Confidence vs. Openness dilemma

[gar-4-field]

Recently I found that I am not really confident in what I believe in and I am very open to every new idea that is coming from my family, friends etc. I somehow have the feeling that knowing your beliefs are true and considering new ideas and possibilities as true, kind of contradict each other and that it is like this: more openness & less confidence; less openness & more confidence 

Is it possible to be really confident in what you believe in and also be very open at the same time?

 

Leo says to not be ignorant, but it seems like he would never doubt a single word of what he is saying, very very confusing, dont understand this dilemma at all

I feel like i am not really confident, is it a bad decision to close my mind off and just believe in myself more because i want to become an "alpha" (really important stage in my development i guess) ?

 

I hope you got what i meant, thx for replies

Edited March 2, 2020 by gar-4-field

[BETGR164128]

@gar-4-field @gar-4-field Go spend time with people who think they know all there is to know about life and then observe how you feel around them 

[Gili Trawangan]

It's about understanding relativity. You can understand that every single belief is just that, a belief. It doesn't mean that you have to take on others' beliefs instead, all you need is awareness that they are beliefs. Once this awareness is well established, you will be confident in the moment. Grounded in the groundlessness, so to speak. You hear points of view while understanding that that's what they are, relative points of view. There's no need to defend a position unless you want to, in the moment. There is only Now, stories of being confident or open minded can be let go of, moment to moment.

[ThinAir]

seperate your confidence from your belifs, they are just concepts. play with them, take them lightly

be confident in what you feel. know what you feel. know what you experience. there is noone who can tell you, you do not experience what you experience. be honest with yourself about what you experience. whatever it is, it's ok. If there is happiness, let happines be, if there is doupt, let doupt be, if there is desire, let desire be.

Ultimately, it's just reality happening. everything is allowed. No denial. Acceptance is the way.

[remember]

there is no problem with being confident in yourself or what you can do and being open at the same time, because if you stay open you can somehow react and also handle difficulties which come your direction. sometimes confidence is about handling every situation somehow, although if you have visions and dreams there will be times when it’s difficult to stay open because your confidence is connected to values and to hope, and hope is a really beautiful plant if you grow it, although it’s in some cases a fragile one, because it’s connected to expectations in a certain direction and can be easily disappointed. 

also there are beliefs which contradict each other in their values so massively that the belief of some people can be a threat to your survival - it’s not always just your egos survival, it can happen that the ego of someone else is threatening your survival without you giving that person a reason to do so - it’s just that the other persons ego is in survival mode so much that it will do everything to destroy your confidence so it can survive without wanting to even see your perspective.

when you stay open you will hit a point where you realize what you really can’t stand and you will also find principles for your life which you don’t want to break and which you are confident about. there are some basic human principles which feel true to get confident about and less open to discuss. that’s also ok. confidence also sometimes needs some assurance, assurance should not be manipulation in the classical sense - don’t just change your values without dubble checking what is true for you. it’s ok to have a thin confidence shield just don’t make it an undefeatable one, because that would be one of ignorance.

[Artaemis]

You gain sensitivity on the path. All of this is answered further along the path. I wouldn't try to close my mind to gain false confidence. 

Although practicing 'assertiveness' a masculine trait can be helpful in integrating the masculine. Just always check yourself and be willing to shift positions and look 'bad' if need be lest your progress takes a hit. 

Edited March 4, 2020 by Artaemis

[Artaemis]

You may need to go through a phase where you are all the things you are not supposed to be (especially within the spiritual community). Sometimes on the enlightenment path being openminded IS being willingly closed-minded and ignorant and arrogant. Those qualities will lessen though as they are integrated, they will lose their attraction power. Unconditional love sets up the terrain for integration and self-expression. 

Edited March 4, 2020 by Artaemis