How do i integrate the Feminine?

[moon777light]

This question is especially for @Emerald and @mandyjw, i feel like you two are good in this area

 do you have any tips on how to integrate the feminine in a healthy manner? How do i start loving my feminine side?

I ordered the book "Women Who run with the Wolves" i heard its really good for fem aspect. Any other book recs? The booklist has only books good for male side haha

Edited January 30, 2020 by moon777light

[mandyjw]

It's mostly a matter of self judgement, having been raised in a culture that has very masculine (or rather goal driven) values, we may unconsciously judge ourselves or dismiss the importance of things we consider feminine. 

It's important to get in tune with your desires, notice what makes you happy and notice any judgmental thoughts you have around these things not being important or being silly. Anything self care related is a good place to start. For example it might seem silly to carefully decorate your room, or to pick a flower bring it in and put it in a vase. You may have trained yourself to deny the being and appreciation in simple things by asking yourself "what's the point" or feeling it's silly or a waste of time. Doing things simply for pleasure and not for any goal whatsoever is important. 

The funny thing is that these things aren't inherently feminine on closer inspection. It's about loving more fully loving and accepting who you are, who you chose to be. Buddha did a meditation on a single flower. Simple things are really not simple at all, there is great love in small things, it's only the mind that assumes otherwise. It is only us who feels the weight of importance or feels the shame of insignificance.

It's also really important to notice how you are preventing yourself from feeling or being vulnerable. Because we often feel vulnerable as women we prevent ourselves from feeling that way, and prevent ourselves from discovering the true strength and power that is actually there beneath that. In the end, it's all really just about self love.

Edited January 31, 2020 by mandyjw

[Meetjoeblack]

On 1/30/2020 at 0:30 PM, moon777light said:

This question is especially for @Emerald and @mandyjw, i feel like you two are good in this area

 do you have any tips on how to integrate the feminine in a healthy manner? How do i start loving my feminine side?

I ordered the book "Women Who run with the Wolves" i heard its really good for fem aspect. Any other book recs? The booklist has only books good for male side haha

Adopt femininity. 

Its not rocket science. There's things that resonate. Before feminism, ideology, careerism,  don't need no man rhetoric. 

Forget books. Live. What do You want? What resonates? What gives you the big happy? 

I met lots of girls with pickup. Many followed the beaten path of chase degree in left handed puppetry, run up student debt,  high body count, and the list goes on. 

One friend had her son. She dropped out of school. Her hubby makes money. There's no diploma that will replace her time with her son. Moreover, there's other women feminists who will try to shame her for wanting to be traditional stay at home mom. She still doubles down on her conviction. 

Respect @her! 

[Meetjoeblack]

4 hours ago, mandyjw said:

It's mostly a matter of self judgement, having been raised in a culture that has very masculine (or rather goal driven) values, we may unconsciously judge ourselves or dismiss the importance of things we consider feminine. 

It's important to get in tune with your desires, notice what makes you happy and notice any judgmental thoughts you have around these things not being important or being silly. Anything self care related is a good place to start. For example it might seem silly to carefully decorate your room, or to pick a flower bring it in and put it in a vase. You may have trained yourself to deny the being and appreciation in simple things by asking yourself "what's the point" or feeling it's silly or a waste of time. Doing things simply for pleasure and not for any goal whatsoever is important. 

The funny thing is that these things aren't inherently feminine on closer inspection. It's about loving more fully loving and accepting who you are, who you chose to be. Buddha did a meditation on a single flower. Simple things are really not simple at all, there is great love in small things, it's only the mind that assumes otherwise. It is only us who feels the weight of importance or feels the shame of insignificance.

It's also really important to notice how you are preventing yourself from feeling or being vulnerable. Because we often feel vulnerable as women we prevent ourselves from feeling that way, and prevent ourselves from discovering the true strength and power that is actually there beneath that. In the end, it's all really just about self love.

There's a series of a Peterson vblogs on the topic. 

Woman marries partner at law firm. He makes partner. She hits late 20s, quits, and has a few kids. 

Peterson goes onto say, women prioritize other things. And they're right to do so he says. 

There's a lot of sheeple.  Society pedals degeneracy and people take it hook line and sinker. I saw a stat. Over a trillion of student debt belongs to women and its not for STEM. Furthermore, You can't declare bankruptcy on on it. 

 

[Treetalk]

Think about what you’re resisting because you think it’s too “girly”. 

Read the Heroine’s Journey by Maureen Murdock which gives a pretty good explanation of why women start to reject their femininity.

Teal Swan has made a video about the divine feminine, which gives an interesting perspective. 

 

[Emerald]

On 1/30/2020 at 11:00 AM, moon777light said:

This question is especially for @Emerald and @mandyjw, i feel like you two are good in this area

 do you have any tips on how to integrate the feminine in a healthy manner? How do i start loving my feminine side?

I ordered the book "Women Who run with the Wolves" i heard its really good for fem aspect. Any other book recs? The booklist has only books good for male side haha

It's a tall order to fill because society is largely unaware of what femininity is. And it tends to also look down upon things associated with it, consciously or unconsciously. Although, it is getting better.

So, it's a lot about breaking down those false notions about the feminine, and getting to know the feminine at a deeper level.

The process is mostly subtractive and about finding your natural feminine energy, though you can certainly accentuate what's there.

But it can help to see where your resistances and barriers are if you look at general traits within the feminine principle...

Here is a list of the feminine principle traits in relation to their complementary masculine traits...

• Darkness (as opposed to light)
• Being (as opposed to doing)
• Intuition (as opposed to logic)
• Emotions (as opposed to thought)
• Sensitivity (as opposed to impenetrability)
• Receptivity (as opposed to communication)
• Earthliness (as opposed to idealism)
• Grounding and stability (as opposed to flight)
• Instincts (as opposed to civilized behaviors)
• Sensuality (as opposed to pensiveness)
• Birth and Death (as opposed to eternal life)
• The moon (as opposed to the sun)
• The present moment (as opposed to past and future)
• The arational (as opposed to the rational)
• The body (as opposed to the mind)
• Attunement to natural cycles (as opposed to controlling nature)
• Compassion (as opposed to respect)
• Wisdom (as opposed to knowledge)
• Nature (as opposed to society)
• Laterality (as opposed to hierarchy)
• Cooperation (as opposed to competition)
• Interdependence (as opposed to independence)
• Care for the Earth and all the creatures that crawl upon it (as opposed to prioritizing human survival above all)
• The ability to feel energy in people and plants as a means of path-finding (as opposed to being guided by set principles)
• Nurturing (as opposed to protecting)
• Mystery (as opposed to clarity)
• Eroticism - aka life-giving (as opposed to catalyzing life)
• Holistic thinking (as opposed to linear thinking)
• The ability to hold space for opposites (as opposed to choosing one side)
• Yes and (as opposed to either or)
• Non-resistance (as opposed to resistance)
• Softness (as opposed to hardness)
• Beauty (as opposed to utility)
• Our animal nature (as opposed to our God-nature)
• Creativity (as opposed to productivity)
• Regenerative chaos and destruction (as opposed to order)
• Honor for the material and physical world (as opposed to mind over matter)
• Intimacy (as opposed to detachment)

Go through the list and see what triggers you or makes you feel a little smug. And you can find where your barriers may be.

 

 

 

[Emerald]

On 1/31/2020 at 5:27 PM, Meetjoeblack said:

Adopt femininity. 

Its not rocket science. There's things that resonate. Before feminism, ideology, careerism,  don't need no man rhetoric. 

Forget books. Live. What do You want? What resonates? What gives you the big happy? 

I met lots of girls with pickup. Many followed the beaten path of chase degree in left handed puppetry, run up student debt,  high body count, and the list goes on. 

One friend had her son. She dropped out of school. Her hubby makes money. There's no diploma that will replace her time with her son. Moreover, there's other women feminists who will try to shame her for wanting to be traditional stay at home mom. She still doubles down on her conviction. 

Respect @her! 

It's actually really difficult to integrate your feminine side as a woman (or man for that matter) in a world where the feminine has been repressed and seen as inferior for many thousands of years, and is just now coming to the surface to be reintegrated. 

Patriarchal society, creates a vacuum where almost no femininity beyond the most basic relational elements of it, can exist. It's only really been in the process of coming back online in the collective for the past 100 years or so since industrialization began. And we still have a long way to go.

So, the way to survive and thrive as a woman/girl in contemporary society without a substantial amount of ugliness coming your way is to repress the feminine and join in the reverence for the masculine and develop it in one's self. And development of the masculine side is good for everyone. Otherwise, the woman will never develop herself because she's unlikely to ever leave the small box of traditional feminine social constructs which bears very little resemblance to actual femininity in its full depth and breadth.

Society's definition of the feminine is very male-washed and limited as we are still a mostly patriarchal society. So, it is exceptionally difficult to recover your feminine side as a woman because femininity is often cast as a weakness by both men and women, and is often used as a way for men to tell women to get back in the old box. 

So, it can be a daunting task to get in touch with your feminine power when society is constantly telling you that only the masculine has power and is superior to the feminine. No one wants to be inferior or walked over. So, many women resist their feminine power because they have internalized the same misogyny that is cast all over society. And this is very difficult to unlearn.

But if these women got in touch with the divine feminine, most would find the heart of their power there and would embrace the feminine gladly. And it would change the world into a much more compassionate and emotionally intelligent place. Right now, it's so harsh because there is an extreme masculine imbalance and an intense fear of the feminine inherited from our patriarchal past trying to control Mother Nature that had so much power over us before the technology of the current day. We need the feminine to temper it.

So, point being, it's very tough to be in touch with your feminine power as a woman because of all the collective wounding associated with it.