It's been a month now after my first Ayahuasca experience. Have some questions to Leo

[Rayster]

Hi everyone! I'm new to the forum, but I've been a lurker since I'm waiting for my registration now here I am!

It's been a month after my first Ayahuasca experience. This is actually my first psychedelics. My trip has been so intense as I was able to communicate to Mother Aya that fast after a couple of tears. Then after a few days, Leo's new video titled 'How Psychedelics Work - Making Sense Of Psychedelics' got released. Talking about perfect timing, he discussed everything what I experience especially this part "When a pure person takes a psychedelic it's a completely different experience. The determining factor with psychedelics is not the substance itself that you take, or even the dose. It's your internal purity. How pure is your mind, how pure is your heart, how much shadow material do you have, that really determines how your trip is gonna go. The pure you are in heart and mind and soul and spirit. The more selfless you are, the more work you done to yourself, the more mature you are, the more developed you are, the more open-minded you are, the more fearless you are, the more curious you are, the deeper you contemplate, the better your trips will go, and the more insights you'll gather"

I got so much insights from my journey, it's a liberating experience. The next day, we discuss with other members.. and Im quite happy that I was able to help others since they share to me that they saw me in their journey as a light shining their way thru their dark experiences. Though after from all of it, I realize others look it as a 'trip' and wanting to have more experiences soon...

I understand we have different individual experiences, but from what I understand they need the plant to heal themselves? or is it not considered as escapism? I also asked myself multiple times if I should join them, but the answer is still no. I mean, the experience has been great because I got to know myself better and what I need to do. I think there's a kid around 20 years old that join the ceremony. He has this 'angsty teenager vibe', they have a little group that it felt like its their own circle. I dont know tbh, maybe Im just jealous they have a group. It felt like Im too special to vibe with the people in my group at that time..

It felt like they're the 'superior people' because they have more than 1 psychedelics experience like mushrooms and I dont have much. It felt like they want the medicine to heal them.. I dont know, it felt like they didnt get what the message from the medicine is, or Im just making this things up.

 

 

 

Edited March 7, 2020 by Rayster

[remember]

@Rayster first things first - it’s difficult to get leo’s reply on that, as he will be not around, pursuing his own healing for 30 to 90 days - means up to three months. 

for my part i would tell you, you are encountering two to three phenomenons here. one is projection and one is pear group pressure and the third is some kind of addiction/codependency to the spiritual vehicle - which in your case you already encountered in yourself. the ability to encounter it in yourself makes you a guide for others while others seem to encounter it in you as they can’t find it yet in themselves - what will ultimately guide some of them towards an odissey wanting to see deeper and deeper into it - although there is no deeper than the truth. if you feel good with the experience for now, no you should not join them, there is so much more to experience - if you want to refresh the experience after a longer time, do it. i always felt it somehow takes away the magic if some special experiences are made an everyday event. by keeping it a special holy and magical experience you preserve its cultural and magical inheritance along with it. you are strong enough to walk your own path.

Edited March 7, 2020 by remember

[Rayster]

Thanks @remember! I just got off from the gym and since 1 month Ive been so active with my lifestyle. The medicine reminded me of what I needed to do and everything is just crystal clear. But you know, you are right. 2 people beside me during the ceremony gave me insights I was not expecting. They shared that they didnt have that good trip like what I was having, hence they told me how I was able to helped them, and I didnt do anything. It was the first time someone thank me that I dont have to do anything, just being in my presence. I've been through alot during my awakenings few years back so alot of self-inquiry, solo travels, meditation and such that helped what shaped me today.

I'm a day late for Leo then, but hoping for his recovery! I have yet to watch his new video, I will watch it later.

Can you elaborate more about Projections? I know we project our beliefs, it's natural.

My life challenges has always been peer pressure. I need to follow my intuition first and foremost..