Girlfriend to Friend

[WaterDroplet--00]

Hey guys, so here's the situation: I've been dating this girl for over a year now and were going very strong, there is a consistent improvement in both relationship depth/connection and growth as time goes on.  We're very happy with the situation and all is well. However, considering we are going into year 12 of high school now it means that our time is limited. She is going to University 10 hours away from mine and we have both agreed that long distance in not for us. So basically we're planning to break it off and date other people and all that for the 4-5 years at University, making sure to stay in contact and stay friends. This is all good i'm okay with this as i think it's important to date many people but the only problem is that our relationship i feel does not posses the robust structure to sustain a friendship requiring this level of effort. Our relationship at this point is mainly very romantic and sexually energetic, which is absolutely beautiful but we really need to be developing our friendship structure simultaneously.   

Which leads me to the main reason why i'm posting this. I really don't know how i am practically going to develop this friendship while still maintaining this romantic side of our relationship as well. I'm really just looking for tangible examples of how i might go about this if anyone has any good ideas or resources that might help. Like how can i develop the right mindset to practice developing a deeper friendship with my cute girl. 

What do ya'll think? muah!!     

[Leo Gura]

What is the point of building a deep relationship if you two are already agreed that it will end within months?

Don't kid yourself. What will realistically happen is that as soon as she or you hook up with your next partner, you will forget all about her and there will be no friendship left at all, since the function that this person served in your life will be gone.

Don't forget that relationships are functional, transactional exchanges. If the function is lost, the relationship will fall away. The relationship must serve both of you in some significant way. Once you hook up with someone else, this old relationship will actually become a potential threat to the new thing you got going.

I would not waste too much time trying to maintain this thing if you are already clear it will not last. You are young and in university you will encounter a thousand other girls into whom you can invest your energy. Likewise on her end. She will almost certainly forget about you once she hooks up with her next guy.

[Nahm]

@WaterDroplet--00

There is nothing you need do. It is the potential doing, what could be added, which stands to thwart. In understanding you are both already entirely free, unattached, with no obligation to each other whatsoever - you are readily friends & lovers. An ounce of possession in the mind spoils. Your interest in her will naturally deepen, without needing to be understood, with out attachment.

[WaterDroplet--00]

@Leo Gura Yeah I suppose that's a fair point. It's really nice and kind of brutal to hear it like that but also I can see that the idea of maintaining the relationship through such forced circumstances might be getting a little idealistic in this scenario. It might help to put everything (life) into perspective a little more. thankyou. :)) 

[WaterDroplet--00]

@Nahm That's actually beautiful I appreciate that a lot. Hehehe