Is Having Had Only A Single Girlfriend Okay?

[Daniel Miheilov]

Both of us : 19
Met in school, were in same class
Were going out for just about a year
Going to the same uni

We were planning on renting a place and living together, since the uni is in a different city from the one we live in. Then thoughts started creeping up about how I'd probably live with her for the rest of my life if it happened that way. She's my first girlfriend and I'm her first boyfriend. So basically all of the relationship experience we have is with each other.
Sounds kind of bad to have only had one girlfriend your whole life. Started thinking hard about it. I'm not quite sure what love is and whether I "love" her and that didn't help. Am I really happy with her? Would I be happier with another girl? It's not that I'm UNhappy with her but really, having only one girlfriend? She's quite serious about spending the rest of her life with me and I'm not sure she's thought it through very well either.
So I decided I did want another girlfriend. I mean - isn't this period of my life - college - the time to be exploring, getting experience with at least 2 or 3 girls so I see what I like and I don't? 
Took action and now we've broken up. That was a month ago. She was quite shaken at first but now there are no bad feelings between us. She does want me back, though. And she's thought quite a lot during this month. It's not that I really disliked her or anything so it's sort of hard to keep saying no to her - she is indeed trying hard to prove herself.
I'm wondering what to do about this now. 
Breaking up with her now means that if I want another girlfriend I have to work for it so that's potentially a ton of growth.
Being with the actual new girl would also be a very fresh experience (not that the previous relationship got stale...I mean it'd only been for a year) and should bring new insights
And I mean come on, only having sex with one girl my whole life?
Well...is it actually that bad?

Lost on this choice, have no idea which option is better. Will keep thinking about it but want third party opinions on whether it's bad to miss out on the experience I could have dating other girls as opposed to staying in this engaging relationship.
 

[Emerald]

8 minutes ago, Daniel Miheilov said:

Both of us : 19
Met in school, were in same class
Were going out for just about a year
Going to the same uni

We were planning on renting a place and living together, since the uni is in a different city from the one we live in. Then thoughts started creeping up about how I'd probably live with her for the rest of my life if it happened that way. She's my first girlfriend and I'm her first boyfriend. So basically all of the relationship experience we have is with each other.
Sounds kind of bad to have only had one girlfriend your whole life. Started thinking hard about it. I'm not quite sure what love is and whether I "love" her and that didn't help. Am I really happy with her? Would I be happier with another girl? It's not that I'm UNhappy with her but really, having only one girlfriend? She's quite serious about spending the rest of her life with me and I'm not sure she's thought it through very well either.
So I decided I did want another girlfriend. I mean - isn't this period of my life - college - the time to be exploring, getting experience with at least 2 or 3 girls so I see what I like and I don't? 
Took action and now we've broken up. That was a month ago. She was quite shaken at first but now there are no bad feelings between us. She does want me back, though. And she's thought quite a lot during this month. It's not that I really disliked her or anything so it's sort of hard to keep saying no to her - she is indeed trying hard to prove herself.
I'm wondering what to do about this now. 
Breaking up with her now means that if I want another girlfriend I have to work for it so that's potentially a ton of growth.
Being with the actual new girl would also be a very fresh experience (not that the previous relationship got stale...I mean it'd only been for a year) and should bring new insights
And I mean come on, only having sex with one girl my whole life?
Well...is it actually that bad?

Lost on this choice, have no idea which option is better. Will keep thinking about it but want third party opinions on whether it's bad to miss out on the experience I could have dating other girls as opposed to staying in this engaging relationship.
 

I would explain to her exactly what your feelings are. There's a chance she worries about the sexual variety aspect as well. Say that you want to take a break and come back to the relationship another time. Then, try out the sexual variety thing. Date a little bit. If, in a year's period of time, you still want to continue the relationship, ask her out again. You don't want to have regrets. But if you really are happy and you just feel obligated to date more because someone else told you you should, then definitely stay in the relationship. You have to really be in tune with what you want.

[egoeimai]

Daniel theres no right or wrong

Should or shouldnt

Its like : do whatever you want.

Dont think about judging

[Daniel Miheilov]

While I understand where you are coming from with these answers, my question is simply : Is it invaluable experience that I'd be missing were I to only date a single girl in my life
There is no replacement she can give me for actually getting to know other girls, mind and body. Is it a truly important thing I'd skip over?

[egoeimai]

For these questions i had in the past ,noone could have given me an answer i wanted to hear.

You would rather ask yourself because only u can answer. You must know what u want.arent you?

Edited July 29, 2016 by popi

[FirstglimpseOMG]

Being true to your gut feelings while at the same time treating her as you would like to be treated if the tables were turned may be a great way of approaching it.

Not sure about it all? It's probably perfect that you are not sure. Maybe the exact situation doesn't seem to resolve itself within you with ease, and maybe it just not meant to right now.

In my opinion, from readimg your post, this young you is very likely already doing most things relationship-oriented very well when it comes to how you respect her and treat her. Likely she is someone that is also already intrinsically capable of appreciating your honesty and genuineness. Otherwise you would likely have a pissed off, petulant little sulker on your hands. Maybe also likely, since both of you are pretty naturally in a good place personally in your early development, with or without a big, commited relationship, you are both already ahead in the game of life. Man, if you can do the important 'I need to look for what's best for me right now in my life', without making her feel 'less than'...?  Sounds like the definition of the beginning of the development of what a real, genuine, not-selfish, friendship can be.

Probably not a bad platform to base yourself on while figuring what your your gut feelings or questions are going to bring you as you just chill and live and figure it all out as you go.

Imagine the world if everyone just gave out some basic love, understanding and respect to all while trying to figure out just what the fuck they're all about. Surely a fantasy, but my impression from your post was that you are already basically running with integrity, regardless of unsureness of what race you may be in, and how important it may or may not be to you at this time. 

Sounds like you're trying to keep it real while not forgetting about what your needs may be as you figure them out at any given time. That doesn't sound wimpy and selfish and needlessly unsure to me, that sounds like a good place to work from, and I imagine that operating with a base integrity towards yourself and others will ...well, I just don't see that 'not working' for you.

Hats off bud, enjoy the shit out of your positive relationship with others, be they friend, colleage, lover, whatever. Pick those peope well, and with and expecting the same level of strivance towards personal integrity that you are developing now. Just simply enjoy it all, I think that's what life is for. 

[QandC]

Smh... watch and learn

Edited July 31, 2016 by Quizzer

[ArabiaNytes]

@Daniel MiheilovMiheilov

Clearly you are not content with just being with one person so soon in life. Nothing wrong with that, so long as a person is open about their doubts and they don't cheat.

My man and I have been each other's one and only since senior year in high school. Eight years comin up soon...

I have asked him this question a MILLION times and he's reassured me, "Without a doubt." And I trust him. 

Trust yourself. Take your time. Better to make slow and true decisions, than quick and regretful ones. It's not fair to either of you.