

What should I be doing?

And dont give me a vague answer on what I should be doing.

I have no idea. Im lost. What should I be doing, what shouldnt.

What do you want me to do tommorow? See I just automatically jump on and play some video games as I dont know what I should be working towards.

Its all very vague. Very very vague. If I could describe self actualization the one word, Id use is vague. But leo would argue it is specfic. Thing is ,the information being told to me.is vague so I dont know what to do.

Give me answers that I can tae action on

 

 

 

 

[30secs]

@Lorcan

hehe..I got amused by  your carving stone story, but do you meditate? I found meditation boring first but after year of consistent meditation- oh I wish I have more time to do it(since Im working 9-5 even saturdays). But seriously meditation is the most important TO DO RIGHT NOW!

[ttm]

6 hours ago, Lorcan said:

Its all very vague. Very very vague. If I could describe self actualization the one word, Id use is vague. But leo would argue it is specfic. Thing is ,the information being told to me.is vague so I dont know what to do.

Give me answers that I can tae action on

Read books. All books you can find on subject. Even if you can't understand most of it at first. Everything seems vague at first and grasping things require constant practice. But with time anything you keep doing becomes an effortless part of your experience. Think about how many years you learned the language you are speaking now so effortlessly. Don't allow yourself to get frustrated from not getting results immediately and get the inspiration and motivation to continue from even the smallest improvements. Learning curve really is exponential, it can take months or even years without apparent progress, but it'll start to unfold eventually, and then it takes a rocket to previously unimaginable heights.

And of course, as others said, continue meditating. It might be the most important habit one can ever create.

"To a mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders." - Lao Tzu

[Lorcan]

5 hours ago, 30secs said:

@Lorcan

hehe..I got amused by  your carving stone story, but do you meditate? I found meditation boring first but after year of consistent meditation- oh I wish I have more time to do it(since Im working 9-5 even saturdays). But seriously meditation is the most important TO DO RIGHT NOW!

Yes I do meditatation. I do minimum 20 minutes, but occasionaly I do it for longer.

[Lorcan]

4 hours ago, ttm said:

Read books. All books you can find on subject. Even if you can't understand most of it at first. Everything seems vague at first and grasping things require constant practice. But with time anything you keep doing becomes an effortless part of your experience. Think about how many years you learned the language you are speaking now so effortlessly. Don't allow yourself to get frustrated from not getting results immediately and get the inspiration and motivation to continue from even the smallest improvements. Learning curve really is exponential, it can take months or even years without apparent progress, but it'll start to unfold eventually, and then it takes a rocket to previously unimaginable heights.

And of course, as others said, continue meditating. It might be the most important habit one can ever create.

"To a mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders." - Lao Tzu

So you want me to read books huh? Finally an answer I can take some action upon, I will read more then. I haven't been reading my self help books as much as I should (some of the language if Marcus Aurelius meditations is hard to grasp)

[ttm]

14 minutes ago, Lorcan said:

So you want me to read books huh? Finally an answer I can take some action upon, I will read more then. I haven't been reading my self help books as much as I should (some of the language if Marcus Aurelius meditations is hard to grasp)

It's not so much that I want you to read books, but that if you want to grasp things, you want to read books. And the sooner you get from the position "I should read books" to "I want read books", the easier it becomes (obviously..). And remember that if it's so hard to read some books that you just can't get it done, there's no need to get stuck. It's better to skip a book and start another one already, than to not read at all.

[Ayla]

On 7/29/2016 at 10:14 PM, Lorcan said:

Why do I feel unfulfilled?

 

You've received GREAT advice here. 

Did it help? If so, that is great! If not, what is still missing? Or what is it that is too much? 

 

[Lorcan]

On 08/11/2016 at 0:56 PM, Ayla said:

You've received GREAT advice here. 

Did it help? If so, that is great! If not, what is still missing? Or what is it that is too much? 

 

So far Ive been told I have a false belief. That there is no self.

Ive been told to buy the book mastery.

Ive been told to meditate.

Ive been told to do less video games

Ive been told to put pen to paper(do action upon what I learn)

Read books and have patience.

Do things that are meaningful and bring meaning

Dont have dodgey friends

Devlop I want to learn.

Etc

This is all great advice,but not what I was looking for. However dont worry about it. What wormon posted above is what I was looking for. I know exactly what to do from what he has said.

 

 

[Lorcan]

Btw on waking up early, how many hours of sleep do you need.

I heard some people make due with just 5 hours

[Lorcan]

How will I wake up without alerting others in my house sleeping lol

[J. M. Wigglesworth]

@Lorcan

There's a lot of things we can recommend you. I see people are already leading to dissolve your ego and rid yourself of addictions. Good advice, good perspective to have and even better to pursue. But I wouldn't recommend you start on those yet.

On 7/29/2016 at 2:14 PM, Lorcan said:

What could I be doing more?

 Dozens of things. And each of those dozens of things could add tremendous value to your life. A better question is what do I want more of? This will naturally answer your titular question: Why should I be doing right now?

 

On 7/29/2016 at 2:14 PM, Lorcan said:

Why do I feel unfulfilled?

Do you actually want to be fulfilled? A lot of people say it but their actions don't match. How much your actions are fulfilling to you? If it's not a significant percentage then it's no mystery why you aren't fulfilled. Do draw your state from within aka. do you specifically create fulfillment within yourself and let it overflow from every pore of your being. My guess is no. Fulfillment won't drop from the skies just cause you did a few 'higher consciousness' activities for a few months. You've got to clearly summon it into your life with actions and intention.

 

I'd like to say I'm glad you're getting into personal dev. at such a young age but I think this is more important: give yourself time to grow and the patience to persevere through the growth process. If you wanted a to-do list, I'm giving it to you now. Build your ability to tolerate complexity and nuance. Clean up your diet. Learn to manage your focus and awareness. Build up work ethic and nourishing habits. Don't stagnate in circle-jerk, rationalizations, delusion and pointless categorization. Do it slowly, thouroughly.

Do those things so you can become somebody who can do the hard hitting inner work that many people rarely touch. Life purpose, dissolving ego, embodying true love and peace, knowing Truth. That's real shit. It can be in your life. It can be your very existence. But if you aren't even capable of understanding the concepts, being open-minded enough to tolerate them,disciplined enough to pursue them, aware/sensitive enough to experience them... let me put this another way. If this is a self-development baseball game, your job right now is to get yourself and a bat onto that first plate. Forget swinging, the guys in the outfield, the way the pitcher is fiddling with the ball. Forget it. You're fourteen years old. Don't be discouraged by that either. Lay down the fundamentals.  

 

 

[Lorcan]

4 hours ago, J. M. Wigglesworth said:

If you wanted a to-do list, I'm giving it to you now. Build your ability to tolerate complexity and nuance. Clean up your diet. Learn to manage your focus and awareness. Build up work ethic and nourishing habits. Don't stagnate in circle-jerk, rationalizations, delusion and pointless categorization. Do it slowly, thouroughly.

I want specifics!

 When I wake up morning , what should I do every hour, Fill in this template scheduling what I am supposed to be doing. So I know exactly what to do, so I don't end playing advanced sudoko for 3 hours because you said "Build you ability to tolerate complexity and Nuance"

(Note: Dont overload on the meditation, I can handle about an hour, possibly 2 buts that's pushing it)

 

10:00am -

11:00am-

12:00am-

1:00pm-

2:00pm-

3:00pm-

4:00pm-

5:00pm-

6:00pm-

7:00pm-

8:00pm-

9:00pm-

10:00pm-

11:00pm-

Note : I would wake up earlier but I cant mess up my family sleep schedules, dont want to wake them up early.