I feel lost in depression.

[from chaos into self]

I have had so much advice given to me on how to deal with emotional problems, but I still struggle with them. mindfulness and meditation only work for so far, then I'm back in the pits. I've learned CBT and DBT and WRAP but they seem immaterial and like a waste of time. I just don't see joy in life, don't feel like I have purpose, as in any purpose I see seems pointless and futile. I don't want this life that I have - and then even deeper, I don't want to be alive in this era. It feels like the end of the world is approaching. What is even the point of trying to take care of myself?

 

I'm just looking for some advice. What has helped you to have "even this must pass" and wade through the darkness into a better life?

[ajasatya]

@from chaos into self As crazy and tough as it sounds, you choose the life you have. Nobody else can make your life better. It's completely up to you. Get up and walk.

[mandyjw]

Do you know what era is, spelled backwards? 

Are. I just noticed that 10 minutes ago, because I was looking closely at my daughter's shirt which says "Unicorns are real".

There are a lot of thoughts and stories we can fall into about life and how we fit into it. Our true nature is that we are one with it, we just are. As you know meditation is a powerful way to get in touch with that peace. Your isness, or in a greater sense your areness , because everything is perfect as it is until thought says it's not. 

Make a list of things to do that lift your spirits, cat videos on youtube, drawing, painting, music, time in nature, whatever does it for you and make a big effort to do three of them every single day. Continue with meditation and mindfulness using them as tools to build on one another. Focus on where you want to go, focus on the story you want to write in your life and inspiration, purpose and vision will flood in.

 

 

[TheHealer]

It's always the present moment, but this "present moment" business is nuanced. Get in touch with your emotions and try to separate your awareness of the emotions from the emotions themselves. Keep doing that until something clicks, and then you won't suffer any longer.

[from chaos into self]

On 2/6/2020 at 10:19 PM, TheHealer said:

It's always the present moment, but this "present moment" business is nuanced. Get in touch with your emotions and try to separate your awareness of the emotions from the emotions themselves. Keep doing that until something clicks, and then you won't suffer any longer.

do you honestly believe that you'll never suffer?

[Robert Leavitt]

@from chaos into self I rarely suffer anymore.   But I used to suffer...badly.  I had BiPolar and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  It took a lot of work, I took up Christianity, I started praying like crazy and then I did a TON of work.  Surrendering to the present moment is difficult, especially if you haven't done any work on the core beliefs that drive all the thoughts that we have, "Automatic" thoughts.  Or "Sticky" thought patterns that are super persistent.

REBT was a huge help for me.  I learned to practice acceptance, and just let things be the way they are.  I know it all sounds kinda made up and mystical, and I can't give you a direct answer that will fit exactly what you need at this exact moment, but I encourage you to keep trying.  One day it just clicks and it's like "OHHHHH...." and you can experience a series of "A-HA" moments that can change everything forever.

Don't give up, it can happen.  It happened to me and it was a huge miracle, but I was focused entirely on the process and the using of tools..not the results.  The results came because of an almost fanatical obsession of diligently using tools...not dwelling on my pain and misery.

Peace and Love,

Robert

[from chaos into self]

@Robert Leavitt thanks for the reply

[Michael569]

Don't suffer alone, there are people out there who could make an incredible difference to your life. Your depression may be physiological or psychological hard to say. 

A good naturopath will be able to identify the cause and then tailor a plan for you. They can look at your lifestyle, stress, diet, relationships, emotional health etc. Give it a try. Or life coaching can be extremely beneficial. 

[Preety_India]

 

 

I can give 3 tips 

 

1. Emotional comfort. I used to indulge in eating and cutting in order to get emotional comfort. However it wasn't healthy. Over time I have realized that the body/mind craves emotional comfort one way or the other and even seeks it in unhealthy ways. So turn it to something healthy. Like playing, exercise, listening to peaceful music, relaxation exercises, laughter therapy. 

2. Living a clean life. Try cutting out bad habits and anything bad/addictive, it saps or drains your emotional energy 

 

 

3.  Writing a vision board and taking baby steps towards 2 important things - SELF CARE and PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT /PD. 

 

Hope this helps. 

 

 

Edited February 11, 2020 by Preety_India

[cetus]

@from chaos into self   @from self into chaos may have been a more definitive user name?

On 2/2/2020 at 10:14 AM, from chaos into self said:

I see seems pointless and futile. I don't want this life that I have - and then even deeper, I don't want to be alive in this era.

"I never met a man that gave me more trouble then myself"

[arlin]

On 2/2/2020 at 4:31 PM, ajasatya said:

@from chaos into self As crazy and tough as it sounds, you choose the life you have. Nobody else can make your life better. It's completely up to you. Get up and walk.

 

Have you had a depressive and lost in life episode and how did you get out of it? What did you learn from it? 

Thanks. 

[ajasatya]

5 hours ago, arlin said:

Have you had a depressive and lost in life episode and how did you get out of it? What did you learn from it? 

Thanks. 

Yes I have. My solution was a deep deconstruction. New social circle, new clothes, new places. Even a new name.

I learned that resistance to what is is a serious problem

[Prevailer]

Being stuck in a pit of depression and despair (whilst trying to put on a face to family friends and society) with absolutely no means or skills to get out of that pit is awful.I’ve been there and when there is no hope on the horizon, the anxiety takes hold then the paranoia kicks in. Then, when it peaks, really negative mind chatter voices kick in, which crush you even more and seriously can take you down completely if you let them.You have all this stuff going on in your head daily whilst you are desperately trying to hold it all together.Truly awful as you can’t run away from your mind.The answer is in the moment ...in the moment...in the moment as has already been suggested.The problem of trying to find the moment and stay there is a very difficult journey to walk...but you have no choice...you have to walk it.You need to learn a lot of skills that enable you to stay in the moment.I threw myself into my Christianity ....prayed  a lot/repented a lot/meditated a lot.Very very slowly the aahhh moments took hold and then increased with frequency and are increasing daily now.Remember you are not thoughts...you just have thoughts.Try to meditate on who you are when you are not thinking.You are a presence within a body.Meditate  on creating a silence (buffer) within your mind between your presence and your thoughts.

[archi]

 

On 2/2/2020 at 4:14 PM, from chaos into self said:

 It feels like the end of the world is approaching. What is even the point of trying to take care of myself?

 

I'm just looking for some advice. What has helped you to have "even this must pass" and wade through the darkness into a better life?

Realize "being is enough".

Do 2week dark room retreat.

[Gurian]

Have you thought about the source of the problem? Maybe for now its crucial moment to change your life and set goals. Maybe you have an old dream that is worth to do at this very moment. First of all you should start to do something and then you will see that there are some things that you can contribute to this world. I had a depression and after 2 month I decided to move from Germany to the property in France as I wanted to learn how to design and a deep knowledge of art from the best artists. Now I am feeling that I live and recommend you to start your own journey!