I wish I would be happy in love

[Fede83]

I wish I would have a girlfriend,I wish I can one day be happy in love with a girl,I wish one day this is gonna Happen again..but yet it seems so distant..i trying to focus on my self and to keep going..I’m full of love and I wanna donate this to another soul and connect with her..there is something wrong on this ?

Much love to everyone ❤️❤️

Edited December 5, 2019 by Fede83

[Raptorsin7]

Yes, there is something wrong with this. I think once you are genuinely happy and satisfied with life and are completely ok with never having a girlfriend even if you die alone, then you will be ready for a girlfriend. But i'm not sure. I've never had a girlfriend lol.

[Fede83]

20 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Yes, there is something wrong with this. I think once you are genuinely happy and satisfied with life and are completely ok with never having a girlfriend even if you die alone, then you will be ready for a girlfriend. But i'm not sure. I've never had a girlfriend lol.

I hope one day u will have one! U deserve it ❤️ U think this is the way of thinking ? Be completely free and happy alone ?

[Raptorsin7]

@Fede83 Lol thanks, i think i deserve one too (:

Yes, we must be completely free. If you go into a relationship expecting the other person to complete you or fill the holes, the relationship will be a disaster. If you are both complete, then the love and the relationship will be easy. 

If you could choose one or the other what would you choose?

Complete happiness and freedom with or without your partner? Or dependence on them to make you happy?

[Nickyy]

35 minutes ago, Fede83 said:

I wish I would have a girlfriend,I wish I can one day be happy in love with a girl which I will be happy too,I wish one day this is gonna Happen again..but yet it seems so distant..i trying to focus on my self and to keep going..I’m full of love and I wanna donate this to another soul and connect with her..there is something wrong on this ?

Much love to everyone ❤️❤️

There is absolutely everything right with it 

You can have a goal, just don't live in the future.

Does that make sense?

You can aim for things your heart desires, but you can also be happy now with what you have got.

[DrewNows]

focusing on the lack even subconsciously, can keep it at a distance 

if you can dream it, you’ve lived it! 

start dreaming, yes even day dream, play around with the person you see yourself as with a girl friend, and finally focus on the feeling (of being this you who feels absolutely complete)

Now bring the same vibration to your physical experience (every action and interaction) 
 

 

[Preety_India]

 

You got some fantastic responses here. I believe in the law of attraction although I know that some people think that it's nonsense. You attract the situation with your energy. 

Do not live in LACK

It's detrimental to self esteem if you constantly focus on it. Because it makes you feel deprived. This can unconsciously attract toxic relationships without your awareness. 

A relationship is a big deal. So even if you get a gf, it's not all smooth sailing. There will be challenges in such a way that sometimes you might want to be alone. Fights are common.. 

But obviously a relationship makes you feel wanted, desired, grounded, nurtured and attached. It makes you feel secure  

The one thing that you can focus in the meanwhile is personal growth. Think how this will attract your future partner. Think how much work you did on yourself to attract this future person.. It will make you feel proud of who you are. 

But do not wallow in self pity. Understand that you deserve love whether you get a gf or not. Which means you will need to engage in self love.. 

Every mental need is deep down a craving of the mind. And when it gets fulfilled its not a big deal.. Because you kinda get over it and it is not as great as you thought once. 

Another option to feel affection in your life is to adopt a pet. Animals are naturally intuitive and loving and they can make you feel loved if you feel lonely. You can learn so much from them. Of course human company is an entirely different thing. 

But whether there is a will there is a way. So be hopeful and positive. Always learn finding love in yourself is also a journey which is equally exciting. 

And try to connect to people. Do not lose your romanticism just because you don't have a partner. Read romantic novels. Watch emotional movies. Watch comedy. Connect to that side in you so you always have that ESSENCE even if you don't have that PRESENCE. 

Like someone said here that you can always dream and live in those dreams and still manifest your desires in those dreams.. 

So never stop dreaming and always work on yourself and have an open heart. 

[Forestluv]

@Fede83 There is something special about an innocent, pure desire to share romantic love with another. ♥️

[Shin]

If you were truly filled with love, having a girlfriend or not would make no difference at all.

You can share love in an infinite number of ways.

Just smiling to strangers, helping people whenever you see someone needing help, listening genuinely without judgments, working hard at your life purpose, and even just looking people in the eyes or living their life.

You are totally satisfied if you are filled with love, because it's your natural state.

Believe it or not, you're not filled with love right now, it's neediness and neurotic attachment.

You have been brainwashed by society and now thinks you absolutely need a girlfriend to be happy, to allow yourself to feel love.

That's absurd, no one can give you love, it's already in you, you just subconsciously says «I need that and this, THEN I will feel love».

Then it becomes your reality.

This isn't some hocus pocus concept, it's true lol

I wish you could feel it, then this idea of a girlfriend will seem silly to you ?

Edited December 5, 2019 by Shin

[Nickyy]

43 minutes ago, Shin said:

If you were truly filled with love, having a girlfriend or not would make no difference at all.

You can share love in an infinite number of ways.

Just smiling to strangers, helping people whenever you see someone needing help, listening genuinely without judgments, working hard at your life purpose, and even just looking people in the eyes or living their life.

You are totally satisfied if you are filled with love, because it's your natural state.

Believe it or not, you're not filled with love right now, it's neediness and neurotic attachment.

You have been brainwashed by society and now thinks you absolutely need a girlfriend to be happy, to allow yourself to feel love.

That's absurd, no one can give you love, it's already in you, you just subconsciously says «I need that and this, THEN I will feel love».

Then it becomes your reality.

This isn't some hocus pocus concept, it's true lol

I wish you could feel it, then this idea of a girlfriend will seem silly to you ?

I didn't see him say that getting a girlfriend would make him happy. I just saw this

9 hours ago, Fede83 said:

I wish I would have a girlfriend,I wish I can one day be happy in love with a girl which I will be happy too

?

[Fede83]

9 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

@Fede83 Lol thanks, i think i deserve one too (:

Yes, we must be completely free. If you go into a relationship expecting the other person to complete you or fill the holes, the relationship will be a disaster. If you are both complete, then the love and the relationship will be easy. 

If you could choose one or the other what would you choose?

Complete happiness and freedom with or without your partner? Or dependence on them to make you happy?

First one hands down

 

9 hours ago, Nickyy said:

There is absolutely everything right with it 

You can have a goal, just don't live in the future.

Does that make sense?

You can aim for things your heart desires, but you can also be happy now with what you have got.

Ye totally i need to start appreciate more my life for sure ❤️

 

9 hours ago, DrewNows said:

focusing on the lack even subconsciously, can keep it at a distance 

if you can dream it, you’ve lived it! 

start dreaming, yes even day dream, play around with the person you see yourself as with a girl friend, and finally focus on the feeling (of being this you who feels absolutely complete)

Now bring the same vibration to your physical experience (every action and interaction) 
 

 

Loa is magnificent ❤️

 

9 hours ago, Preety_India said:

 

You got some fantastic responses here. I believe in the law of attraction although I know that some people think that it's nonsense. You attract the situation with your energy. 

Do not live in LACK

It's detrimental to self esteem if you constantly focus on it. Because it makes you feel deprived. This can unconsciously attract toxic relationships without your awareness. 

A relationship is a big deal. So even if you get a gf, it's not all smooth sailing. There will be challenges in such a way that sometimes you might want to be alone. Fights are common.. 

But obviously a relationship makes you feel wanted, desired, grounded, nurtured and attached. It makes you feel secure  

The one thing that you can focus in the meanwhile is personal growth. Think how this will attract your future partner. Think how much work you did on yourself to attract this future person.. It will make you feel proud of who you are. 

But do not wallow in self pity. Understand that you deserve love whether you get a gf or not. Which means you will need to engage in self love.. 

Every mental need is deep down a craving of the mind. And when it gets fulfilled its not a big deal.. Because you kinda get over it and it is not as great as you thought once. 

Another option to feel affection in your life is to adopt a pet. Animals are naturally intuitive and loving and they can make you feel loved if you feel lonely. You can learn so much from them. Of course human company is an entirely different thing. 

But whether there is a will there is a way. So be hopeful and positive. Always learn finding love in yourself is also a journey which is equally exciting. 

And try to connect to people. Do not lose your romanticism just because you don't have a partner. Read romantic novels. Watch emotional movies. Watch comedy. Connect to that side in you so you always have that ESSENCE even if you don't have that PRESENCE. 

Like someone said here that you can always dream and live in those dreams and still manifest your desires in those dreams.. 

So never stop dreaming and always work on yourself and have an open heart. 

I know I can show up as a man who’s craving and begging for a relationship but ideally I’m not like this just sometime I feel this deep urge after some tough day ❤️

 

8 hours ago, Serotoninluv said:

@Fede83 There is something special about an innocent, pure desire to share romantic love with another. ♥️

❤️❤️

 

1 hour ago, Shin said:

If you were truly filled with love, having a girlfriend or not would make no difference at all.

You can share love in an infinite number of ways.

Just smiling to strangers, helping people whenever you see someone needing help, listening genuinely without judgments, working hard at your life purpose, and even just looking people in the eyes or living their life.

You are totally satisfied if you are filled with love, because it's your natural state.

Believe it or not, you're not filled with love right now, it's neediness and neurotic attachment.

You have been brainwashed by society and now thinks you absolutely need a girlfriend to be happy, to allow yourself to feel love.

That's absurd, no one can give you love, it's already in you, you just subconsciously says «I need that and this, THEN I will feel love».

Then it becomes your reality.

This isn't some hocus pocus concept, it's true lol

I wish you could feel it, then this idea of a girlfriend will seem silly to you ?

Is just a moment I got yesterday  was in a romantic mood but ye I do feel sometime this is counterproductive especially when neediness show up it doesn’t help in any way at all but we keep working and trust the process ❤️

 

1 hour ago, Nickyy said:

I didn't see him say that getting a girlfriend would make him happy. I just saw this

?

I expressed my sentence wrong here,I’m already happy now girlfriend or not ❤️ I will edit my post  

[bejapuskas]

10 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Yes, there is something wrong with this. I think once you are genuinely happy and satisfied with life and are completely ok with never having a girlfriend even if you die alone, then you will be ready for a girlfriend. But i'm not sure. I've never had a girlfriend lol.

Be careful about preaching the preach

[Shin]

1 hour ago, Nickyy said:

I didn't see him say that getting a girlfriend would make him happy. I just saw this

?

Actually that's what he's saying, just not directly.

Wanting so much to love someone else means he can't feel love right now, or that he can't already give love right now (which is the same).

There is no difference when you love if you give it to a stranger in the street or your intimate partner, you feel exactly the same,

If it's love, and not attachment.

And attachment is a joke compared to love ?

[Fede83]

10 minutes ago, Shin said:

Actually that's what he's saying, just not directly.

Wanting so much to love someone else means he can't feel love right now, or that he can't already give love right now (which is the same).

There is no difference when you love if you give it to a stranger in the street or your intimate partner, you feel exactly the same,

If it's love, and not attachment.

And attachment is a joke compared to love ?

Why do u jump to this conclusion? I can love my self in the same way and meanwhile looking for sharing my love with another soul  ?  

[28 cm unbuffed]

so - how do I handle this problem: 

improving my emotional mastery, meeting more women, becoming better with attracting women and fucking in general

and at the same time not be needy for relationship and working on myself / self-love

like - practical advices

(let's say i got the second part handled)

Edited December 5, 2019 by 28 cm unbuffed

[Nickyy]

1 hour ago, Shin said:

Actually that's what he's saying, just not directly.

Wanting so much to love someone else means he can't feel love right now, or that he can't already give love right now (which is the same).

There is no difference when you love if you give it to a stranger in the street or your intimate partner, you feel exactly the same,

If it's love, and not attachment.

And attachment is a joke compared to love ?

But there is different types of love. I know what you're saying tho, you're talking about divine love. But wanting romantic love for the stage fede is at is appropriate for him right now. It's healthy in this context. But you're right, he's also right, it's just that both your views are partial and looking at the same thing from different angles (levels of development).

Now if fede was desperately needy that he cannot function without attention then that would be an unhealthy expression of his stage, where some shadow issue is bothering him that needs to be addressed. But that's not the case with fed, he feels pretty healthy to me. 

[Nickyy]

@Fede83

English is not your first language. Yes I know you're happy, you're doing ok from my point of view. You got rejected a couple of weeks back but you posted a beautiful post expressing your appreciation for women. That's very healthy. You didn't blame, play the victim, suppress anything, or get hostile. You may have been feeling bad, but you mastered that and your appreciation for the women in the world came through as a result of applying what you have learned doing self development. 

Edited December 5, 2019 by Nickyy

[bejapuskas]

Even having the perfect date with the girl of your dreams on your birthday is a joke compared to Divine Love

[bejapuskas]

I mean, not that it's not beautiful, but it still produces suffering... I just realized how cold this sounds  

[Nickyy]

29 minutes ago, bejapuskas said:

Even having the perfect date with the girl of your dreams on your birthday is a joke compared to Divine Love

Yes, pleasure / pain duality. Transcending that is divine love