How to be authentic?

[Shiva99]

I've noticed that i'm forcing and manipulating myself into doing stuff that i deep down don't really want to do.

E.g. I'm still looking for a profession and getting a diploma that will earn me a lot of money and status, instead of choosing something that i'm interested in by nature. I feel like i might get into college/university because i wanna be perceived by people as someone smart, and not because of genuine interest. 

I'm also exercising when i don't really like it. Sure it is healthy, and it gives me more energy, but i always have to force myself into it. In the end the good effects don't add up with the bad. It's like i have to drag forward a lazy dog all the time. I'm not sure if this is what being authentic means, and that it's worth all the fuzz, especially not from the perspective of life being short.

Why would i force myself into doing stuff i don't want/like? Even if it might be healthier for my body.

My ego is a smartass, and keeps finding his ways...

[Bill W]

Well this post seems authentic. So that's a good start. 

Doing things you don't want to do doesn't necessarily make you not authentic. And doing things you want to do doesn't necessarily make you authentic. 

What helps me at times like this is to have a think about what values and/or spiritual principles you want to associate yourself with and then identify behaviours and habits that can reinforce these values and principles. And it won't necessarily come naturally. 

I believe personal values have to be exercised and practiced to become real. Not just agreed from a conceptual framework.

There is a spectrum of authenticity ranging from 100% real to 100% fake. 

[Robert Leavitt]

@Shiva99 I agree with @Bill W here.  The post is authentic.  The fact that you are honest with yourself about these things it's very important.  It's not really my place to say one way or another what decision you would make, but Bill is right.  Just because you don't want to do something, doesn't mean you aren't "authentic" by any means.

There are about a million things I would prefer not to do in the course of my day.  But I understand in the depth of my soul today that if I REALLY want something,  I have to do what's necessary to obtain it. If I don't have it, it's because I haven't done the things necessary to obtain it.

So the question is, what do you REALLY want? Then look at the first thought you have about that question, and realize that it's probably a lie, and dig deeper...and be really honest with yourself about what you really want, and who you really are...

You are on the right path!

 

[Shiva99]

4 hours ago, Robert Leavitt said:

 

There are about a million things I would prefer not to do in the course of my day.  But I understand in the depth of my soul today that if I REALLY want something,  I have to do what's necessary to obtain it. If I don't have it, it's because I haven't done the things necessary to obtain it.

So how could that be authentic? I feel if something is meant to be for you, it will come naturally and the drive or whatever comes with it. 

[Parththakkar12]

 

[Shiva99]

4 hours ago, Robert Leavitt said:

 

So the question is, what do you REALLY want?

I don't know what i want. It changes everyday. Today i might wanna become a police officer, and tomorrow i want to be a Psychologist or work as a lawyer. Today i want a big family and tomorrow i want to be independent and alone. This is what keeps me stuck, but i can't stick with something. I get a lot of second doubts and become bored very quickly if i start pursuing something.

[Shiva99]

1 minute ago, Parththakkar12 said:

 

I saw this video already. It doesn't help me.

[Parththakkar12]

I'd suggest you watch more of her videos. She has an authenticity movement!

[Robert Leavitt]

3 hours ago, Shiva99 said:

So how could that be authentic? I feel if something is meant to be for you, it will come naturally and the drive or whatever comes with it. 

Look at your current life.. Exactly now in this moment.  That's what comes "easily" to you.

 

3 hours ago, Shiva99 said:

don't know what i want. It changes everyday. Today i might wanna become a police officer, and tomorrow i want to be a Psychologist or work as a lawyer. Today i want a big family and tomorrow i want to be independent and alone. This is what keeps me stuck, but i can't stick with something. I get a lot of second doubts and become bored very quickly if i start pursuing something.

That's not what's keeping you stuck.  You are what's keeping you stuck.  Those are simply job titles.

 

What do you really want?  Not job titles....

Security?

Compassion?

Prestige?

Find out what really makes you tick, and you can start to make some changes, and I haven't watched that video, but I bet it's awesome.  Watch it again.

And most importantly, give yourself a break! 

-Robert

-update I have watched the first 3 minutes of the video so far...it's completely awesome and totally on point.  

Edited February 26, 2020 by Robert Leavitt