After i turned 16, I decided to take a lot of time to sort through my childhood and get my life together. I also started dedicating a lot of time to self improvement and awareness. Even though I don't have anything serious going on emotionally anymore, it's something that I enjoy and really get a lot of fulfillment and joy from.  But I noticed that it wasn't long til my old friends didn't resonate with me anymore. I figured that maybe I just needed a change of scenery or that I simply outgrew my friends and that I'll find another group of friends. Currently, I have a lot of acquaintances who think I'm fun to be around and am good at having "deep" fulfilling conversations (I put deep in quotes because that's what other people have told me but I don't see it as such. I'm just being my regular self and explaining my views on reality).   But I have yet to find a group of friends I really resonate with. Sometimes I also get the remark "oh i thought you were older because of the way you carry yourself. You just seem very put together." I've also had people who were intimidated by me as well even though at least from my end, I wasn't really doing anything except being myself.  There is nothing wrong with them and I'm happy to just remain acquaintances but I don't think trying to be close friends with people who are intimidated by me is the most sustainable. I got in a relationship like that, ignoring my instincts, and even though it started out okay, i had to get out because I realized that a power dynamic was forming and this person was becoming emotionally codependent which isn't good for either one of us.  Also this is especially frustrating because I keep attracting men who are 8-12 years older than me (I'm 20 btw). I never had a sketchy situation with these guys but usually after having a conversation and after they ask me for my number, I usually tell them my age and they apologize and back off (which is great because then I know they aren't trying to creep on young girls). But I do recognize that I am the common denominator in these situations so I think I'm the problem. It's frustrating because I haven't had a guy my age hit on me since I was 16.  I have pretty much have looked the same since that age and the only thing that I would say is different is the way I do my hair and my makeup, so it's not like I physically look a lot older.  It's really annoying and I want it to stop but until I find a way to fix this I'm going to resort to telling people that I am "born in the 2000s" and enjoy their shocked reactions (I mean it's a lie but honestly, its close enough to my actual birthday lol).   I'm not sure if the trauma "aged" me. I grew up with a lot happening in my childhood and I was exposed to many responsibilities from a young age that I believe forced me to grow up faster emotionally. On top of that, I also think that sorting through the trauma and additional self development also "aged" me further because I think I came out of it wiser and more at peace.  I haven't had a group of friends in a few years and while I'm at peace most of the time since I really enjoy solitude and being alone with my thoughts, I'm not gonna lie, sometimes it does get lonely and I do start wondering if something is wrong with me.  Even writing this I'm like "I hope to god that i don't come off as one of those assholes who are all like i"Am MoRE mAtuRe thAn EvERYOne mY aGE." I'm simply explaining how I feel and my current situation. I am open to seeing what people on this forum has to say whether that is talking about their experiences, giving any advice, or even calling out any bs that i might be missing in regards to my own psyche.