Spreading your genes - Importance?

[Solvinden]

Hey everyone,

after watching Leo's video concerning reproduction,
I started contemplating the meaning of having children myself.

Personally, the only reason why I feel I MUST have children,
is indeed for spreading my genes.

However, I feel that I should come to the conclusion that it is both
okay to have or not have children. My current beliefs affect my life negatively.

I feel that a profound realization of non-duality or reincarnation (not identified with the body anymore) will lead
to the realization that it is not important whether one has children or not.
However, I'm not even close to these states right now, so I'm looking for other arguments.

Apart from that, Leo's argumentation wasn't very convincing in my opinion.
Sure, there are many forms of reproduction. But there is this urge in me that 
really wants to reproduce by having children. I see the irrationality and self-bias in that, but so what?

If after 200 years none of my biological information is left,
then I would also agree that it is not so important to reproduce biologically.
However, the amount of biological information in the following generations will stay approximately the same.
Sure, in every new generation the number of genes in each human being gets halved, but the number of humans that have your genes gets doubled.
And even when the sun explodes at some point, maybe humans have found ways to survive at other planets by that time.

I agree that I assign meaning to biological reproduction
and that there is nothing meaningful inherent to it.
Nevertheless, I can't transcend these thoughts right now because on some level I'm still not fully convinced.

I'd feel like a failure if I do not reproduce.
Most other things in life are much more short-lived, so I'm not too attached to it and consider them not so important.
But in this case it feels different, leading to neurotic thoughts of needing to have as many children as possible.

I'd love to get some input from you guys.
I feel that there are still some realizations to be made!

Love,
Solvinden

[AlphaAbundance]

It might be about the experience itself. The experience of taking care of another human being that is made from you can be rewarding. Also experimentation.

[Moreira]

Do you think your genes are valueable really? So be a sperm donator.

[lmfao]

If the kids will end up as neurotic as me, I think I'll pass. 

[Forestluv]

I can understand wanting to raise children. Yet I don’t understand the desire to pass on “my” genetic sequence. It would be like writing a book  and every 25 years, half the book gets scrambled into gibberish. After one lifetime of 100 years, it is completely illegible. It seems pointless to me.

And at least writing this book that is destined to decay would be something I personally created. In contrast, I feel no personal connection to my genetic sequence. It’s like an abstract idea to me. 

[sholomar]

I was late to the personal development game and finally after years of anxiety I'm managing to wire my nervous system and limbic brain to relax, cultivate my sense of humor by exposing myself to humor, and grow myself, but for me it's always been about being part Aspie and not good with women, not having "game" or any of the attributes in that video Leo has about 5 things women want, which is 100% true by the way.  I do have enough money I could quit my job now and move to the Philippines and take a mid 20's wife and have 4 kids, but I still have a few years of earning power and self improvement yet before I'll go that route.

I'm growing and bettering myself by the day, but like that Pink Floyd song says, I missed the starting gate. I do have 9 nieces and nephews so it's not like my genepool is going to die, not that it really matters anyways... we are largely genetically identical and 99.9% of us will be forgotten in 100 years.

Edited February 18, 2020 by sholomar