Just a little bit of love

[Azis]

gg

[SilentTears]

@Azis nice to meet you good sir 

alright, journal

meditation: I did something like 10 min a little while ago. 

Channting: nada

mood: very positive and upbeat. Whenever I meditate I get put into these uplifting moods that last a few hours. It's a really enjoyable experience 

some thoughts 

1) my goal is not to understand  "truth". (Well, I guess I wish to understand the teachings of self love) 

my goal is to love. My goal is to live my highest life, one full of love, peace, fulfillment and contentment with every moment. 

I seek to uplift the emotions/ moods of others. 

Seeing everyone as beautiful beings and loving them, for who and where they are really helps. 

2) my heart has felt kinda "stuck" like a pressure is in my heart chakra. I once had an experience for a few weeks where my heart chakra would shoot extreme heat into my upper body. Now I can feel that it's "stuck" I'm gunna have to go look into heart chakra meditations and see what's up. 

3) I just enjoy my time on this earth, co-creating with everyone else. It's not about the outcome, it's about the journey.

Love just to love.  

Edited February 19, 2020 by SilentTears
1+1=love. Cause, love is always the answer xD

[SilentTears]

So, it's been some time since I've posted on my journal. So much has happened. 

My main theme is divine masculine and divine feminine. I finally understand.

By embodying both, we really see things in such a different light. Females understand men more then men do lol. 

So let me share something, Little by little I've become more and more masculine. True yang. Fire. I've embodied it to the extreme. I've felt like a true man. If that makes sense to the person reading. 

The divine masculine resists the divine feminine. Once someone awakens their divine feminine you are in balance with oneself. As long as we stop resistance. And example of what I'm talking about is acting like a girl while being a "male" 

so let me restart. 

Yesterday I chatted with my best friend, But he would always trigger me. For no reason I would get triggered and we realized that it's when he embodies his divine feminine. My divine masculine would resist so much. The more masculine I became I would resist him more and more. I would never want to talk or when we did talk I would get triggered. We discovered that whenever he embodies his divine feminine I would feel this resistance come from my soul. The place in between my heart and solar plexus. 

I felt this "fire" there. I could feel the degrees in which he embodied more of his yin nature. His natual chart showed his masculine and feminine at both 5 while my masculine was at 8 and feminine at 2. Long story short. We talked and since we figured it out he switched to embodying his masculine side. I would no longer get triggered by anything he said and I felt fine chatting with him. 

I then discovered or felt like I had a twin flame. It's been a theme that's been coming up a lot in my life. I never understood them till now. The girl I loved would always feel resistance when I used to embody my divine feminine and chase her. Then I switched and unconsciously switched to more of a divine masculine nature and stoped caring. I no longer cared and the roles switched (I still don't fully understand this, since online they say you can only be divine feminine or divine masculine. It just feels right to call her my twin flame if that makes sense? Maybe it's another connection that I'm just associating as twin flame.)

This is only understood by people who have awakened both inside of them. Anyone who has awakened both can switch between the two and have different degrees. I became a girl, literally. I saw from a girls perspective. I emoboided the divine feminine. Yin to the extreme is such a good listener. We both realized soooo much about both of our natures. I finally tapped into both. he has delt with this his whole life. Saying as a kid he never understood his feminine side and would resist it so much. I never understood until yesterday. 

Girls understand guys so much better then we understand ourselves. Like we created all these amazing analogies. And example of one was that divine masculine is like a sun, Shining brightly. While the divine feminine is very cold and doesn't care about the shining masculine. Another one was a divine masculine when angry is like touch me and you will burn while the divine feminine is you look at me you burn. I've never been angry while in my feminine state as I've only fully embodied it yesterday, but that is the example he gave me. It fit so much for the masculine side that I'm sharing it here. 

He also shared a lot of the insigts he has gotten since he was a child, which really helped me understand this feminine side.

Femine is very caring. Like a mature women. It was such an eye opener. I realized so much and when I finally embodied/ switched from a divine masculine to the divine feminine I cried. There was soooo much that happened yesterday that I would have to use pages of words to explain what happened. I can now tap into both divine masculine and feminine. Different degrees. Use and switch to solve problems. 

I have grown once again. 

Also, if anyone has had the chance to awaken to both their divine energies I would love to hear about it oh yeah, I no longer get triggered by his femine side since I've experienced the divine feminine side. 

Oh some of my own insigts are: 

when I embodied the femine side I contemplated and I realized that sex no longer means the same thing. It's about connection. I also had zero drive for goals and saw that I stoped caring about sex. I had all this sexual energy before and once I became a "girl" I stoped unconsciously seeking it. 

Wow, this is truly amazing. My whole perspective on life has changed. I realized that the divine masculine has all these judgements about the feminine and the feminine is so kind. I just wanna go on and on about my insigts. 

Like, the divine feminine is such a good listener. She doesn't look at you while she listens but she actually wants to hear what you have to say. while the divine masculine is always trying to talk over someone or share what they just thought. He wants eye contact and all this extra stuff. 

Oh and when I'm in the divine masculine state my body is more "open" like my arms are open and my legs are not so close together. But in the divine feminine state all my body parts are touching each other. It feels nice to curl up. 

if anyone relates then I would love to listen. 

Edited February 22, 2020 by SilentTears

[SilentTears]

Journal 

meditation: not sure how long

mood: kinda good. Got kinda agitated from my cat. That needs self reflection on my part. 

Notes:

1) I am kinda feeling these attachments. Not like mental attatments, but physical energy attatments connected to my body right now. I noticed that when I clean my energy by asking angels, archangels and my spirt guides for help while doing visualization I tend to get rid of these feelings and I feel so much better. 

2) I got sick like 3 days ago. Don't really wanna talk about that

3) I became really energy sensitive these past few days. When my sickness first kicked in I could feel peoples energy flow through my legs when they walked passed me or spoke.  

Later that night I tapped into the divine feminine. I am now in the divine masculine. More yang. 

4) I have this lack of passion for some reason. I have zero drive for external stimuli and I just wanna sit down and meditate. I seem to have this slight resistance to meditation when I try and sit down now in days. I'll move around or open my eyes out of lack of awareness. Catch myself but 10 sec later I'm back to it again. 

[SilentTears]

I am kinda lost. Lost is not the right word. seem to have a lack of addictions. This may sound weird, but when you don't have addictions you don't know what to do with yourself (since you unconsciously go from one to another to run away from the emptiness. It's a "good"emptiness you just don't know that). I notice I'm seeking to fill myself up with something, but nothing interests me. It's very surfacelevel even if I do indulge in something. 

I went to the market and I had no cravings for anything. Saw sweets and other foods. Nope. Saw healthy food. Meh. I usually like healthy food. Or the idea of buying healthy food. Since it didn't matter I did want to get healthy food over junk food.

I'm not sure what to do. I'm just sitting here. No urge to watch anything. No urge to even type this. I'm doing it because there a thought about it. Thoughts are one of the things I still have. I've been focusing on concentration meditations as of late. 

[SilentTears]

So, I'm realizing how unconscious I am. Hahaha omg, the second I read that the song I was listening to said "it's okay we all forget". It said it in a way I would usually miss it but it just hit me so hard hahaha omg that's amazing. Thanks angels and sprit guides. 

Okay, so I am seeing my delivery and unconscious actions I have. 

Wow, I was reading stuff about something that happened 8 months go. I've changed a lot. That's what opened up my eyes to my new found loss of consciousness. I've developed other positive traits but I've lost a chuck of my awarnesss. I used to just laugh at things that would now get my triggered. If someone tried to project their issues into me I would be like what? *laughs* then try to help and if they were not open then they usually left me alone. Everthing just always worked out. It still does, but things worked magically. And I always accepted that as normal. Which that is normal. 

[SilentTears]

Ah, I wanted to edit, but then I realized it never matters so I'll create a new post. "But what if people think I'm making a new post to up my post count?" What? Hahaha who cares if they do? Are they really that preoccupied with my life and do you think people who are actulizing their life care about how many posts I have? Na. 

Today ive felt this anger inside me. I was getting so triggered by everthing and everyone. I went home, ate and felt better. I'm now genuinely happy. My emotions. Yes, awareness/ consouness raises my levels of emotions. How to raise my consciousness? I could meditate more, but I was a strong kick. Always the quick fixes. Damn, I'll just build my old habits. contemplation, and various meditations. 

[SilentTears]

Now I'm creating a new post to try and break the fear I have about creating new posts.

Right after writing the post before I lost myself to thoughts. I feel more consciousness by keeping my mind on itself. 

I got distracted while writing this post! It was a good distraction. I was feeling so amazing so I started listening to music and dancing. Just by focusing on my thoughts and getting more consciousness by doing so I got hit with extreme happiness. Do I distract myself with good feelings? But they feel so good. I just wanna get lost in them. Absorb them and become them. Live them. Be them. Have them. See all that "want" but I am what I am. Says the ego trying to saying "I exist I exist" of course you exist. You were imagined by these thoughts I get. 

I want people to see their own delivery! That's what ive been doing. I do things to play along. I play along to wake people up. Maybe they do the same. We are all playing the game to wake each other up, but we first want the other to wake up before we are like "fine, I'll wake up too now" 

what I mean by all that is if someone did something unconscious and projected that to me I would fight them. Not physically. Mentally. "Why did you do that?" Nicely said by me. Then the game is started. You see. I say that then they either realize "oh shit, I acted from the unconscious side of me, sorry. Love light light love" or we are both sucked into playing this unconscious game to wake each other up. 

Edited February 27, 2020 by SilentTears

[SilentTears]

I love Marianne Williamson! Ahh. She is so amazing. A mod posted a video of her endorsing Bernie (first time I’m ever hearing about her) and she just blew my mind. I mean yes, her ideas were great, but I loved her energy. Her enthusiasm and how she delivered herself. She lighted a fire. When I saw that happen within my self I went “wow”. I could see the masculine energy which I found lovely as fuck. 

I went into more of her older work. Not her old old work but her ideology for when she was running for president and I really resonated with her. She actually reminds me a bit of myself. 

Alright, 

journal 

meditation: 15 min

mood: I was really in and still am in a high flying mood. I was kinda purposeless earlier today, but somehow got distracted into this good mood.

notes:

1) I saw purposelessness today. Wow, I did not know what to do. I wanted something to do. What helped was taking a walk. 

 

[SilentTears]

Ahhh. My awareness is shit! It’s so shit! 

I was looking at some old messages because now my life is not on the extreme happiness side and I saw how aware I was. I was so aware talking about things it triggered awareness inside of me. Now I’m sad. Like, throughout my day to day I am doing bullshit things to try and feel good. Why not just meditate or contemplate. Why Joseph? Why are you not enjoying life like before? Do you just get super happy and bliss out on life like before? No? What? You now sit down wishing for your old life back? Why? Why not just change it now. Meditation is key. Joseph just meditate and when you got a problem contentment that shit. Bring awareness on your problems and your life to make an amazing life. Clear the illusions. 

I used to be aware. I said things which I would not say now. 

I’m lonely as fuck. Today and yesterday I felt it. Before I could sit alone and laugh. I’m comparing myself to my old self. My life is honestly really great and I can do a lot. Just the lack of awareness. 

My goal is to increase my awareness as much as possible. Meditation non stop. Contemplating nonstop. I gotta get back into those habits which increased my love and happiness levels. To a place where I can stay and do nothing and bliss out on life. 

My new goal is to increase my awareness as much as possible. I’m done with low consciousness activities. I’m done. 

Edit: wow, just reading things I said from the past increase my awareness. I’m shocked by how much I knew! I’ve fallen. Ive become a fallen angel. Omg that is a perfect description. I’m a fallen angel trying to regain my holiness.

Edited March 2, 2020 by SilentTears

[SilentTears]

Taking consciousness work seriously has raised my awareness significantly. I am noticing how I will be aware for like 15 seconds then fall right back asleep. It’s easy to get lost in the every day life. Keep strong on the mindfulness. Who am I? Where am I? Who is thinking these thoughts? Why do I experience what I experience? Why do any of this? Who is thinking? Where do your thoughts come from? How do I know this is “real”? 

 

I was contemplating hardcore and the world started to become ungrounded. I got a glimpse of the trueness. The trueness that reality is but a thought, thought up by us to keep us in this illusion. Reality literally started to deconstruct, but my ego/ mind caught it and brought it back to the groundness I believe it to be. 

Edit: I am noticing that whenever I start crazily questioning “who am I?” “Who is experiencing this?” “Who even is writing this?” My mind will sometimes blank out. I will catch glimpses of something. Idk what it is. But I know it’s something important. I feel as if I’m grasping at air, but that air is the most important thing. This is all me contextualizing something that happens in the moment. It’s but a fleeting moment 

Edited March 2, 2020 by SilentTears

[SilentTears]

I know nothing. I love everthing. Is that not something. These are all just concepts of my own worldview. Everthing I could ever say is from my own judgments. I mean everything I say has my own core values and beliefs fused into it. I am seeing all the unconscious "bullshit" I notice how I judge myself and others for their lack of living up to my values. 

What? You get triggered easily. Well let me judge you for it. 

What? You are judging others? Bad, you should do this instead. Let me help you

what? Everything is perfectly and could be no other way. Yeah, true true. See how I just identified with that thought. Ahhhhh 

i kinda confused myself. I mean, everthing is absolutely perfect and beautiful no matter what or who it is. I love everything and everyone, but then I can also jump into  (Who is jumping....) 

its like I can't speak or I realize I'm not living up to the standards I have installed. 

 

Let me restart. I was being a zen devil, projecting my own values onto others. I would see the unconsciousness of myself. And then I saw everything as beautiful. Any being is perfect. I know it's all perfect, but there is something. I have this auto reaction. Where does it come from? Anything, is not "us" it's just auto reactions from unconsciousness. There is no "you" I mean. Just auto reactions. Wtf, how can an auto reAction have feelings, thoughts, a sense of self. I keep grasping something and it makes me have this unconditional love for everthing then I try to rationalize it. I try to make sense of my understanding. See I even typed "my" but it's all perfect. If I even try to speak my judgments slip through. Anything that can Be said has our own beliefs and values corrupting it. Even this. This is filled with all my values. Who am I to have values? I mean who am I? It's like I keep grasping at air. I'm nothing. I can't seem to find anything. All I "see" is an automatic reaction. I don't know where my word, values, thoughts, actions come from. This is one deep ass rabbit hole. 

Why is it that when "I" this thought. Questions it's own existence and all these things that are not usually questioned I get this fire in my chest. I feel all this love for everyone and everthing. I see the perfection of everyone. This life could be no other way then what it is. All these understanding makes these paradoxes. The paradoxes really fuck my mind. It's like my mind is trying to grab water or sand. It just keeps slipping through. Then I realize that there is no self to even have these experiences. It's all just a thought that has identified with its own values. I try to explain non duality. My own non dual experiences and perspectives then My other understandings of what is what gets in my way. Maybe I should just shut it all off. We can think and think forever. A thought can just think more thoughts. Thoughts that the thought doesn't even know where it comes from. 

 

I get these understanding my mind blanks for a moment then I'm back to the auto reactions of typing, thinking, acting, judging, putting up standards. If I didn't have this. I feel like everything would collapse. I got scared. I identified with all that. How could I kill myself. If I let all that go then. See! It's all just thoughts, a thought trying to. Ahhh. I love life. 

Thats it for today, I'm just gunna feel instead of trying to make sense of this. 

Feel and try and clear my mind. 

Edit: when I shut off my mind I noticed that I would quickly go to unconscious and auto pilot behavior. I would then quickly judge myself for it. I would then catch myself. Bring myself back to no thoughts. Then a repeat. I'm loving this moment so much I could die. This feeling in My chest.

i wonder if you guys also get that feeling in the chest. It's just another place I'm identifying with. Trying to speak is like pushing two same magnets together. It's like trying to explain to someone a new color you have seen. You can't. A new color was created, but how do you explain it. You will first try and pour your old understanding of other colors, but that just gets in the way of explaining the new color. It's like a blue and pink. No, it's like... (old understanding). 

Edited March 6, 2020 by SilentTears
You create the reason. You believe in the reason. You are the reason.

[SilentTears]

Mood: love. Love. And some more passion

im journaling:

1) I have to shoot my self into this place of becoming my thoughts to talk to you. I can't leave the identity of thoughts which makes me but a thought and nothing at the same time. To talk to you I have to believe in. Thoughts. I have to have my world view. I have to have my understandings, values and belifes. 

2) just be

3) I'm now going to identify with a thought. Earlier today, I studdly started becoming more aware and I just stoped doing my work. I blanked out. This girl was trying to comfort me and asking me "what's the matter" I felt amazing, but she thought I was suffering. I saw unconditional love rise inside me a little later and right when my eyes started watering from all the love someone grabbed my shoulders asking for help on some work. 

I was so attached to my work. Then I realized it all doesn't matter. Nothing matters. It's all perfect. No need to do anything. Just be. Enjoy the beautiful life that is right in front of us. I didn't want to work. I didn't want to do any of it. I wanted to just bliss out on these feelings. I wanted to leave and go home. I've done it before. I've left and really did the minimum I had to do for a few months. Then my consciousness lowered and I started doing it all again. Now that my consciousness is rising I see the pointlessness in doing it. It's already perfect. We can create reason, but that's just more thoughts someone's identifying with. Anyway, I stuck it out and just did everything I needed to do. I then did something I wasn't supposed to do by some made up standards people have identified with. I felt shame and guilt in my stomach. I didn't understand why. I know better, but I still felt them. I just watched it. 

4) j noticed that the girl I used to love was thought of when I started to feel unconditional love. I'm thinking that it may have had to do with some past experiences. In the past I've often been talking to her when I suddenly was bitch slapped by love. I would just see the beautiful reality that was always here. I was just blind to it. I am noticing my awareness leave me as I stoped questioning thoughts, my existence and all that stuff. So I'll leave it for today.

[SilentTears]

Journal 

meditation: yeh, like 10 min

mood: today has really been an odd one, overall I have really enjoyed all the emotions I have experienced 

notes

1) there are a few things I want to express. I am seeing the judgements, lack of awareness, etc in others. I can see where they express their own understandings on others. It's all trying to be fit inside their world view. If you go against it then they have an explanation and they subtlety or not so subtlety pass their judgment onto the person. people call this devilry. I am seeing people's devilry. But that is just a judgement from me. It's a judgement and an observation. It's looking at someone from a point of view that places them in a imaginary box of values. It's hard to speak without unconsciously passing my own understandings and judgments. I can come from a place of love and call someone a devil. Isn't that still just passing judgement onto them? What you see goes through our lens of understandings, beliefs, and values. Then these words that seem to come from no where appear. 

Everything I have said up there is neither good nor bad. how should one express themselves without the "judgements". Of course the judgments are not "bad". 

Im trying to rap my mind/ awareness around the concept of good and bad. Right and wrong. I still have these structures and programraming. 

Someones frame of reference comes from all that I have said above^^. It's neither good nor bad from the perspective that I'm embodying. People have these judgments and my auto reaction is to "correct" them. But that's just going through my lens of understanding. If I try to correct someone then that's just pushing my values onto that person. I can not "help" someone without stuffing them full of my own bellies, understandings and values.you cannot "help". They are perfect. 

[SilentTears]

2) In class today, I got hit with this overwhelming emotion (can't express it. It felt similar to what I experience when I tap into unconditional love). It brought me to tears. My eyes got super watery and I tried to cover up my eyes  (It honestly was kinda of an addictive feeling). To cover up this emotion, since I didn't want to start crying in class I just let lose intellectually. I often tend to hold myself back for the class. I quickly grasp things and understand them very easily, but I don't answer right away to help out the other students in my class. So once I let lose I quickly started explaining and solving problems. My teacher must have felt the energy, because as soon as I let lose he started going off and explaining these "complex" (it was easy) problems. I was having fun. 

I saw my intelligence, it felt good to see value in myself. My intelligence has been coming up more and more lately. I'm seeing the coralation between consciousness and intelligence. The more consciousness I become the more people call me "intelligent". I went through a phase of high consciousness for a few months( when I went through my first awakening) and I was often told "wow, your so smart" "how are you so intelligent" "you do these things which are really intelligent" etc. I started raising my consciousness again and for the past few days/ weeks people have been telling me how intelligent I am. 

I have often been told that since I was a child, I just think I become more intellectual when I raise my consciousness. 

3) my life has been really great ever since that one day I took raising my consciousness seriously. It was Sunday, I just got so fed up with a low conscious state of being. I took seriously the state of awareness I am in throughout my day to day life. This "now". 

Edited March 6, 2020 by SilentTears

[SilentTears]

Now I'm curious! I'm seeing others that are able to tap into unconditional love like me. How do they do it? I can tap into unconditional love I feel I put in some earphones and ask "who am I?"

is it odd that when I meditate or do self inquiry I just get hit with so much love. Is that a trap? A trap full of love? I can keep pushing for an answer and sometimes reality will kinda feel funny. I'll feel like I'm at the tip of something. I feel that I'm close to my answer just not quite there. I'll still feel love, but reality will morphe. 

An example is that if I get serious about self inquiry sometimes my mind will shut off. I can feel it click off and become still. Then my door and wall with start to become wavy. This lasts about a second. During that time I sometimes feel like I've seen something, but I can't explain what. I can't seem to express what I've experienced. No words can describe. It honestly feels like I'm trying to grab at water. I can't hold it. At least not with force. Or try to understand it. I say "it". I can't explain what happens during that split second 

all I know is that whatever happens then raises my base level of love and happiness. I'm more fulfilled throughout my days. I'm loving life. when at school I'll be hit with emotions so extreme I wanna cry from the beauty. Hello, are you going through the same? Really? That's crazy.

[SilentTears]

Mood: thank you very much

honestly, my life is so amazing that I’m getting tears in my eyes just typing it. 

It reminds of when Leo spoke in one of his videos looking back on his past few years and he also got teary eyed. 

Anyway,  

notes, 

1) mmmmm John Lennon is an amazing artist and singer. My favorite song right now is imagine by John Lennon. 

I love how his wife looks at him and he does to her. They have a very lovely connection 

I love how his voice is beautiful 

anywayyy, life is great. Continue to be great. Be yourself. Live yourself. Have love. Be love. Your amazing just the way you are. I deeply love you. Cool, just know that there will be times you will experience different emotions. That’s fine. If you so seek to be in a higher state of emotions and feeling then some practices I like to do are: love and gratitude practices. Meditation and self inquiry. Listen to some music and feel my way to a good feeling place. Think in terms of “now” and how this is all now

[SilentTears]

Just something real quick. So, I went an hour into the future. Sounds super weird and odd from the “ego” “mind” “thinking” perspective. I mean how can you change time? I didn’t change time. Ofc most people here know that time is an illusion by oneself when they identify with thoughts. Anyway, I happened to get up to feed my cat after messaging someone and then when I came back i was an hour in the future. At first I was like “what?”. But this was a great realization that anything is possible. 

If your reading this and not so deep into this work a tip I have is to watch your mind. Watch how you thought of this. Was it “crazy?” “Weird?” “Delusional?” Do you believe me? Do you “agree”? Those are mainly judgements and thoughts filtered through our beliefs and core values. 

One last thing. I am noticing how the ego mind/ myself, tries to “help” others from its relative point of view. It’s kinda interesting to watch(a judgement. It’s “good” because it’s interesting) anyway, flipping through perspectives changes my judgments and beliefs. If I drop all beliefs and understandings then that’s just another perspective. 

Have a nice day, love y’all. 

[SilentTears]

Uhh, yeah, it was daylight savings yesterday so that’s why there was an hour gap. 

I feel like a fool! Self judgment and self criticism of myself. 

Journal. 

1) played a lot of video games. I haven’t truly played in a long time. I feel better not playing video games then playing them. I met someone online and they seemed really sweet and I felt like I knew them even though we only talked very briefly. 

Its odd, I connect to people in weird ways. There are three times I felt this way in my soul. One was for the girl I used to like and she was a big impact on my life for over a year now. The other time was when I met my crush before that girl^^. Okay, so I just noticed a pattern... each time I have felt this way it was always a girl. I watched it and I got this feeling in my chest. My heart beat once and it felt like a dam broke. 

Honestly, it reminds me of when I was going through the dark night of the soul. I had this extreme heat in the upper part of my chest. It would come from my heart chakra and I had no idea why.

[SilentTears]

When thinking about my journey and all that I've been through, how much I have grown. I start to get tears eyed. My nose gets tiggily. I've gone through so much. It makes me feel good to think about these things. I love what I have been through. I've had so many life experiences and realizations at the age of 16. I can see the beauty. 

Meditation: 20 min

I woke up late today 30 min before my class starts and it takes 30 min to get to school walking xd. At first I saw an auto reaction of wanting to rush. But before it could come into my experience my high vibe state was like "na, son, we are gunna enjoy this moment". Seriously, I wake up in these really good moods so I saw there was no need to rush or anything. I got ready in a few min, but right before I left I got the urge to check my photos. I was just captivated by a few select photos. 

Someone who has been coming back into my life through synchronizations is my ex- best friend. (I will edit this and explain later) I saw pictures of her that I had and just got emotional. Not sadness or any emotion that I can label. It was a feeling in the chest that has no label. It's not a common emotion I guess. As I've never seen someone label it as something. I call this feeling "soul connection". 

Someone on the forum was saying how there is no true romantic love, but I don't agree. I have unconditional romantic love no matter what for another. I say romantic because I have the feelings of passion and whatever we experience when we get in that state. I also have unconditional love for them. I really contemplated if it was unconditional.. the answer: yes, it is.