Overcoming Fear? Resources? Lifestyle? Techniques?

[electroBeam]

I've lately been feeling super motivated and energised to face all of my fears, from pickup artistry, to confronting business partners, customers, clients, risking jail and bankruptcy.

To those of you who have a huge passion to face your fears: What are some of the scariest pickup attempts you've done? What are the scariest risks you've taken for business? What have you told business partners that was highly confrontational and disapproving? What experiences have you had pissing off customers or family or other things? What are some experiences you've had where you stood your ground for the greater good? Where you risked being disowned by your social circle, prestigious business or career related contacts, deeply loved family members, religious associations, etc. What gave you the courage to overcome it? Has anyone here risked death, jail, bankruptcy or massive loss for the greater good? How was it?

What do you do to overcome those fears? What are some moments where you remember being super scared about doing something, and what helped you or how did you overcome that fear?

I'm going to have access to psychedelics in about 3 months. Is this a good way of overcoming fears? 

Some things I've done: quit college, asked my boss for a payrise, asked my boss for more time off work, approached women on the street, confronted my business partner over my needs especially when his values are different to mine, been blunt and fierce with 3rd party business partners about big decisions in my company, lived in a country that didn't speak english and was dangerous, said 'yes I can do it' to enormously challenging software and engineering projects that I felt really out of my depth in, etc. 

[Lyubov]

considering i've peered into the abyss and went to hell and back and went on a trip where I was tortured for hours by demons there is virtually nothing scary to me now about talking to girls on the street, it's literally one of the silliest things to be scared of and is entirely in your head due to a lack of loving yourself fully for who you are, someone who deserves love 

Edited May 25, 2020 by Lyubov

[DreamScape]

I'd say kundalini is a good resource here. In the past you have mentioned that you were questionable about doing it, although to me it seems like the best option for emotional change. 

[Preety_India]

 

I once transferred my whole bank account into a financial investment. 

Couldn't sleep for 3 days. Because of s some technical error both my bank account (because of zero balance) and my investment account were locked. I had some cash with me  to survive for a week. I kept calling my bank and my investment company constantly throughout the week out of sheer panic and they weren't able to fix it. 

I thought I had lost all my savings. But eventually they were able to sort out the issue and transfer 50% of it into my bank account but the rest was lost in trades. 

That's the greatest financial risk I have taken so far for my investment business. 

The other risks I took are 

 

Religious or social risk. 

I took the risk of telling my family 10 years ago when I was 17 that I wanted to be a Christian. They were not approving of it. I converted to Christianity against their will

But they were about to out me completely at some point. Also my social circle at that time wasn't happy with my decision. So I risked losing everyone for my quest for Christianity. I did it anyway. I lost some friends but I remained firm. 

The other risk was getting over my phobia of the dark. And I have finally succeeded. This took many years. 

 

Job risk

I was working in an investment company a few years ago and the schedule was brutal. Working for more than 10 hours a day and low pay. It started to impact my health pretty bad. I decided to confront my boss about the pay and cruel working hours. I stood up to my boss who threatened me that I would lose my job. Guess what. I lost that job. I left that job and got another one. 

 

Second job. 

In this job I was facing discrimination from a female boss. It was an all male project team and I was the only female. She was my boss but she was sabotaging my work probably some jealous issues because I was doing better than most guys there. Some of the guys then started harassing me at work and stealing my work, hacking into my emails. These guys would butter up the female boss to win her favor. I didn't believe in buttering up a boss but in honest hard work and excellence.. I confronted my female boss with all the harassment the males were subjecting me to, but instead of being supportive she dismissed me with the threat I'd get fired. She then transferred to me an unrelated department where the work was bad, pay was less and I had no experience in that department. I quit because of all the office politics and took up another job in an event management company that i work with now. And I'm very happy I took the risk of quitting a mentally and physically unhealthy job. 

 

Relationship Risk

I'm currently in a relationship with an American white man. This is an interracial relationship. My family is not very supportive of it. But I take the risk nevertheless. I live my life on my own terms. 

 

Family risk

Confronting my Bipolar mother 

I confronted my bipolar mother early this year to get therapy and medication. I knew that it would lead to a violent confrontation between her and me. And I'm terribly scared of her. Yet I decided to tell her the truth anyway.. Since then she has been reflecting on it and I have managed to convince her and take her to a few appointments before the Corona. 

So those are all the risks I have taken and I continue to take some of them.

 

Tip to overcome fear. 

Only one tip  from me

Believe in Yourself. 

 

Edited May 26, 2020 by Preety_India

[EnlightenmentBlog]

I'm a shy and introverted person. My fear stems from social interactions with strangers  and/or large groups of people.

I've approached girls in broad daylight, stuttering and shaking.

I'm in uni, I've given presentations to whole auditoriums with a dry mouth and cracking lame jokes.

But I did it anyway. It helped. But the fear is still there. I guess if I did it a lot I'd overcome it.

I don't think you can overcome fear for situations in life you feel uncomfortable. Isn't it like every other emotion? You're supposed to feel it and use it as guidance. Some fears are helpful. Some are not, but you're there to distinguish between the two.

Edited May 26, 2020 by EnlightenmentBlog

[DreamScape]

Also a tip. Fear is resistance. So its a good idea to internally embrace the fear, rather than pushing through it. You can't fight resistance with resistance. Nor can you fight it.

Edited May 26, 2020 by DreamScape

[allislove]

Agree with @EnlightenmentBlog, just do it ?

Took 5-MeO huge dose with shaman as a first psychedelic experience. Looking back, that was really brave of me ?

[EnlightenmentBlog]

35 minutes ago, Meta-Man said:

The secret to life is to die before you die’

Take care of the root of fear, and everything else will naturally fall away

Theoretically, that's true. But you'll need years to accomplish that. Some fears are hardwired in your system they arise automatically when the situation presents itself. What do you do in the meantime? 

[EnlightenmentBlog]

32 minutes ago, Meta-Man said:

It’s not theoretically true, it’s true in practice.

Maybe. Maybe you'll shit yourself when you see a lion charging towards you.

[Javfly33]

Surrender to what the thought about that fear tells you.

If the thought "sells you" the story that that thing you are going to do means death (I agree 100% with @Meta-Man here, if you are consciouss enough when you are feeling fear or anxiety you WILL realize that the thought is literally threatening you with DEATH).

Basically surrender and be Ok with you dying, then the thought won´t be able to prevent you of doing whatever you want to want to do, because you already have accepted the worst scenario possible.

And yes, psychedelics can help a lot with this. But of course it will be as hard as doing it in normal life, the difference is in a psychedelic you won´t be able to avoid it. That´s why it´s they are so effective.

 

Edited May 27, 2020 by Javfly33

[EnlightenmentBlog]

1 hour ago, Meta-Man said:

Sure, the body has a basic survival function. But what if I’m not the body?

That basic survival function is YOU. 

@Meta-Man @Javfly33 What are your fears?

I understand what you're saying and I've tried it. But then survival kicks in all this enlightenment theory flies out of the window for me.

No matter how much you meditate or take psychedelics or journal there will come a situation in your life when fear will arise and

logic and theory won't be able to help. That's life.

[Nahm]

How do I face what I’m creating & projecting. Dunno. Maybe face the fact that I am doing so. 

This would mean “face” is in a way, a critical misnomer. 

Hard to face what is not actually an object to a subject, which could be faced.

[Javfly33]

23 minutes ago, EnlightenmentBlog said:

That basic survival function is YOU. 

@Meta-Man @Javfly33 What are your fears?

I understand what you're saying and I've tried it. But then survival kicks in all this enlightenment theory flies out of the window for me.

No matter how much you meditate or take psychedelics or journal there will come a situation in your life when fear will arise and

logic and theory won't be able to help. That's life.

No, the survival function is just a mechanism, is not your identity.

The problem is identifying with the body and thoughts. If you identify obviously you will fall "victim" of the fear when the body and mind wants to avoid something to stay in homeostasis/safety.

Being consciouss is not a theory, is a state.

If I've been able to be more happy and relaxed this last months, is because I raised my state. So when thoughts of fear and or anxiety and sensations in the body arised, instead of going along with them, I have been able to surrender to them a little bit more because deep down I wasn't that sure anymore I was this body anymore. This won't work if it's a belief or a theory, you must be conscious in that moment that you are NOT any object! 

Basically it's as "simple" as raising your state high enough you know you are not your sensations or thoughts. Of course I can't guarantee you if that in a precise moment of your life when fear arises you will be conscious enough or you will be lost in identity. I guess enlightenment is about that. Stabilizing that conscioussness so you don't forget who you are.

[Nahm]

@Javfly33

Nice. Hard to be serious while being sincere. 

[EnlightenmentBlog]

@Nahm Good old projection card you use, works every time.

@Javfly33 Fair enough.

I got the impression in this thread that we were opening up about our fears, thus showing that we're only human as @Preety_India did.

Then you come barging in with enlightenment talk that we all know works cos we're kind of on the same page.

So what are your fears? When were you fearful in your life and how did you cope then? 

[Nahm]

1 hour ago, EnlightenmentBlog said:

Good old projection card you use, works every time.

One mans’ ‘card’ is another’s obviousness of truth so to speak. I’m confident @electroBeam is aware of a distinction between creating reality and psychological projection. Triggers are devine clues imo, and most worthy of inspection. 

[EnlightenmentBlog]

 @Meta-Man Good answer. Thank you.

@Nahm Now you pulled out the "one man's trash is another man's treasure" relativity card. You're full of tricks. 

Let me bring out mine. "Kill the Buddha", no, "Finger pointing to the Moon", also no, "Zen Devil", not quite right, "Reverse Uno" ... wait that's

not from my enlightenment pack, but it could work. I use the "Reverse Uno".

What if you're projecting your solutions onto non-existing problems? What if you're imagining truth where there is non?

 

PS: I'm messing with you. I'd still play though.

[Mystica45]

You dont want to overcome fear. Stop lying to yourself

Edited May 27, 2020 by Mystica45

[Nahm]

9 hours ago, EnlightenmentBlog said:

Some fears are hardwired in your system they arise automatically when the situation presents itself

This is an example of one of those non existent problems. 

5 hours ago, EnlightenmentBlog said:

projection card you use, works every time.

Your wisdom is solid. 

[Aaron p]

You automatically bypass all fear and become a ruthless motherfucker by focusing on awakening haha