PostVipassana Insights

[Inga]

Well I am a week after Self Vipassana course at home - perfect timing with quarantine. 

I visited my privet Hell only to discover that this is my paradise playing disguise games with me. 

Vipassana is a genius Technic I am in love with it. The biggest present I could give to myself and the biggest challenge as well - perfect paradox.

It felt as mini-dose of Ayawaska every day hahahaha

So yes I felt instant release and great deepens awareness on how I am pure Nothingness!

How the biggest Give to myself as for "others" as well is to just listen. 

I felt how the voice just talking to itself and the thoughts just think themselves and the same the feelings feel themselves.

I release all the urgency to explain something to someone - because It's impossible to explain what I want to - it's something which may be understood only through direct experience.

I can only give my listening and my receiving.

I can only be and this I manifesting all which me only observing.

It's so simple that is very complicating hahahahha

The snake which eat it's own tail.

I wondered many times during the infinite meditation about how can it be that Leo didn't talk about that? can it be he didn't try Vipassana?

So yes now I'm continuing to give a full try to this technic - at least a few years. 

I do though do mini-douse of psilocybe in addition to meditation.

Now I am fully out of the closed that I am going Buddha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All what was almost now it's clear and whole - all what was in control now is a surprise every breath.

I have no expectation to be understood or liked or be a good person or to be a person at all hahahahha

As I'm awakening in the morning now the first thing I'm becoming aware is my breath! It's AMAZING!

I AM BREATHING EVERY MORNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG

The next thing I'm becoming aware is thoughts - such a surreal experience! I got a Netflix - fully privet one. Oh and the great thing that It's not by force and not me - my thoughts are just literately movies which the mind as an antenna broadcasting them. I am free to be identified or just to watch them as they are - arousing and passing.

Meditation at least two hours - I'm doing 3/4 hours - quarantine so I have a looooooot of time.

Well the biggest change which made me have no doubts in adopting this Technic is the infinity of unconditional Love I feel and energy to give all of me to my family and people in need - purpose to do whatever I can to help everyone to be liberated from suffering! 

My ego now is including All Beings !!!!

I have energy so much energy to listen to everyone and smile and see positivity in everything 

There is no bad or good anymore - there is just IS.

I am free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am free to free myself to give and receive to help - really help all the "other's" myself's.  

There is no questions anymore and expectation to superpowers and miracles - every Breath is the Miracle!

I am surprised every day and cannot believe the wonder of being.

My family and friends not recognizing me and in the same breath feel so free and natural in my presence and it's funny because I am they presence of they'r myself  

I am sane finally - so funny to experience the sensation of remembering.

I am such an interesting content hahahahahah

The reality is AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I know This Too Shall Pass

Well that's it for now  

  

 

 

 

[Applegarden]

Welcome to the forum! Very happy to hear you expressing happiness!

[allislove]

Welcome to the forum. Leo tried Vipassana and a lot of people in this forum including me  

Happy, that this technique works for you. So many positive words - keep going, it is miracle   

[Inga]

Thank you  

Yes I was almost sure he did - just didn't find some video about that.

I was looking for every information about this Technic before deciding to do that.

I am happy as well that is working  

 

 

[Inga]

It's such a challenging work

The ego is so strong and persistent

The mind running wildly taking no rest

Asking questions in loops with no interest in answers

Just more shadow or illusion of tomorrow or yesterday 

So much pain to break in to the now moment

To peel suffering from this fossil self

Everything arousing and passing to a vertigo in my head

Sensations are so sticky and feels real

It's so tempting to identify myself with this mine and I

Oh this addiction is older then the times  

The suffering are almost sweeter then the freedom

The freedom feels like an illusion itself

And again the wheel is rotating in asking

Don't attach to it 

It's only a breath from being the past of this now exhalation

What is real what is real what is real

No nothing 

What is nothing what is everything

So bitter sweet to wallow in this state

Go seat and Meditate

This to shall pass

This to shall pass

No need to remember

No need to liberate 

It is what it Is

Just accept 

Inhale ... Exhale ... Inhale ... Exhale...

Just seat Love 

Just Listen

Just Observe 

 

Edited April 6, 2020 by Inga

[allislove]

I was expecting only positive words from you (based on the first message lol)

Quote

It's such a challenging work

Are you sure?? Maybe, the work is easy-going  

[Inga]

But it is positive  

all truth is positive   now I am already dancing hahahahaha

How was for you by the way the Vipassana? do you still following this path?

 

 

[Inga]

I feel so much Love

Love with this Compassion flavor

Life is so curious

One moment I am under the water

Allowing it to wash me of myself

Just trusting and let the flow flow

All is good all is temporarily 

Then comes the moment of flying under the sun

The wind whispers gently on my body

I can smell the flowers 

As a butterfly every breath is an admire 

Such a wonderful imagination 

Just siting 

Writing 

I love my home, infinite gratitude for being

Such a Great Illusion is to be me  

 

[allislove]

21 minutes ago, Inga said:

But it is positive  

all truth is positive   now I am already dancing hahahahaha

How was for you by the way the Vipassana? do you still following this path?

Agreed, it is positive, my projection of it wasn't..  

Life is dance of Love, dancing is amazing hehe

I liked my 10-days Vipassana retreat, I couldn't stick to the practices back at home. Now I prefer a little of "deep breathing/do nothing" meditation in the morning, psychedelics and listening to Abraham Hicks  

Have a good day

[Inga]

I like Abraham Hicks

I LOVE psychedelics - they are my main tool more then 10 years in different constellations   

And yep it's really challenging to stick to THIS practice, this is why I write it " it's such a challenging work" it was before putting myself to do the meditation hahahah 

and it helped me  

Well it's evening here in Greece   Thank you  

HAVE A GREAT DAY DEAR  

[allislove]

Sending you ❤️ from Germany ?

[Inga]

I have so much compassion 

It's delighting me that all the thoughts are about - giving

How to give more and more 

Everything I understand and see

All is Love 

I see the pain and understand 

We are addicted to it

I see the people wanting to do good - but such in unaware way

I feel the need in liberation

I feel the world so alive

I feel this I of mine and this feeling - mine

I care so much that all I have to do is - give

Liberate myself and be aware to Serve in the best way

I do remember my attachment to my suffering

I do remember then I was a black hole

 Now it's just Love and compassion and infinite patience

There is no Inga really - just God's tool

Oh my dear world I Love You

You are Love You are!

Ah my dear Humanity you are Amazing as you are

Please just accept your beauty as you are right now

If I could hug you all!

Now come back to yourself and breath and just release

God knows better how to use me right to - GIVE

I am such an amazing tool of Love and still just learning

How great are this passing sensation and the capacity of Love

I Thank you so much 

I Love you so much

Please help me to be awake and humble 

Please help me to be pure giving 

Please help me to touch the hearts and in simple way to be that Love - Unconditionally. 

 

[Inga]

In the heart of this storm of I's

Sitting in equanimity washed

Observing their infinite wild dance

They calling persistently and showing themselves

"Look" one of The I scream's "I'm so Beautiful"

"Oh look here I'm so Smart!"

"No look" another I cries "I'm so Nice"

"Oh no I'm so Modest look here" The I whispers

Their fight on attention and identification is it forever?

Sitting in silence observing

God is Infinite

Such a genius and sharp game

We are in this kindergartens of I's 

Sometimes feels like inferno

Oh yes this understanding poring love 

The Paradise is also here

Exactly here in this one Breath

Let the hurricane swirl around

Looking how the stage is full of fools

This army of I's 

Sitting in the eye of this storm 

Inside is all the beginnings

Well there is no outside as you cannot feel the inside

There is no Truth in only understanding it's I's reign 

Just breath 

The Truth is to experience 

It Is

Just breath 

Can you Be?

Edited April 13, 2020 by Inga

[Inga]

well good morning

all it's perfect

we are the mind

we don't have it

we are it

hahahahahhahahahahahah

i can't stop laughing

so simple

this is the trip!

good morning

good night

we are the mind

and all it is

just is

such a simple dream

so simple that it's infinite

hahahahahhahahahaha

nothing it's so blessed everything

the music is a bless

there is nothing to do 

or even to be

there is no we

for sure no I

at least not as I was identified

there is only a blessed nothing

this is the trip!

hahahahahahhahahahaha

good morning life 

there is no  i or mine or we or you

this is the mind

it is

bless

[Inga]

Love

Infinite Dream Of Love In Love 

Mind Is Love Then

All It Is - Is Love

Love is All

All is Love

My I is Love

My and I is Love

Simple

Infinite Love and Beauty

So Biased on this Dream

Awakening Is Destruction 

Destruction Is Birth - Into Love

Strange Loop for Understanding

Love To Be

You're One with I 

I'm Oneness 

Death for Love 

Love to Live 

The Universe Is Love

 I am Love

Love is God 

All is One

 

[Inga]

Hi God

Good Morning

Thank You

I'm Sorry

Please Forgive me

I Love You

Thank You

I Love

Gratitude 

Infinite

I am You

You are I

Love

You'r opening You'r eyes Inside

Into the Infinite

All is Love

I am Love

Love is All

Love Is God

God Is All It Is

Love Is All

I Love You

I Am You

[Raptorsin7]

@Inga Which vipassana course did you do?