Espaim

I plan on being 100% honest. What should I expect?

22 posts in this topic

Starting right now.

I'm shitting my pants just thinking this. I'm currently reading Radical Honesty. Holy shit.

I fear that I'll lose some friends and people will start being polarizing towards me.

I won't be able to please the same people I used to hang out.

I won't have any excuses to do shitty acts or not do what I actually want to do.

I don't feel secure on where this behaviour will take me.

Maybe I'll get beaten out?

Maybe jailed?

Maybe my family won't like my nice guy appearence anymore?

Maybe my friends won't like my nice guy appearence anymore?


I want to show people how much they bullshit.

I get a thrill when showing people how much they bullshit themselves.

It seems like this post here is bullshit.

I feel like I am bullshiting myself. Psychedelics and molly have showed me how it's to be totally honest.

I'm only not that way normally because I fear for my separated self.

The lines above are also bullshit.

I'll have to tell people sober-faced a lot of shit I have been withholding.

I also like to think I would be a superior person doing that. I CAN TELL THE TRUTH. YOU CAN'T, YOU COWARD.

This post was posted out of pure and complete fear. Fear of what I might become if I drop this identity I'm holding onto right now.

 

I feel like I can't stay bullshiting myself any longer though. It's like an one-way 

Psychedelics showed me my total ignorance and bullshiting.

I feel like my ego is melting and this is totally frightening.

And finally, I still think all of this is bullshit and I'm just trying to avoid my fear or hear some conforting words.

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I would be mindful of desire for catharsis and releasing my unpleasant karma onto others for my own relief.

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Slow, smooth, steady. Enjoy it as it unfolds. Being you.

This moment only. Thoughts about the future are thoughts. 

If anything, notice the tendency to go into a thought story, or twelve. 

?♥️

 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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@Serotoninluv I'll also be honest about my projections.

I think I wasn't clear when writing this post. I first and foremost want to be 100% honest with MYSELF

Edited by Espaim

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Its hard to make communication while being in a non-dual state. You will likely be silent most of the time. And confuse the shit out of people.

If you mean to be more authentic to your true desires and values. Then you can actually expect people to like, love and respect you more than before. Some will of course hate you. But those people will become less and less in your world as they will just disappear. Sharing you opinions truthfully is a form of giving value in a relationship.

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4 hours ago, Espaim said:

I'm currently reading Radical Honesty. Holy shit.

Read the book and loved it. I'd just be careful how you deliver the truth, some people are not ready and not very open to it. Expect to lose some friends, expect that it'll freak them out.

It is my biggest mistake because I am very straight forward. Even people on this forum can not take it sometimes. I am making a step back now and watching actually what I am saying...

I would invite others to have a genuine conversation. If you see that the person is not ready or resilient, do not push it on or continue. Telling the truth skill requires some level of sensitivity, respect, emotional intelligence and a lot of compassion. 

But the greatest part of it is there is nothing to lose!

I see it this way: if you are being authentic (and compassionate at the same time, it is very important!) and others do not like it or not in sync with you, then the door is always open, do not look back, just move on. 

Hopefully you will be attracting those with the same vibe and there is a big potential to learn from those people. You must have a mental fortitude and be highly develop for this step. Radical honestly is not for weak people for sure, no offence. Also you have to be ready to really take responsibility for every word/action you say/make.

To find a person like this is so rear. I, maybe, met three so far. I grew so much by just interacting with them verbally. 

Good luck.

Edited by Galyna

"All that we know is limited, something we don't - is infinite"

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I knew someone who loved to say how honest they were and that they always told the truth, blah, blah. It was a lie.

They told the truth when it was convenient, but like most would lie when it wasn't. Funny they couldn't see this though, not to self-aware I guess. 

Also, I think someone can lie by omitting the truth (ie, if I'm not asked, then I just won't tell, so I'm not lying), so get that one clear for yourself. In my book its lying by omission.


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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It depends on whether you have your own business or you are an employee.

If you are an employee, you may have to choose whether to be politically correct/watch your mouth or be upfront about anything.

If you are a boss, same thing. You cannot be too harsh sometimes. 

So it's your choice.

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When I wrote this post I was maniac on stimulants. I can see now this task is harder and has more traps than it seems. Hell, I probably fucked up with some people yesterday (again because hyped up). Thank you people for your tips!

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My advice, coming from someone who has been a pathological liar most of his life, is to expect the unexpected when telling the truth. Don't expect people to lavish praise on you. And like you said, make sure you are being honest first and foremost with YOURself. I would suggest thinking for yourself as to what value telling the truth will bring you, instead of forcing yourself to now be Honest Abe in every single situation. Honestly you're not going to be able to tell the whole, unfiltered truth all the time without some serious consequences. Practically speaking. Use your mind to decide what's right for you. All that being said, the truth is usually not as scary as your mind plays it out to be. Test it out in small doses and all the more power to you!

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@Espaim  Usually the mind will think of the worst possible outcome, having to put up a fence all the time to hide your true self is draining. 
 

Once you let go of all the fake persona’s, it feels truly liberating. 

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It can feel overwhelming to change so much at once due to insight but also be mindful to steady yourself and stay conscious of your "woke" ego. That can also be dangerous for a number of observable reasons. Get your notepad ready so to speak. Good luck!

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This didn't go as expected

Many self-deception mechanisms are coming to surface and it hurts:(

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@Espaim

Can you give an example? 

Remember there's a difference between criticism and honesty. 

Don't criticize yourself or others, but being honest, unless at your job or in an unhealthy relationship, doesn't seem like it should be this challenging. 

I could be wrong but what have you told your friends/family? 


"Some people, not me, are a little concerned. Some people, not me, feel you...might be...
demonstrating a failure to show appreciation."
-Russell Bufalino

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I'd say what's most important is be honest to yourself and how you feel. Sometimes being honest isn't so clear cut. For instance I may want to eat some cheesecake and honestly express that desire but also want to put it off to benefit my fitness goals. Recognizing the complexity of it is a form of honesty. 

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On 27/05/2020 at 7:12 PM, JessiChell said:

I could be wrong but what have you told your friends/family? 

I was being over dramatic :S. I'm a little bit of a drama king usually hahaha

I have this one friend that is also into self-development. Sometimes we don't agree on some things and we have long discussions about some topics. I noticed that sometimes I try to impose my opinion on him. So, the "day I fucked up" was when out of the blue that realization come to me and I told him by audio on whatsapp what I really think. The way I told him wasn't the best because I was maniac on stimulants and I had some fucked up DMT trip the day before. I explained what happened and he didn't even listen the audio, so my fearful ass got saved. Now I think actually it would have been better in some ways if he actually listened to the audio,
 

I also went and told my dad how angry I was at him for imposing shoulds on me everyday and I spoke about my frustration of never receiving any compliments for what I do right. Then a ding happened in my head. Lol, I actually want to do some things he tells me, I was just rationalizing being a victim to not do the tasks, and my dad telling me to do triggered my victim mindset. After that he said there was no problem, he understands me.

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On 15/05/2020 at 1:09 AM, JessicaKatherine said:

stay conscious of your "woke" ego

I got conscious of my devilry on a LSD trip and now I can't identify myself anymore as spiritual or woke. There's a lot of work to do.

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