What Should I Be Doing Right Now?

[ttm]

Counter-Note:  If you are sleeping in your own room, consider buying a light alarm (or blackmail your parents to buy one for you). It's easy to wake up without making noise when artificial sun shines through your eyelids.

[Eelco1981]

@Lorcan Hi Lorcan. I am 35 years old and one thing I regret  the most is doing what others (and society) told me what is good for me. I am not saying that good advice does not exist, I am saying you should listen to yourself more. Do the inner work. If you play videogames you don't listen to yourself. Meditating is a good start. You are 14 years old, way ahead of what I was doing at your age. So some practical advice:

1. Keep on meditating. Don't miss a day.
2. Practice the process of Mastery (see the book by George Leonard). You should find a hobby or sport you like to practice Mastery. See if you like, running, fitness, tennis, soccer, baseball, karate, boxing, etc. Or maybe playing an instrument: piano, violin, drums, guitar? Maybe singing, painting, carving stones... but really seriously getting good at it.
3. Give every activity a fair shot of at least 3 months. It either brings you closer to your life purpose or gives you answers of what is definitely NOT you calling.
4. AND also do some stupid shit a 14 year old should be doing: masturbate, try to get a girl friend, get drunk, make 1000 mistakes, get angry, get sad. Observe every life experience, learn from it, become more and more conscious. Learning that these things do not give you happiness is also learning. Making mistakes and learn from them: grow up. Because if you 'should' yourself too much, your 'should nots' will eventually backfire on you. See Leo's video "how to stop moralizing".

Success!

 

[Lorcan]

I have read the book mastery partially, I found it boring. Perhaps I should read over it again from the start.

[Eelco1981]

5 minutes ago, Lorcan said:

I have read the book mastery partially, I found it boring. Perhaps I should read over it again from the start.

First Mastery challenge: reading a book . hahahha.

[Samuel Garcia]

@Lorcan That was the first self help book I read just  over a year ago (as a 17 year old) when I stumbled upon Actualized.org and Leo recommended it. I thought it was quite boring too. Then I re-read it two weeks ago and found it quite profound. I realized why people liked it so much. I'm sure if you cultivate a desire to personal growth, you will see that self-help books are really appealing.  

One key to Mastery is surrender. Surrender to the emptiness you feel when you read  a book.

[J. M. Wigglesworth]

12 hours ago, Lorcan said:

I want specifics!

You want specifics? Specifics for what? What are you trying to accomplish? The list I gave you were some key points to hit if you want to build a foundation that would enable you to pursue the more potent dimensions of self-actualization. I recommend this to you because you said yourself you didn't know what you wanted. If you figure out what you want, we can recommend you tools to get it and you can build your own schedule far better than we can. The domain of self-actualization is vast, even if you can't find settle on some ultimate pursuit, you should at least pick out something worth your time.

Judging from what you're currently doing, how about...

• Life purpose?
• Reading three high-quality books/videos a week to flesh out your understanding.
• Infusing yourself with a deep satisfaction.

Pick something. Anything. When people go to a nutrition specialist, the dietician asks them what they want before they design the diet. There are things which are good to do regardless of what you want(meditation and reading) but tailor-made requires a clear vision. If you can pick something that really excites you, something that stirs your core I'll give you three things you can do to reach it and you can work out your own schedule.

[Lorcan]

Running, Stone Sculpture/Carving , Public speaking. PennyStock trading, Javascript/C# coding are things I don't mind doing.

 

I guess also do science, Pyschology, Sociology ,Philosophy etc but that kind of fits in with reading and what I read.

Edited August 14, 2016 by Lorcan

[Christian]

There are lots of areas in life that you should be spending time working on every day - yes I said should

Meditation - like you said you are doing. That is great keep that habit up every day. Maybe even add a self inquiry habit some time in the future to help you reach enlightenment. 

Life purpose: Find your life purpose as soon as possible and align yourself with it every day. Leo's life purpose course can help with that.

Relationships/dating: You need to learn how relationships work and how to date girls if you have an authentic desire for this and or want the benefis of what relationships can bring you. But if you do not really care, focus more on the other areas, but still work on it to an extend - it teaches you communication skills that are important to know in life.. 

Studying: Become a life long learner and learn how to learn. Take notes and study those notes to remember what you learn and improve your writing. 

You are still very young - 14 years old - so lucky. So take your time. Build good habits (one at a time) that support you in these critical areas of life and you should be good.. 

 

[PetarKa]

Hey, I'm 16 y.o. and I can totally relate to you! I started doing this personal development stuff around 14 years and I can tell you what's worked for me. Here are 2 pieces of advice:

1. Do not stop with personal development, I know the first 1-2 years are ruff and you don't know how self help will fit in with the rest of your life. I know it sounds cheesy, but do not fall of the track. It WILL come through!

2. Study Leo's 'Advice for High-school and college students' video. Watch it over and over because there are A LOT of amazing pieces of wisdom. If you take that video seriously, man, your life will literally jumpstart!

[MIARIVEL]

@Lorcan I am very impressed that a 14 year old is focusing his time on reading books on personal development and wanting to improve himself and his lifestyle choices.

I think at this age it is normal to kill time every now and then to do some fun things. 

However if you want to feel like your living a more structured and productive life, I would suggest making a list of what your ideal day would look like and instead of trying to make major changes at once, you can start incorporating bits by bits into your daily routine. 

Time to write down some goals and the time frames in which you wish to achieve certain goals. This helps with feeling more productive like you are not wasting time as well as being satisfied and happy with how you choose to spend your time. 

Some things I would of told my 14 year old self:

* Read as many personal development, psychology, understanding human behaviour and self mastery books as you can as this will be very rewarding for you in the future

* Don't invest too much of yourself and time in intimate relationships and if you do (because your so in love with someone) don't allow it to consume you. Make sure you learn independence from a young age and keep doing what makes you happy - running, spending time with friends, studying. Don't ever stop your life for someone else. 

* I used to hate studying but I wish I put all my effort into being the best I could be at school. Its pays off later believe me. Education is important. 

* Always put your health first, it is easy putting off little things like regular Dr appointments, dentists even your psychological, mental and emotional health - always put this first so you can always do whatever you want to do at your best self. 

* Stop watching so much TV and reading gossip magazines and if its not helping you grow and educating you - then it is a waste of time and if you do choose to do these things, don't spend hours consumed in it. 

* Learn emotional intelligence and how to be mentally tough. There will be so many challenging situations that will test you in life and if you develop a strong frame of mind and learn to control your emotions and mindset - this will be the greatest tool you could ever have throughout life as you will be able to handle any situation a lot stronger, smarter and wiser. 

They are just a few tips, hope this helps. 

 

[Lawrence]

Check out this book! I found it really helpful! - I know you'll benefit greatly from it IF you put it into practice.

It's called The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson and it is about creating positive, simple habits and doing them over and over again until the compound effect kicks in, it's pretty simple to do and it's pretty simple not to do. 

It really changes your perspective towards the simple, daily habits.

https://www.amazon.com/Slight-Edge-Turning-Disciplines-Happiness/dp/1626340463/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1471619961&sr=1-1&keywords=the+slight+edge

[Lorcan]

Thank you all for the insights. It helps.

Video games consume most of my time. You can make time go way to fast while playing. But with other hobbies time is relatively slow. I was chipping away at my stone face sculpture for about an hour, in the last 5 minutes the nose fell off it (I probably hit the rock too hard).

Then after that I went inside and read a bit of books. Does anyone know any advice for reading books without getting a sore neck, its annoying to have to look down at the book all the time, sure I can hold the book up but my arms can only hold it up for so long. Does it even matter if I look down to read books? I dont want permnanent neck damage from looking down for long periods.  I did google it and nothing of much value was coming up except for some thing that actually holds the book in front of you.

I dont know why I spend so much time playing video games. Maybe I need anthoer hobby on top of Stone Masonry. Or should I increase the amount of time I chisel my stone.

Im increasing my meditation time, Infact I did an hour today.

 

I will have to sort out my room for school.