Meditation Report Journal

[Milos Uzelac]

6:10 am CEST time zone. 

? Focus breath meditation intended time 40 minutes; managed time 20 minutes; with several minutes of actual breath focusing. Report and Noticed obstacles:

1.) I have/had a recurring thought pattern attraction, during these last several days and weeks, in home quarantine with access and in search of politcal analyst prediction visual media, in visualising a fantasy about writing a post on the Society, Environment and Politics thread, bases on my thinking and assessment of deeper inner meaning* and connection of newscast on video of world politcal events and creating a thoughtful, insightful and sceintificly inffered personal prédiction about the possible headings and outcomes of larger geopolitical events (such as the future of US/China relations and warning of their current world peace, between superpowers, endangerment and predicting and sharing posts about the possible future heading of the EU and the future of membership of some of it's current member states). In order to, I assume this is the underlying motivation, to attract people to view my content, comment on it (so I get get/be in the center of attention of people I judge as higher consciousness, more developed and better than me as who's verdict on my analysis and predictions I want to hear) and to give affirmational positive feedback, to my self, in short a praise, of the sort: "You are doing the work, congratulations in your thinking it is sound and on right terms, in accordance with this spiral dynamics development of consciousness work". (an imagined image of a @Leo Guracomment saying and that of Serotoninluv in the similar manner) of my articulated and correct linguistically expressed thought content on the Society, Environment and Politics thread. I can't focus what else I wanted to write as a thought pattern distraction and attachment, will do an edit later, after a 5 hour sleep/rest session and add another, if it occurs, reccuring thought pattern obstacle observance after the mediation session of 30 minutes, that I have in plan, after I wake up at about 12:00 am CEST time zone. End of detailing of results after this described arisen reccuring thought pattern during attempted breath focus meditation of 40 minutes report at 6:20 am CEST. 

(note: I am losing/lost a bit of the original track and intention during writing this journal section and got distracted by my own sentence correction and thought patterns during writing this .) 

Edited April 18, 2020 by Milos Uzelac