How To Find A Good Therapist

[Raptorsin7]

I want to get into therapy to work on unresolved trauma and my depression. Any tips on choosing a good therapist? Are there markers or signs of a good therapist in your experience?

Any other thoughts. Thank you.

[Red-White-Light]

@Raptorsin7 They're all good, just pick one and stick to them.

[Elisabeth]

Pick whomever you feel safe to talk to. My approach has been to go to the first session or two. If I feel anything wrong (i.e. the therapist is not smart enough to follow what I say, the therapist is judgemental, I plain and simply don't like that person), then I don't continue with this therapist. However, I trust people rather easily, so if you think you'll find a flaw about everyone, you may need to choose another approach.

[Raptorsin7]

@Elisabeth @Red-White-Light I'm very motivated to overcome my troubles so I might not have to be too picky here. As long as they help me grow and overcome my problems that will be enough.

How have you guys found therapy has helped you?

[Eph75]

I have been in therapy twice, first time I had no idea that I needed it and circumstances got me there - it was an eye-opener to something that I had never seen about myself. It was only two sessions but it was the start of unraveling myself. Life changing.

The second was at a phase where I had explored "all my known limitations" but I felt confused as there was "nothing left" but something wasn't right. I went on my own initiative and it made me expose myself to most rooted and to me "known unknown", blindspot and limitation. 

The second time around was about 5-6 sessions and on to of that 12 x 3h group sessions/training in emotional responses. Life changing. 

Somehow before these I thought of therapy as admitting failure and a weakness, something to be ashamed of - in truth it is a strength and power to know when it's time to get some guidence into rearranging what you know so that you get better chance to assemble the pieces of your life puzzle that you've already figured out - which adds clarity. 

The outcome of therapy I think fully depend on you doing the work, not then therapist, they just guide you forward and into reasoning that is a blindspot to you. 

Edited January 7, 2020 by Eph75

[Raptorsin7]

@Eph75 I'm very committed. I have been trying to improve myself mostly on my own, and with the forum. But I think I need to reach out and get more help. Thanks

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Raptorsin7

Try with anything, see how it goes.

Say to yourself, that your main goal is to say your problems out loud to somebody else, for someone to listen and give you his perspective and answers. And for him to ask you about details, when you yourself didn't see blindspots.

You know a lot about all of these psychological aspects of therapy, mind, ego, etc, it's probaly not something that therapist will give you anything valuable (like knowledge-wise), if you are on self-development journey for a longer period of time - at least from my experience.

But it's worth the try - finding even one blind spot in your thinking or discovering one thing about yourself can change your life forever.