I don't know who I am

[GroovyGuru]

In a couple days I will be starting my final semester of college (I graduate in May). As the time approaches for me to put my degree into use and find a decent job, I've been thinking about my situation lately.

I really feel that I do not know who I am. I have absolutely no interest in the field I have been studying (finance) and a result I feel no motivation or ambition to actually starting my career in this area. I feel like I have just been living my life on autopilot the last couple years, just going through the motions of schoolwork, my part-time job, working out, dicking around with friends and the sort. I just have no idea where my life is going. I've been telling myself for years now to just sort of trust the process and that in time I will discover my greatest passion/purpose in life but I just don't know. 

I am a pretty productive person, I do very well in school and spend a lot of time reading, educating myself in various fields, exercising, playing music here and there etc but I don't know where any of this is taking me. I know I have potential to give something to the world, or at least do something that makes me happy and proud but I have no idea what that can be. I don't want to live a mediocre life working some corporate job where I'm treated like a slave. And it doesn't help that my parents are nagging me left and right about finding a job but I simply lack the motivation, it's not because I'm lazy but the idea of corporate status and a high salary just doesn't necessarily do it for me. 

I envy my younger brother who also does well in school but has a clear purpose and goal about his life: his band, which he commits so much time and energy into and it's really starting to pay off for him. 

My life is great, I really don't have anything to complain about in the grand scheme of things but it just feels so bland. There's nothing truly exciting me about life and I don't know what to do. I'm only 21, but I want to figure this out before it is too late. Perhaps I need to take the spiritual practices more seriously than I have been as of late.

[purerogue]

Look into meaning vs no meaning, after that find out why you do not need meaning, or no meaning  to live fully and be excited about things.

Looks like that might be  first thing you have to come in understanding with. 

[ajasatya]

The Universe doesn't know what it is. And that's why it is.

[Aaron p]

7 hours ago, GroovyGuru said:

Perhaps I need to take the spiritual practices more seriously than I have been as of late.

@GroovyGuru  

 

 

 

Edited January 12, 2020 by Aaron p