Lost All Motivation

[Infinite]

I'm not really sure how to properly convey this, but I have basically lost all motivation for everything except the pursuit of Enlightenment. I literally do not want anything other than to know the Truth of my being. I realized that I don't chase things in the "external" world because I want the things themselves, but because I want the feelings that I believe will arise out of the attainment of those things. This is pointless to me because if true happiness is what I seek, how could it ever be found externally? All external happiness is temporary, thus true eternal happiness would only arise when one is established within their true Self. Chasing anything other than Enlightenment feels like a pointless ego game to me, and I can't get myself to care anymore. Can anyone else relate to this, or does anyone have any advice for me? 

[Ayla]

I strongly (and I very rarely use this word) advise you to search for Mooji's videos on youtube. Thousands of people are where you are now. Me included

 

[Eye]

23 minutes ago, Infinite said:

Can anyone else relate to this, or does anyone have any advice for me? 

Just follow your higher excitement and if for you that's chasing enlightment and the Truth - so be it. Don't resist on that. That's my advice.

If you feel guilty about the lack of motivation - you will get the exact mirror of what's inside your guts/heart. Sorry, this is how this Universe works:)

 

 

[Mordecai]

Focus on internal improvement before external improvement.

If outward experiences or objects don't energize a sense of happiness or purpose inside, they are likely not worth your time. If this is causing you to slip in terms of internal progress, then you need to re-evaluate what it is that will help you obtain your goal(s). Each step in life is taken on a road and sometimes that road will take you to places you may not feel comfortable being in. This likely will involve external experiences and material objects. Use your motivation towards what you desire to incite motivation towards other things

[NariusV]

I've been there. As someone mentioned earlier, listen to some people describe their expereinces of no self. That gave me a context in which to relate, to realize that yes, life goes on even when the you that used to care is gone. I can only describe that somehow the human personality can become an autonomic/automatic expression of the authentic self, and that ultimately, it doesn't matter. 

Of course a lot of people will be worried if you just sit down and stop living, but I found my survival instincts or some biology kicked in and I could continue living my life, and slowly re-build a 'self' to live in the world with. The no self state can still do all the day to day actions, and yes, if you truly don't care, then it's easy to do. Not caring is much different than aversion. If you're actively avoiding things, that is something else to look at entirely.

It's a fine line to distingush between intuitional guidance to not do something, and a memory program of the past. Expereince and introspection are really the only way to go on with that that I have found.

Edited February 8, 2016 by NariusV

[jjer94]

6 hours ago, Infinite said:

I'm not really sure how to properly convey this, but I have basically lost all motivation for everything except the pursuit of Enlightenment. I literally do not want anything other than to know the Truth of my being. I realized that I don't chase things in the "external" world because I want the things themselves, but because I want the feelings that I believe will arise out of the attainment of those things. This is pointless to me because if true happiness is what I seek, how could it ever be found externally? All external happiness is temporary, thus true eternal happiness would only arise when one is established within their true Self. Chasing anything other than Enlightenment feels like a pointless ego game to me, and I can't get myself to care anymore. Can anyone else relate to this, or does anyone have any advice for me? 

This is very subtle, but humor me for a second. Could you consider that chasing enlightenment is just as much an ego game as anything else? Anything with a self-agenda is ego-based. Why do you want to know the Truth of your being in the first place (you can't know the Truth, by the way)? Because you want to be happy. You expect that some time in the future, you will be enlightened and boom, all problems solved, you will live happily ever after. As if salvation were in the future. Sounds pretty familiar to the ego's games, doesn't it?

Yes, all external happiness is temporary, and yes, true 'eternal happiness' would only arise when one discovers who they are. But that very idea is creating a self-agenda for you. You said it yourself: you're chasing after enlightenment, as if it were some external thing you can acquire. What if happiness were right here, right now, and it was never a matter of chasing after anything externally, but a matter of looking inwards to see what ideas are preventing you from seeing that happiness is already here? What hidden beliefs and agendas (like this one) are causing your suffering? Examine your own personal beliefs enough, and you may just arrive at Truth.

In the end, all games are pointless games, and the point of the game is playing it, not to win the prize at the end. Happiness is just a matter of being happy.

[Spider Jerusalem]

7 hours ago, Infinite said:

I'm not really sure how to properly convey this, but I have basically lost all motivation for everything except the pursuit of Enlightenment. I literally do not want anything other than to know the Truth of my being. I realized that I don't chase things in the "external" world because I want the things themselves, but because I want the feelings that I believe will arise out of the attainment of those things. This is pointless to me because if true happiness is what I seek, how could it ever be found externally? All external happiness is temporary, thus true eternal happiness would only arise when one is established within their true Self. Chasing anything other than Enlightenment feels like a pointless ego game to me, and I can't get myself to care anymore. Can anyone else relate to this, or does anyone have any advice for me? 

Based on my experience, this is generally an intermediate state (although I have no idea how much it lasts for any given individual).

It doesn't make sense to me that internal work and external work would be separate. Granted that you have to go inward at some point to start with, but I always find that the inward and outward work have to generally progress in parallel. After all, if the issue is one about totality, it's hard to see why the "external" stuff should be uninteresting and "internal" stuff should be exciting. It seems to me that as the internal world changes, the external changes concomitantly (perhaps with some lag sometimes)

My guess is that focusing on "enlightenment" (the concept) at the expense of everything else may just be another trap in path. Currently, I see no problem in meditating in the morning and watching a Metallica concert at night, since the concert experience will now be differently experienced because of the meditation. I'm assuming that experiencing is still important even on the "path," just how we experience something should change.

[Infinite]

2 hours ago, jjer94 said:

This is very subtle, but humor me for a second. Could you consider that chasing enlightenment is just as much an ego game as anything else? Anything with a self-agenda is ego-based. Why do you want to know the Truth of your being in the first place (you can't know the Truth, by the way)? Because you want to be happy. You expect that some time in the future, you will be enlightened and boom, all problems solved, you will live happily ever after. As if salvation were in the future. Sounds pretty familiar to the ego's games, doesn't it?

Yes, all external happiness is temporary, and yes, true 'eternal happiness' would only arise when one discovers who they are. But that very idea is creating a self-agenda for you. You said it yourself: you're chasing after enlightenment, as if it were some external thing you can acquire. What if happiness were right here, right now, and it was never a matter of chasing after anything externally, but a matter of looking inwards to see what ideas are preventing you from seeing that happiness is already here? What hidden beliefs and agendas (like this one) are causing your suffering? Examine your own personal beliefs enough, and you may just arrive at Truth.

In the end, all games are pointless games, and the point of the game is playing it, not to win the prize at the end. Happiness is just a matter of being happy.

Yes, chasing enlightenment is another ego game, and yes, happiness is right here in the present moment. I get that already, but since I am currently under the delusion that "I" even exist, I must undergo the process of seeking what I already am. How would Truth be found if it wasn't sought? And so, we play the game of separation, only to realize in the end that we already were what we were searching for.  

[jjer94]

3 minutes ago, Infinite said:

Yes, chasing enlightenment is another ego game, and yes, happiness is right here in the present moment. I get that already, but since I am currently under the delusion that "I" even exist, I must undergo the process of seeking what I already am. How would Truth be found if it wasn't sought? And so, we play the game of separation, only to realize in the end that we already were what we were searching for.  

If you read closely what I wrote, I'm not asking you to stop the journey altogether. I'm asking you to look for the obstructions that prevent you from seeing Truth. So yes, the you that you think you are is one of them. I'm asking you to look into yourself and your own agendas, to understand the character that you play. Why you do the things you do. No amount of words on these forums can help you with that. Self-examination is a very personal endeavor that only you can do. All the best, mate. 

"Rather than continuing to seek the truth, simply let go of your views." —Buddha

[Infinite]

10 minutes ago, jjer94 said:

If you read closely what I wrote, I'm not asking you to stop the journey altogether. I'm asking you to look for the obstructions that prevent you from seeing Truth. So yes, the you that you think you are is one of them. I'm asking you to look into yourself and your own agendas, to understand the character that you play. Why you do the things you do. No amount of words on these forums can help you with that. Self-examination is a very personal endeavor that only you can do. All the best, mate. 

"Rather than continuing to seek the truth, simply let go of your views." —Buddha

Apologies for my misunderstanding. Yes, ultimately I must go within to deconstruct the lies which prevent me from seeing Truth. Thank you for your responses, and I wish all the best to you too. 

[Infinite]

2 hours ago, Spider Jerusalem said:

Based on my experience, this is generally an intermediate state (although I have no idea how much it lasts for any given individual).

It doesn't make sense to me that internal work and external work would be separate. Granted that you have to go inward at some point to start with, but I always find that the inward and outward work have to generally progress in parallel. After all, if the issue is one about totality, it's hard to see why the "external" stuff should be uninteresting and "internal" stuff should be exciting. It seems to me that as the internal world changes, the external changes concomitantly (perhaps with some lag sometimes)

My guess is that focusing on "enlightenment" (the concept) at the expense of everything else may just be another trap in path. Currently, I see no problem in meditating in the morning and watching a Metallica concert at night, since the concert experience will now be differently experienced because of the meditation. I'm assuming that experiencing is still important even on the "path," just how we experience something should change.

If I want a holistic life, I should treat the "external" as I treat the "internal", but I just personally do not find as much interest within the "external" as within the "internal". I'm just not interested in anything that does not lead to Truth. I'm not even as interested in being entertained as I used to be. I still pursue self development (or I wouldn't be on this forum),  but I'm not as passionate about self development as I am about enlightenment. 

In response to what you said about the possibility of this being another trap on the path: I do see the validity in that, but I can assure you that this is not a trap because I am not fixated on concepts, but on the process of destroying all of the illusions which prevent "me" from seeing the Truth. 

You say that this is generally an intermediate state, are you saying that this disinterest will dissolve as I go deeper? 

[Spider Jerusalem]

31 minutes ago, Infinite said:

 You say that this is generally an intermediate state, are you saying that this disinterest will dissolve as I go deeper? 

Yes, at least in my case, the disinterest appeared for sure, but it just wore off over time. There is some residual disinterest in  many activities that used to be interesting earlier, but not a total all encompassing disinterest in external affairs. So, for example, I just refuse to be entertained by any activities which I understand very clearly to be not in my best interest (watching TV, drinking etc.), while certain things like writing, programming, and understanding how human society should be organized continue to hold great interest, even though they aren't apparently leading to the Truth in any obvious sense.

[Infinite]

11 minutes ago, Spider Jerusalem said:

Yes, at least in my case, the disinterest appeared for sure, but it just wore off over time. There is some residual disinterest in  many activities that used to be interesting earlier, but not a total all encompassing disinterest in external affairs.

Then I guess I should hold off on making the radical decision to become a Yogi, lol. How long have you been on this path, and how long did it take before the disinterest wore off? 

[Heart of Space]

11 hours ago, Infinite said:

I'm not really sure how to properly convey this, but I have basically lost all motivation for everything except the pursuit of Enlightenment. I literally do not want anything other than to know the Truth of my being. I realized that I don't chase things in the "external" world because I want the things themselves, but because I want the feelings that I believe will arise out of the attainment of those things. This is pointless to me because if true happiness is what I seek, how could it ever be found externally? All external happiness is temporary, thus true eternal happiness would only arise when one is established within their true Self. Chasing anything other than Enlightenment feels like a pointless ego game to me, and I can't get myself to care anymore. Can anyone else relate to this, or does anyone have any advice for me? 

I'm always kind of confused when people talk like this.  Happiness is a state of your biological brain and can only be temporary.  So, you're just trading one type of happiness for another arbitrarily because you think that one is worth more than the other.  I mean whatever floats your boat, it's your life and your decision. 

[Spider Jerusalem]

3 minutes ago, Infinite said:

Then I guess I should hold off on making the radical decision to become a Yogi, lol. How long have you been on this path, and how long did it take before the disinterest wore off? 

  I've never tracked any of this rigorously, but the disinterest felt like it lasted a few years, nothing insanely long. all I can say is that it doesn't appear to be permanent, at least in the default case.

[Infinite]

13 minutes ago, Heart of Space said:

I'm always kind of confused when people talk like this.  Happiness is a state of your biological brain and can only be temporary.  So, you're just trading one type of happiness for another arbitrarily because you think that one is worth more than the other.  I mean whatever floats your boat, it's your life and your decision. 

It doesn't have to be temporary if the happiness is based in simply being, rather than based in external conditions. The issue with this however, is that you are never going to be completely content with beingness itself because your ego will always resist conditions that it perceives as unfavorable. Because of this, you will forever remain in a perpetual cycle of suffering because you will forever be seeking the conditions that you believe will generate happiness, and resisting the conditions that you believe will generate suffering.

[Heart of Space]

5 minutes ago, Infinite said:

It doesn't have to be temporary if the happiness is based in simply being, rather than based in external conditions. The issue with this however, is that you are never going to be completely content with beingness itself because your ego will always resist conditions that it perceives as unfavorable. Because of this, you will forever remain in a perpetual cycle of suffering because you will forever be seeking the conditions that you believe will generate happiness, and resisting the conditions that you believe will generate suffering.

Ok, so are you claiming that the state of happiness is independent of the biological brain?  That doesn't make any sense.  You're getting a little woo woo on me here.  Perhaps you could explain further?

[Infinite]

3 minutes ago, Heart of Space said:

Ok, so are you claiming that the state of happiness is independent of the biological brain?  That doesn't make any sense.  You're getting a little woo woo on me here.  Perhaps you could explain further?

Lol, what is "woo woo" about it? The logic is simple after you understand why you suffer. The reason why you suffer is because "you" (what you believe yourself to be, aka the ego) is in constant resistance to the present moment. You are always running from what you believe will generate suffering, and running towards what you believe will generate happiness. This is flawed because what you believe will generate happiness is based in what is external, and happiness that arises externally is always temporary. If happiness that arises externally is always temporary, you will never truly be happy because you will be endlessly searching for it. If you were truly happy right now, you would have absolutely no reason to continue searching for it. The fact that you even have to look for happiness at all, automatically proves that you aren't truly happy. In order to end the endless cycle of inevitable suffering, you need to get your illusory ego to surrender to the present moment itself. By truly surrendering to the present moment, the illusory self dissolves, the true Self is shown, and the search for happiness based in conditions ends.  

[Heart of Space]

12 minutes ago, Infinite said:

Lol, what is "woo woo" about it? The logic is simple after you understand why you suffer. The reason why you suffer is because "you" (what you believe yourself to be, aka the ego) is in constant resistance to the present moment. You are always running from what you believe will generate suffering, and running towards what you believe will generate happiness. This is flawed because what you believe will generate happiness is based in what is external, and happiness that arises externally is always temporary. If happiness that arises externally is always temporary, you will never truly be happy because you will be endlessly searching for it. If you were truly happy right now, you would have absolutely no reason to continue searching for it. The fact that you even have to look for happiness at all, automatically proves that you aren't truly happy. In order to end the endless cycle of inevitable suffering, you need to get your illusory ego to surrender to the present moment itself. By truly surrendering to the present moment, the illusory self dissolves, the true Self is shown, and the search for happiness based in conditions ends.  

Ok, I follow most of everything in this post.  What I have issue with is some of the stuff you said earlier.  Do you disagree with this statement: "Happiness is a state of the biological brain and can only be temporary."  And if you do disagree, why? 

Edited February 9, 2016 by Heart of Space

[Infinite]

2 minutes ago, Heart of Space said:

Ok, I follow most of everything in this post.  What I have issue with is some of the stuff you said earlier.  Do you disagree with this statement: "Happiness is a state of your biological brain and can only be temporary."  And if you do disagree, why? 

I agree that happiness is simply a mental state and all mental states that are based on conditions are transient, but why couldn't it be everlasting for as long as you are alive, so long as it was beyond conditions?