From Boy To Beast

[dude]

Houses

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min)
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (45)
• 7 o'clock dayz

Woke up late, hmmmmmm shit. Searched for a house in the city with a friend. And went to a work bbq.

- Self-Awareness is the key

[dude]

Houses

Habit Streak (2):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS 
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (46)
• 7 o'clock dayz

Switch your focus to the things you want to achieve and your brain will solve the problem. Solutions will come up, but be aware don't get distracted.

 

- Self-Awareness is the key

Edited November 13, 2016 by dude
Media

[Venus]

When I read through, I feel like you manage to get up off your ass and do the stuff you know needs doing much more easily than I find it to do. What is it, you find, keeps you moving forward, instead of sitting back and relaxing… if you're aware of it?

[dude]

@Venus Hey, love your kind words bro! Honestly I have periods where it all goes to plan and everything falls into place and moments where I get distracted like today. All day work and then chilling with friends eating shit food.

I find that in the periods where I actually do shit I have a clear vision of what I want. Like I want this business so bad look what it could do for me! And I'm afraid of what will happen if I just do nothing and relax, I feel a sense of emergency in my head it goes like this: "Micheal, if you don't do this you won't have enough money later, or you will have a shit job and fucking hate your life for not doing the work. The time is now otherwise it won't fucking happen, DO IT."

[dude]

Longboard Guide

Habit Streak (3):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS, Alright not great
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (47)
• 7 o'clock dayz - fuck yhea we did

New period of school begins, it's about web development need to know HTML, CSS, C#, Databases and Scrum all those good things.

Worked on my main value giving post I need to complete for my longboard website. Found a great rescource for a new blogger of anyone who's interested. http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/podcasts/master-content-marketing-neil-patel/ There gold advice in there just use it.

Here is my new post on how to make a professional longboard. I think it came out great now its just the marketing for that part I need to do.

- Self-Awareness is the key

[dude]

Meditations

I see a lot of people on this website meditate a lot and I know I need to do that too but I just first have to get out of my orange haze. I'm always thinking about things I want like money and women. I need to get it and move on as fast as possible. I need to get to a peaceful place where I can just accept myself.

I went out into nature to meditate this morning:

Did a 40 minute SDS with the do nothing method like always. It was peaceful but it is funny how we don't have any real nature left in Holland. While sitting here I heard the light buzz from the highway and realized that the life beyond this park is just moving on wrapped up in the things it has to do. I want to do this more, being in nature. But I feel like I'm not in the right place to do it. When I was sitting here there were people with dogs walking past all the time and every time I though if I would have walked there and I saw this young guy sitting completely still on a bench I would judge him as a fool as a weird man. I realize that I still have a lot of judgement and that I care way too much. I should just accept myself and realize that meditating in a park is the thing that makes me interesting. It is the thing that makes me special. Now that I'm typing this I realize that this is all bullshit concepts labeling things but fuck it I'm still wrapped up in status and shit.

Edited November 15, 2016 by dude
spelling

[dude]

Judgement

Habit Streak (4):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS, 40 minutes really good
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (48)
• 7 o'clock dayz

Woke up and looked into google analytics and ad-words. Went to the park you see above, and meditated 40 min. To school for some classes. And then I got to climb again, was very frustrated because I could't accomplish the climb that I wanted to accomplish and focused on enjoying the process.

- Self-Awareness is the key

[Venus]

@dude so do you feel like you often scare yourself into doing things? Like are you telling yourself "look at this bad stuff that will happen if you don't", because i know that can be much easier. But or is it much more peaceful than that? ….or maybe a mix?

[Venus]

12 hours ago, dude said:

I should just accept myself and realize that meditating in a park is the thing that makes me interesting. It is the thing that makes me special. Now that I'm typing this I realize that this is all bullshit concepts labeling things but fuck it I'm still wrapped up in status and shit.

Remember, self love should be unconditional. Love every single bit without need for justifying. 
It doesn't matter if you meditate or not.
You are worthy of your love no matter what.
You are worthy of the love the universe throws out all the time. There is nothing you can do to not be allowed it.

There's endless love and acceptance there for you to just reach out and grab. All you have to do is reach out and grab.
… you and me both.

[dude]

@Venus

18 hours ago, Venus said:

@dude so do you feel like you often scare yourself into doing things? Like are you telling yourself "look at this bad stuff that will happen if you don't", because i know that can be much easier. But or is it much more peaceful than that? ….or maybe a mix?

It's a mix of both. For example I decided that I'm going to make a website to try to earn money. Now I thought about how it's going to effect me in good ways and in the bad ways. I do the subconscious programming everyday that I contemplate the good and bad things that will happen. Now when I decide to do something tomorrow or today I will do it. Sometime when I procrastinate I punish myself  by still doing it late at night. So I punish myself for not doing. In end it comes down to habits and making time every day to do the things you know you need to do.

Quote

Remember, self love should be unconditional. Love every single bit without need for justifying. 
It doesn't matter if you meditate or not.
You are worthy of your love no matter what.
You are worthy of the love the universe throws out all the time. There is nothing you can do to not be allowed it.

There's endless love and acceptance there for you to just reach out and grab. All you have to do is reach out and grab.
… you and me both.

Thanks for the reminder! I know I should do it but it's just hard to do it. I can say it but it is still hard to do it.

Edited November 16, 2016 by dude
another part

[dude]

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (49)
• 7 o'clock dayz - Fuck Me

I don't have a big habit streak but my LP streak is mad good. Did a lot today again. Setup adwords now it's time for the experiments. 

- Self-Awareness is the key

[dude]

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (50)
• 7 o'clock dayz - Fuck Me

Adwords and school. I need to make money online. Fuck I NEED TO! It's not looking good right now but I need to keep experimenting.

- Self-Awareness is the key

[Venus]

On 16 November 2016 at 6:36 PM, dude said:

I know I should do it but it's just hard to do it. I can say it but it is still hard to do it.

Like I said, you and me both.  

[dude]

It was at this moment the dude realized, ...He fucked up.

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min) - Fuck me
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (50)
• 7 o'clock dayz - Fuck Me

There once was a time where I was motivated. Now I'm not, better get my ass in first gear when I wake up tomorrow. Had a big party two days ago, drank way too much. Barfed the next day couldn't do anything that day sick as fuck. Why did I do that? A so called subconscious rampage lol.

- Self-Awareness is the key

[dude]

Two Gold Nuggets

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min) - 2 times 30 min
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (51)
• 7 o'clock dayz

Feeling better than yesterday, I found myself a bit back today. Two major things I need to talk about. Tomorrow I will wake up at 8 so I get better sleep it is already late now.

Yesterday I couldn't sleep all night, probably because I fucked u p my sleeping pattern in the weekend. At first I was worrying about things I know that were nothing to worry about. So I decided to read Happiness By Design by Paul Dolan at like 12 in the evening. Then I tried to sleep but couldn't again. Then I meditated for a while don't know how long exactly but at least 15 minutes. I tried to sleep and couldn't again, so now its 2 o'clock in the morning. Then I got onto a crazy train of thought. I was thinking about: why do I do personal-development? I realized I was slowly introduced to it and I thought I always watched it with some awareness but then I realized I wasn't. I realized that I was sort of binge-watching self-help content and that if I would have watched it with full awareness I would probably adjusted my life. I realized how much asleep I was otherwise I couldn't have lived my life like I was living it, with a lot of self-sabotaging habits. This tripped me out so I dug deeper. I asked again: Why do I do personal-development? I realized that I'm doing it because I want to change my life. I asked why do I want to change my life? Because I'm not happy with where I'm at. Why didn't you change your life then? At this moment I saw how much asleep I really was how fucking much. Then I formed a picture in my mind of what I was striving for and I felt such motivation such a strong drive to do something that I couldn't sleep. The picture became clearer and clearer and then eventually I fell asleep. I woke up at baseline level again, I'm trying to get my vision back I lost a bit of it.

The second thing is the video under this post. The times where I felt happy and I was floating through life were the times that I thought: "You just have to share." Now I see this concept before my eyes and I recognize how true this is! (yes the second point is smaller )

- Self-Awareness is the key

 

Edited November 22, 2016 by dude
underline

[dude]

The Game

Habit Streak (1):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (52)
• 7 o'clock dayz - Need to practice my routine again

Meditated, went to Amsterdam to game with my friend. 5 Approaches, gotto say it's nerve wrecking every time. Need to practice consistency but can't until I live in a big city. So fuck game for now, I'm focusing on online money to move. Did some research and made some changes to my website.

[dude]

Life Purpose, Burning The Boats?

Habit Streak (2):

• Meditation (30 min) - SDS
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (53)
• 7 o'clock dayz - GREEN

Wasted a lot of time but got everything green yay! Watched two episodes of Shameless and a lot of bullshit YT. Interviews with rappers and shit.

Got the idea of watching the life purpose course again because I realized I did not fully implemented and "went into the woods". I'm more like standing before the woods going in 10 steps and wondering if I didn't begin the path in a wrong part of the woods lol. aka dabble dabble shit. 

I know my life purpose and feel a drive but also resistance, need to slowly dissolve that.

- Consciousness is the key

[dude]

Documentary's

Habit Streak (2):

• Meditation (30 min) - 20 min
• Programming Subconscious - Streak (54)
• 7 o'clock dayz - RED

Love documentary's went with my dad to the International Documentary Film Festival Amsterdam. Seen some great and weird silent movies and two documentary about zero days (hackers) and South Africa (connecting to my roots).

- Consciousness is the key

[Venus]

What exactly do you mean when you say "programming subconscious"?

[dude]

@Venus First I sit down for 5 min and repeat my life-purpose to myself and then I sit down another 5 min to contemplate my life-purpose. And with contemplation I mean, asking how I'm going to realize my LP, what the effects will be on my life when I realize my LP, why I do my LP.

I got it from the Life-Purpose course of Leo. He says that you have to do this 90 days in a row than you will become a boss so that is my goal.