The need to be alone, and lack of connection

[kundalini91]

I have had a lot of mystical experiences the last year, mainly through a lot of work on self-love, psychedelics, meditating in float tanks etc...

So i´ve come across new people the last year, especially older awakened people.. have gotten one good friend which is 40 and another one which is a woman and she is 50.. i am only 28 which does not matter... And the thing is i did not like to be alone when i was younger, because i did not enjoy my own company and did not like myself very much.

At the moment i have a beautiful girlfriend which loves me and i love her,we are currently looking for a house as we live in her mothers basement... So the relationship has been through it´s ups and downs, but i think relationships also can be tough mirrors and acting as catalyst for change for both parts.

The thing is a lot of the guys i grew up with, friends from childhood and the dudes i have had in my life does not feel like they resonate as much with me any longer,

every time i am with them i kinda get bored and lack connection... so i spend more time alone now than ever. And it feels like a byproduct of my awakening.

People can say all they want about self-love and loving the universe, cause if i stay in heart, my awakened self (the original one) with a lot of the people i have had around me since childhood, i feel i don´t get accepted for who i am.

So i am wondering as one awakens to truth - consciousness do we attract being who resonates on the same level of consciousness, do friendships fade more away for periods of time?

The truth is i don´t want to be so much around especially my older brother (who talks all the time) and screams for attention.. and i don´t enjoy time with my friends the same way any longer.. it´s quite sad but have anyone else went through the same experience?

wanting to be more alone? especially in nature, family really annoying cause they trigger your old self like Ram Dass quote: if you think you are enlightened go spend a week with your family.. And it feels like i am experiencing Ego backlash as well, my old self vanishing more and more, and then it comes back again, i make myself small around the people i grew up with.. family and friends. Maybe i am quite not ready yet, and there is a lot more to learn i guess. Especially when i am only 28. 

But on the other side i think we as humans are going through a very special time on the earth, more and more people waking up to the truth of oneness and nonduality.

And i notice my self asking a lot of questions here, i would appreciate similar stories, even though i have all the answers inside.. 

[allislove]

Great that you are on the path.

"The need to be alone, and lack of connection" is a belief. Does this belief feel good to you? I guess, no.
Do you have a dream board? Write what you want, let go of the limited beliefs.
Nothing is wrong with the world. World is you, and it's Love. 

[Peo]

28 minutes ago, kundalini91 said:

So i am wondering as one awakens to truth - consciousness do we attract being who resonates on the same level of consciousness, do friendships fade more away for periods of time?

I have friendships that is not sustainable and i will in the future have to find some new friends. My friends are a part of my old self. Also when i tell my friends that i do psychedelics they think i will destroy my life if i do drugs. My always try  to convice me why i should stop takeing pshychedelics. They are very closedminded to psychedelics, even tho many millions of people do them  every  year.

Edited May 24, 2020 by Peo
grammer