wk197

Does leaving your comfort zone guarantee growth?

17 posts in this topic

I remember a video Leo made titled ''One simple rule to acing life'' and he said you should always do what uncomfortable. perhaps I should rewatch it because I don't remember most of the details but i'm thinking right now that it doesn't seem entirely realistic that leaving my comfort zone will give me personal growth, like when people say that hard work doesn't guarantee success

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Yes, because then your comfort zone expands. The more comfortable you are in different areas, the less resistance you face. Thing is someone doing 'hard work' might just be doing the same thing over and over, not willing to step out of their comfort zone, not willing to explore new methods of getting to success. Of course if you have found something that grows you in the way you want then yeah work hard at it, but in order to find the thing that grows one the most one must step out of their comfort zone and explore. Everyone grows the best in different ways. 


The how is what you build, the why is in your heart. 

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Rather than doing whatever is uncomfortable, I would ask if engaging in something uncomfortable will lead to growth and expansion - and then trust my intuition.

For example, last year I was hiking up to the top of "Devil's Bridge" in Sedona, AZ. Towards the top, things got precarious. I was right on the edge of cliffs that had drops of hundreds of meters. I have an intense fear of high cliffs and my mind and body went into fight or flight. My body was pumped with stress hormones and I started to experience vertigo and was losing my balance - my mind and body went into a panic. I asked myself "would continuing this hike lead to growth and expansion?". Perhaps facing this fear of heights could expand myself and overcome the fear. Yet the feeling was an emphatic "NO!! Do not do this. Turn around now". There was a sense that if I didn't turn around, I might actually jump off the cliff to make the extremely intense panic stop. That's how intense it was. I decided to turn around - and I'm grateful I did.

Yet other contexts are different. Last year I did some EMDR therapy and the psychologist brought me back into some earlier traumatic episodes of my life I had with my father. This also triggered my fight or flight. I became filled with stress hormones and wanted to run away. I again asked my self "Would continuing this lead to growth and expansion?". In this case, the answer was "Yes" and I intuitively knew to continue - even though it was uncomfortable. Yet the psychologist and I agreed that it was good to enter an uncomfortable "stretch zone", yet not enter a "panic zone" that could re-traumatize me. 

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Yea it does. I still go to university, and picked really 'difficult' modules and dissertation because I get more out of it. I've have learned so much from university despite me breaking down about how hard everything is xD

Once you try something difficult for you, you literally get stronger. I use to be scared as fuck to even book an appointment for the doctors, but now I make conversations with the reception.

All uncomfortable things will eventually make you comfortable. Just have to keep doing it


You're not human, you're the universe

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20 minutes ago, B_Naz said:

Once you try something difficult for you, you literally get stronger. I use to be scared as fuck to even book an appointment for the doctors, but now I make conversations with the reception.

 

What if I still feel consistently bad emotionally after trying to leave the comfort zone? 

Edited by wk197

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@wk197 I would tell myself

 "What if I actually did that..." "What are the opportunities it would open for me"

Basically what previously has been said. Imagine the expansion and and growth you can get if you just did that one thing

BUT most of the time I give up though lol. However, I only give up at that time. I take a break, prepare and try again. Never truly gave up


You're not human, you're the universe

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1 hour ago, wk197 said:

What if I still feel consistently bad emotionally after trying to leave the comfort zone? 

This is where mindfulness practice is very useful, being able to feel the emotions without them looping back into themselves. Notice you probably feel bad about feeling bad, creating a loop. Mindfullness helps the mind just directly expirence the feeling/ thoughts and allow them to be. This will allow your comfort zone to expand faster, and allow you to relax as you push yourself more into the uncomfortable. 

Edited by OctagonOctopus

The how is what you build, the why is in your heart. 

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Expansion of your comfort zone guarantees improved confidence and reduced fear at the very least.


hrhrhtewgfegege

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I dunno...  I think I tried the "Simple Rule for Acing Life" and may have gone overboard causing me to regress and "tighten"/"constrict" more ... ego backlash... gotta watch out for that.

A yoga teacher once said that they try to go fro about 70% of your stretching ability  and you can take that in any aspect of life...

Go too soft and nothing happens 

Go too hard and you cause further damage...

I've noticed in my life it's sometimes harder to just chill and relax too though :) 


"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"   --   Marry Poppins

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@Serotoninluv Thats a very insightful way to put it. Vertigo is nuts


“The eye through which I see God is the same eye through which God sees me; my eye and God's eye are one eye, one seeing, one knowing, one love.”  ~ Meister Eckhart

 

 

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Great changes happen when one is uncomfortable. The character always has a chance to develop when facing the unknown. Maybe by tasting success and overcoming a new challenge, or by having to rediscover the self when failing miserably. 
 

Staying comfortable is like a caveman hiding in his cave, ordering Pizza and checking the ‘leave at door’ box. ?❤️ 


Is all that we see or seem

But a dream within a dream?

- Edgar Allen Poe 

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Outside of your comfort zone is the place to expand. Inside of your comfort zone is the place to heal.

Demonizing and vilifying comfort is not constructive.


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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8 hours ago, Commodent said:

Outside of your comfort zone is the place to expand. Inside of your comfort zone is the place to heal.

Demonizing and vilifying comfort is not constructive.

I never heard it worded like this but it rings true for me thank you


Sailing on the ceiling 

 

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It's too beneficial to go out of your comfort zone but sometimes it can lead things to become too dangerous for example if you are afraid of heights and you go bungee jumping in order to overcome your fear, you might get a heart attack or something if you go over your limits and not appreciate your FEAR (fear is not always wise to overcome-it protects you) anyways I gave an example to actually explain myself Idk if I chose the proper one.

Or for example you might think that getting out of your comfort zone translates into letting know the person that you like you like them lol - just In case you do- sometimes expressing your feeling when not ready - is not always wise. 

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I really get good results sometimes when I go beyond my comfortzone. Even now by writing this comment I am moving beyond my comfortzone since I am even anxious about sharing sth puplic and fear of not doing well, not expressing well, not good english etc.  What l struggle with a lot is not mostly the outer danger. When I decide to try something new or behave in a different way I struggle with confision a lot. Lots of scnerios in my mind? What is my motive? that is the main question mostly. Sometimes the fear of rejection take it is place, sometimes fear judgment, I fear my own judgments tword myself and other, try to find the ''best''  ''fittest'' ''  most honest''  etc. answers, behaviors.  I don't know it guarantee growth but I think comfortzone is not only external also there is lots of internal comfortzones and they both effect eachother. In my experinces when I am in a comfort inside it is not making huge difference external changes. 

 

 

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