Porn is essentially pointless.

[the-philogynist]

47 minutes ago, Consilience said:

Yes! Great analogy. 

Im sorry @the-philogynist I wasnt trying to insult your intelligence. 

No, terrible analogy.

Having natural sex is not a skill.

[Forestluv]

15 minutes ago, the-philogynist said:

Let me ask you something: tongue dexterity, tip of tongue vs flat edge, different pressures, usage of lips, labia or clitoris, motion style, rhythm, consistency vs variation, suction etc., do you have to go to a training school to known how to do those?

Of course not. I learned it through practice during hundreds of sexual sessions over many years. When I first started, I was very unskilled. After years of practice, I am now highly skilled. 

There have been books written to develop these skills, yet practice is essential. 

[the-philogynist]

45 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

You are missing out on a lot. You are referring to human sex as if it was dog sex in which an erect penis goes in and out of a vagina. Human sex is much much more than that. It’s not like hammering a nail into a walk.

You are unable to imagine what actual sex with another person is like. You would need to get the experience to discover what we are talking about. 

If it wasn't the penis inserting into the vagina it wouldn't be called having sex, now would it?

[Forestluv]

6 minutes ago, the-philogynist said:

If it wasn't the penis inserting into the vagina it wouldn't be called having sex, now would it?

You are missing a lot. Human sexuality goes way beyond what you are aware of. You don’t seem open to learning via discussion. Thus, I would recommend having actual sex with another person. It would be very mind expanding for you. 

Or, if you are happy with the story you’ve created and you don’t want sex - then great. Enjoy. 

[Consilience]

Of all the thought stories to be lost in ?

[Forestluv]

1 minute ago, Consilience said:

Of all the thought stories to be lost in ?

For sure. This is a bizarre one. I’ve never heard one quite like this before. 

[Shin]

1 minute ago, Serotoninluv said:

For sure. This is a bizarre one. I’ve never heard one quite like this before. 

You sure about that ?  

It's saddening sometimes, knowing some people will stay stuck their whole life in belief patterns like this

[Forestluv]

Just now, Shin said:

You sure about that ?  

I haven’t seen this particular story before (that sex involves no skill and is simply an act of inserting a penis into a vagina). 

[the-philogynist]

1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

You are missing out on a lot. You are referring to human sex as if it was dog sex in which an erect penis goes in and out of a vagina. Human sex is much much more than that. It’s not like hammering a nail into a walk.

You are unable to imagine what actual sex with another person is like. You would need to get the experience to discover what we are talking about. 

I can imagine having sex with a woman that's easy.

I don't need no 'experience' to know what sex is.

blockquote widget

[Forestluv]

1 minute ago, the-philogynist said:

I don't need no 'experience' to know what sex is.

If your story of sex is working for you, I am happy for you ❤️ ? 

[the-philogynist]

1 hour ago, Consilience said:

@the-philogynist I encourage you to be open to the possibility that sex requires practice to master, and there are skills within sex by which you practice achieving mastery. 

1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

 

1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

 

You know what, that's probably why problem people think that porn is so different than off camera sex.

We make this stuff so complicated when it doesn't have to be.

We can have sex just like what they're doing on camera.

What we need to have is sexual confidence instead of trying to have so call 'skills'.

 

P.s. the format on this site is confusing. How do you get rid of other users quotes in the reply?

[the-philogynist]

52 minutes ago, Shin said:

That's the physical part, you can be perfect at this and still not know how to have great sex.

Great sex is about the psychological part, and that needs two pretty well developed human being ?

 

I agree great sex is about the psychological part and that's kind of the point I was trying to get at.

We don't need to be worrying about so called skills.

When a person has sexual confidence they're going be creative.

[the-philogynist]

51 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

@the-philogynist You are not aware of what you are missing. I’m not sure why you have created a story that is so far off the mark. It has a couple similarities to the story I was given in a fundamental Catholic environment. 

I suppose if it gives you comfort it may serve a purpose. Yet if you want to become sexually active and good at sex, this story in your head is like chans that will hold you back. 

What story?

And what's off the mark?

[the-philogynist]

49 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

Of course not. I learned it through practice during hundreds of sexual sessions over many years. When I first started, I was very unskilled. After years of practice, I am now highly skilled. 

There have been books written to develop these skills, yet practice is essential. 

Was it that you were 'unskilled'?

Or was it just that you didn't have 'sexual confidence'?

Edited December 25, 2019 by the-philogynist

[the-philogynist]

46 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

You are missing a lot. Human sexuality goes way beyond what you are aware of. You don’t seem open to learning via discussion. Thus, I would recommend having actual sex with another person. It would be very mind expanding for you. 

Or, if you are happy with the story you’ve created and you don’t want sex - then great. Enjoy. 

Don't recommend anything.

I already know what sex is and I plan on actually having sex when I am married. 

Human sexuality is a unique thing but you're making it more complicated than it need to be.

[Forestluv]

24 minutes ago, the-philogynist said:

Was it that you were 'unskilled'?

Or was it just that you didn't have 'sexual confidence'?

You are conflating confidence and skills. 

Fir example, I’ve never golfed before, yet I’ve watched a lot on TV. To me, it looks pretty simple. You just hit the ball toward the hole. Yet even if my confidence level was sky high, I would still not be able to shoot under par because I do not have the skills. 

Being under-confident or over-confident both cause problems when trying to develop skills. 

Skills are only one aspect of sex. There are many other aspects. For example, being genuine is a good trait. Also being adept at listening and responding to her cues during sex is a good trait - yet I would consider this a skill that develops over time. It is a different form of communication. 

There is no way to fake being good at oral sex - regardless of confidence level. That is like a beginning language learner with a lot of confidence. It will still be totally obvious they are a beginner. When I was younger, guys had the “alphabet method” to try and fake their way through oral sex. Yet once someone reaches intermediate stages, the method is a joke. 

It takes time and practice to develop skilled oral technique. Yet most guys don’t care about that. They are more interested in cutting to the chase and busting a nut. 

Having confidence is just one component. Curiosity, desire and willingness to improve are also really important. To me, it sounds like sex isn’t much more than a few pumps and a squirt for you. That’s fine, yet you would be missing out on a lot. 

As well, skill is only one component. If there is no chemistry and a woman feels uncomfortable, sexual skills will not compensate. Chemistry, connection and mutual trust are important components. 

[the-philogynist]

1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

For sure. This is a bizarre one. I’ve never heard one quite like this before. 

How is it bizarre?

Maybe you're the one not thinking outside the box.

[the-philogynist]

1 hour ago, Shin said:

You sure about that ?  

It's saddening sometimes, knowing some people will stay stuck their whole life in belief patterns like this

How is it saddening?

I'm thinking outside of the box.

How about you?

[the-philogynist]

16 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

You are conflating confidence and skills. 

Fir example, I’ve never golfed before, yet I’ve watched a lot on TV. To me, it looks pretty simple. You just hit the ball toward the hole. Yet even if my confidence level was sky high, I would still not be able to shoot under par because I do not have the skills. 

Being under-confident or over-confident both cause problems when trying to develop skills. 

Skills are only one aspect of sex. There are many other aspects. For example, being genuine is a good trait. Also being adept at listening and responding to her cues during sex is a good trait - yet I would consider this a skill that develops over time. It is a different form of communication. 

There is no way to fake being good at oral sex - regardless of confidence level. That is like a beginning language learner with a lot of confidence. It will still be totally obvious they are a beginner. When I was younger, guys had the “alphabet method” to try and fake their way through oral sex. Yet once someone reaches intermediate stages, the method is a joke. 

It takes time and practice to develop skilled oral technique. Yet most guys don’t care about that. They are more interested in cutting to the chase and busting a nut. 

Having confidence is just one component. Curiosity, desire and willingness to improve are also really important. To me, it sounds like sex isn’t much more than a few pumps and a squirt for you. That’s fine, yet you would be missing out on a lot. 

What's really bizarre to me is that some people would think that natural copulation involves some type of skill that you have you have to learn.

I think that's that's the problem of this whole issue of porn. You think what the people in the film does is so amazing when people at home can do the same thing especially if they have confidence.

Just why are you all saying having natural copulating sex takes having skills that you have to learn?

 

[JunkyJu]

Sometimes porn is better than real sex.  It has its pros and cons.  Just because you are having sex with another human doesn’t necessarily make it the most enjoyable. *yawn