Any advice or texts for not being needy while Self-Actualizing? haha

[Hermaeus Mora]

It might seem like a silly question 

and I do not believe that I can get some clear answers about this on the internet but haha as the title says...

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After I had some enlightening experience, I quit my career and sorted out toxic relationships(including ex-girlfriend)

and started studying all by myself reading tons of books, etc. Just how amazing my life is going on nowadays.

I really appreciate you guys.

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But there is one big problem. After I stepped out of the so-called 'normal' life passage. I found my self really becoming needy in every situation.

This is not what I used to be. When I was in university and in work I did not much care about females.

Even in my early 20s during my military service, I was not this girl-looking monster.

You know, nowadays, even when I am in the library, I found myself busy looking around girls. How they look like what they are doing.
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At first, I thought it was funny looking at my own ego devilling around.

Furthermore, I thought it was just a general issue. I mean just a lack of human relationship.

(At least, this is definitely not a matter of having sex. I just feel lonely about something but I cannot define or articulate this issue clearly. )

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So I tried to start making friends. But it turned out that I do not need anything like that. It seems like I need a "Girlfriend".

The point is I am not sure about whether it is an Ego-calling or am I genuinely need a Partner. 
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Hmmm... what should I do? I really do not want to waste time at this point.

If you guys have any advice or specifically any articles which describe these behaviors. Plz, let me know.

May peace be with you!

Edited February 16, 2020 by Hermaeus Mora

[Average Investor]

In my experience if you feel the need for a relationship heavily, then I would not get into one. It sounds like you are dealing with loneliness. Since you mentioned the issue of wanting to find friends as well. I have found it really helpful to try to work through these things. It is still good to have contact with people though, so I am not saying for you to just remove everyone. But I was in a similar situation to yourself removing friends and a girlfriend about a year ago and it was totally worth it. I would suggest getting yourself to the point you can work through this issue because no matter how much you cover it up it will be there. As you age it will only get harder to not be lonely. So the sooner that you start to work through the issue the better.

Take good care of yourself though. Keep your hygiene up, exercise, eat well, etc.  Believe it or not you will actually reach a point where you can handle it. Getting there is not pleasant in my experience.  Now I am not telling you to go to a point where you are majorly depressed or something. If you need some interaction try posting here, join a club, etc. 

[Arcangelo]

You are a man evolution wants you to impregnate a woman. That's how it works, no mumbo jumbo.

[Meetjoeblack]

Statement of intent > asking.

No simping. Play to win.

 

What do you want? Put it out there. Let things pan out as they may. I don't text or call to chat. I'm pragmatic. If she's not coming, cool. Some other girl is. #next!

You don't have to be malicious about it but you must be ruthless with your time. No time vampires. The same for bad friends or negative people.

Don't overthink. If I text, no response or one word answer, I delete the contact and I go do more cold approach.