intense and scary experience in meditation

[Moment]

hey guys, 

When I meditate is usually have some Kundalini symptoms going on. I have jerks and spontaneous head movements. It’s been like this for about two years and I’ve gotten used to it. Yesterday though I went deeper than what i normally. do. My body forcefully wanted to lean forward into a 45-degree position, and after sitting in that position for a while, I encountered what I can only describe as an extremely intense vibrating feeling. It felt like every cell of my body was about to explode! This was way too intense for me, so I quickly got myself out of the meditative state I was in. Now, ive had virabting feelings before, but this was something else. 

Could it be just another Kundalini symptom? It’s kind of bothers me because I don’t want Kundalini to awaken at this point in my life. 

Does anyone know what this is? I’ve been meditating for 5 years and I’ve never experienced anything close to it. 

 

 

[Pilgrimage of Self]

Very intriguing... I would like to know what that was also if anybody knows. What kind of meditation do you do? And how many mins per day? I have been doing the do nothing meditation 30 mins daily for a few years now but recently upped it to 1 hour daily total by adding another 30 min labelling meditation. I have only had 2 "weird experiences" while meditating though.. Once... I heard multiple like 5-7 different voices at the same time while meditating... which freaked me the fuck out and I stopped meditation. And the second time... which happened a few months back, was a really pleasurable kind of pressure and vibration feeling on my back and everytime i breathed in and out I had consistent goosebumps...it felt really powerful.. in a good way. 

I REALLY want "weird and/or mystical" experiences right now though.. Hell.. I'll take even scary ones haha. I really wanna have one of those "small awakenings" everybody is talking about. It doesn't matter how small it is. Hope its on the way

Edited April 13, 2020 by Pilgrimage of Self

[Moment]

these days I do mantra meditation for about 30min once or twice a day 

[Pilgrimage of Self]

@Moment Never done that type of meditation. Any good source on how to start?

[Moment]

you could for example try out some of the trancendental meditation mantras. Ive used one of them in the past, works well.

http://minet.org/www.trancenet.net/secrets/mantras.shtml

As for now I am actally using a mantra i got after initiation with an enlightened master in India : ) 

Its wierd how I actually feel that different mantras has different effect on my body-mind. Might be all in my head, who knows 

[Pilgrimage of Self]

@Moment What's that secret mantra from the master if you dont mind sharing? Would rather try it out with that

[Moment]

he gave me several. How old are you? 

Edited April 13, 2020 by Moment

[Pilgrimage of Self]

@Moment Turned 27 three days ago. Why?

[Moment]

A I N G A.  pronunciation: "aiiinga". reapeat it silently in your mind. find your own rythm and play around with it. the key is effortlessness,  this one should NOT be accompanied with hard focus like many other meditation practices. say it as silently as possible, but do not try to make it silent, thats effort. Let it calm down naturally. Do not bother focusing on your breath, just focus on the mantra. Ive had experiences where i completely lost tack of space and time with this teqnicue. It really does affect your mind different than mindfulness. Not saying its better, just different. 

Do not overdo this one tho, you can get some pretty bad headaches. I recommend no more than 30min to begin with

Edited April 13, 2020 by Moment

[Mu_]

5 hours ago, Moment said:

hey guys, 

When I meditate is usually have some Kundalini symptoms going on. I have jerks and spontaneous head movements. It’s been like this for about two years and I’ve gotten used to it. Yesterday though I went deeper than what i normally. do. My body forcefully wanted to lean forward into a 45-degree position, and after sitting in that position for a while, I encountered what I can only describe as an extremely intense vibrating feeling. It felt like every cell of my body was about to explode! This was way too intense for me, so I quickly got myself out of the meditative state I was in. Now, ive had virabting feelings before, but this was something else. 

Could it be just another Kundalini symptom? It’s kind of bothers me because I don’t want Kundalini to awaken at this point in my life. 

Does anyone know what this is? I’ve been meditating for 5 years and I’ve never experienced anything close to it. 

 

 

I can't say for certain, but it sounds like more energetic release stuff, which isn't always a needed or a useful thing.  Sounds like you responded in the right way for yourself. 

[Pilgrimage of Self]

9 hours ago, Moment said:

A I N G A.  pronunciation: "aiiinga". reapeat it silently in your mind. find your own rythm and play around with it. the key is effortlessness,  this one should NOT be accompanied with hard focus like many other meditation practices. say it as silently as possible, but do not try to make it silent, thats effort. Let it calm down naturally. Do not bother focusing on your breath, just focus on the mantra. Ive had experiences where i completely lost tack of space and time with this teqnicue. It really does affect your mind different than mindfulness. Not saying its better, just different. 

Do not overdo this one tho, you can get some pretty bad headaches. I recommend no more than 30min to begin with

Haha will do. Interested to try this one out. Thanks!

[Dumuzzi]

Yes, those symptoms are caused by the increased flow of energy and effects of increased electromagnetism in nerve clusters. Sometimes there are involuntary movements, spasms, kriyas (spontaneous yogic poses) as well as whatever effects an increased flow of energy may generate, such as heat and vibration. If you don't want to experience a Kundalini Awakening, you should probably stop meditating. If you continue, your Kundalini will eventually awaken and there will be serious side-effects, that much I can pretty much guarantee. However, if you can find an awakened Guru or Master to teach you, those effects can be lessened signficantly.

[Pilgrimage of Self]

@Dumuzzi What are those side effects? What is kundalini? Have you experienced them?

[Dumuzzi]

@Pilgrimage of Self I have had a Kundalini awakening, yes. 

Kundalini is somewhat mysterious, but it has many levels, such as the physical, energetic and spiritual as well as the divine.

On the physical level, the awakening of Kundalini results in an increased activity of the nervous system, all across the board, but particularly along the spine and eventually the brain. It is this increased activity that causes many side effects, which is often referred to as Kundalini Syndrome or in severe cases, Kundalini Psychosis. It is alleged that those that develop their Kundalini with a Guru can escape most of these side-effects, by strengthening their nervous system and their entire body through Yogic disciplines. In fact the entire system of Hatha Yoga is designed to strengthen the system so it can withstand the increased flow of this nervous energy. 

Those that awaken their Kundalini unprepared, often spontaneously, can suffer serious issues, which are very hard to treat and in some cases can even result in death. This is certainly not a force to be toyed with, so I would always advise the average person to consider their life path carefully and think about the risks they're willing to take.

In my case, I had a full Kundalini Awakening in December 2012, which was followed by several years of difficulty in all areas of life. I managed to largely overcome my issues by now, but I did receive divine help and I was saved by a (or the) Goddess at my lowest point. Let's just say that the 5-6 years after that event was pretty much a write-off in terms of living a conventional life, career, friendships, relationships, money and pretty much any other physical reward you can think of that makes life worth living for most people. The Spiritual benefits made it worthwhile but I suspect that most people absolutely wouldn't be willing to make that sacrifice and trade-off. 

[Pilgrimage of Self]

@Dumuzzi Damn.... this really sounds like serious stuff. Been meditating for a few years myself, 30 mins a day, now upped it to 1 hour per day. Really love it and wanna keep doing it. Also, very interested in mystical experiences and enlightenment. What steps would you suggest that I take so im not "caught unprepared" so to say? How common is the kundalini awakening anyway? Can you awaken it by just regular meditation even though you are not "trying to experience a kundalini awakening"?

[Dumuzzi]

@Pilgrimage of Self It really varies. 

My own experience would suggest that 2012 was some sort of trigger event and the experience has become much more common than in the past. Also, a lot more people are meditating and doing Yoga, so these practices are bound to trigger Kundalini Awakening at least in some who are pre-disposed to it. 

I myself meditated on and off for about 20 years before the breakthrough happened, practised some Yoga and Tai-Chi, but really wasn't religious about it. There was some predisposition in me towards spirituality from an early age, I was never much interested in the ordinary pastimes of my peers, such as drinking or chasing after girls. I started reading serious spiritual literature as a teenager (mostly the Hindu classics).

Certainly, regular meditation can set it off and some people who suffer from Kundalini psychosis aren't even aware what is causing their often debilitating symptoms. I'm not trying to discourage you, just be aware of the dangers. Personally, I am an advocate of Tantra, which on one level is about various techniques that aim to transmute reproductive energy (libido) into  a higher, spiritual form (Kundalini), but it is also a theistic approach and requires a certain amount of devotion to the female side of God, which is usually called Kundalini Shakti or just Shakti. In Christianity, this is referred to as Shekinah or Holy Spirit and is a very important component to connecting with the divine.

I personally think that an Atheistic approach to Kundalini and indeed, enlightenment is not a viable path, mostly because the ego tends to get in the way and giving yourself over to a higher power is an important part of the process of enlightenment. It is one thing to talk about having no ego in an abstract sense, which plenty of people do on this forum, but the real test is whether you are really, actually willing to give everything up and risk your life in service of a higher power? That is really what killing the ego means and I can guarantee that most people would absolutely not do this, for any reason whatsoever. This is almost a moot point in today's society however, since most people don't even believe that such a higher power exists, which would really be the first step in giving up their ego.

[Moment]

@Dumuzzi wow this sounds heavy. I really dont want to go down that Kundalini path. But at the same time, I dont want to give up on the benefits meditation has given me. What do you think about only meditating for like 10 minutes a day? wouldnt that be too little to awaken Kundalini? 

[SamueLSD]

16 hours ago, Moment said:

so I quickly got myself out of the meditative state I was in.

 

You stopped a good thing!

Understandable though, the opportunity will reveal itself again 

[Dumuzzi]

@Moment Personally, I would pursue it, despite the risks, but that's just me. All I'm saying is that there are consequences to following a spiritual path, it is not easy or without sacrifice, but there is an inner compulsion in everyone to follow it. In this respect, it is much like the sex drive and in fact the spiritual urge and the reproductive drive are at their roots essentially the same thing. Me telling you not to meditate, would be like me telling you not to have sex. At some point, you are bound to lapse...

What I would suggest is to let your inner Goddess guide you. Shakti is intelligent energy and will not give you more than you can handle. Let her be your guide and follow her suggestions. This will come to you intuitively.

[Moment]

@Dumuzzi what you say about inner compulsion to follow it is very true. I been aware of that impulse within myself for a while. Its such a wierd thing. Anyways I have read a lot about the downsides to Kundalini awakening, but people never mention what benefits they have gotten form it? Sometimes i get the feeling that Kundalini really doesnt benefit people in any way, except maybe increased energy. But that people are just forced to accept their situation, and therefore it is much easier for the psyche to considered it a positive thing. And that since it is such a mysterious and "spiritual" phenomenon, it must be something valuable and good. Correct me if I am wrong

 

In what way has Kundalini awakening been worth it to you? Do you have any real tangible benefits that you can point at ? 

Edited April 14, 2020 by Moment