How to deal with stage blue Shame and Guilt?

[ShugendoRa]

I was raised with Roman Catholic Family in LA so there not so strict but there shame and guilt they put on me is deep. I cant even be in the living room with my family without feeling some type of shame or guilt and there really good at doing it what do i  do? 

[mandyjw]

Meditation, self care, self love, then when you're on a role with those things and feel inspired to do so you can dig deep into the roots of the feelings, and examine the assumptions behind them. You can dig up memories and see through them and see how they built up a wall of avoidance. We think we are avoiding pain but what the wall is protecting us from is none other than love. 

We are the ones who protect ourselves because we believe that others can cause us to feel shame or unworthy. We have given them the power to make us feel this way, but that was never possible, it was a self created illusion. The power to feel any way resides within us. When you examine what the self really is and come to love it you understand the actual relationship between feelings, self and other. 

First be willing to let go of the relationship that you believe and have assumed. That's where meditation, self love, and self care come in.

[Nahm]

There were two birds on a wire, and both felt shame and guilt. 

There was one bird on a wire, and it never occurred to him to think on behalf of another.

[zeroISinfinity]

Thing is one bird gets in mood and 2nd bird will catch on.

Be the 1st bird. 

So much wisdom everywhere. Open your ❤️ more. Yeah guess I have to. So excited. 

Edited January 13, 2020 by zeroISinfinity

[Visionary]

Allowing, honoring, gratitude and loving. In that order.

It's a huge step to go from major resistance to loving. Emotional honesty is very important here. So whatever i'm typing here is not a "solution" to a "problem".  It's the whole process for the sake of the process. It's not result oriented. You honor the emotion because you have found the honor in yourself. You have gratitude for the emotion because of you have gratitude. Etc. Not because you want to achieve something. 

And the final touch is complete detachment: the realization that neither bad nor good exist. This should make you view the emotion as it is. The emotion love is also a way of attaching. This means complete vulnerability. There is no need to overcome the issues (as bad doesn't exist). There is no need for a positive emotion afterwards (as good doesn't exist).

So eventually it's working your way to realizing that nothing needs to be done. At all. Through love. 

 

[Aaron p]

@ShugendoRa the reason they are so hard on you is because deep down they are projecting their own faults on you. Deep deep down they are still sinners. That's why the have to try so hard to not give into the sinful deeds. Ask yourself, if my family was truly good and holy, why is it so important to them not give into their sinful desires. It's because their singular desires are still there. They are still sexual, lying, stealing people...they're just trying to be good. Now this is probably done from good intentions but it's still bullshit. 

If you can extend the most intimate love to each of your family members (individually) this will remove their heavy burdens. 

Matthew 11:28-30 MSG trans. “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

 

Religions are man's attempts to reach God, relationship is God reaching down to you. Allow God to unlock the sight of your spiritual eyes so you can interpret the scriptures correctly. 

Luke 24:45 "Jesus opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures that they knew."

Edited January 14, 2020 by Aaron p

[ShugendoRa]

I appreciate all of you 

[Rilles]

shit, i have the same feeling, whenever i return to my parents home its like i have to ”choke” or repress my own consciousness and interests lol,

it makes me so uncomfortable and nervous but you just have to deal with it. Face the fact that your mind has been programmed since you were a baby and you have to live and explore life eitherway.

[WelcometoReality]

@ShugendoRa It might help going to therapy to deal with the feelings of shame and guilt. Or you could write about them in a journal to become more conscious of them.

[Aaron p]

Smoke DMT lol