Patients, Big Picture & Struggle (loneliness)

[Spiral Wizard]

I am relatively young for self-actualization & entrepreneurship. No one in my personal reach (or environment) is as far developed as I am, which is why I feel disconnected and often times lonely. 
 

There are these rare glances or sometimes even hours where I am so connected to my vision and the big / overarching picture. 

In these moments I know exactly why I put so much work into personal development and my business, in these moments it is crystal clear why I sacrifice for / invest in my future. 

Basically: In these situations I feel like everything is going perfect, there is no need to worry and the one year I have invested into my business is not that long.

But because I haven’t gotten the results I desire so much and because I fell short of many of my goals I get discouraged or depressed the next day.

What is your advice?

How are you staying connected to your vision?

How are you handling loneliness along your journey?

How are you staying patient?

How are you getting this big picture view consistently?

[undeather]

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I am relatively young for self-actualization & entrepreneurship. No one in my personal reach (or environment) is as far developed as I am, which is why I feel disconnected and often times lonely. 

This sounds like a bullshit story you tell yourself.
Most people who describe themselfe as "lonely" in this community are just really terrible at relating with other human beings. They build an ego around their ill perceived superiority and cant see that the real problem is general weirdness or some psychological projection they suffer from. Even if you are "more developed", then it should be easy for you to find friends on your level, in abundance. 

I have friends on every possible spectrum of conciousness and I can relate to them just fine. Of course, most of my closest friends are high value, high profile individuals but that doesnt mean I cant go out and do stuff with my stage blue cousin and enjoy it. 

 

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There are these rare glances or sometimes even hours where I am so connected to my vision and the big / overarching picture. 

In these moments I know exactly why I put so much work into personal development and my business, in these moments it is crystal clear why I sacrifice for / invest in my future. 

Basically: In these situations I feel like everything is going perfect, there is no need to worry and the one year I have invested into my business is not that long.

But because I haven’t gotten the results I desire so much and because I fell short of many of my goals I get discouraged or depressed the next day.

 

There is different advice for different developmental stages when it comes to this.

For some people this means dropping every expectation and that will do the trick.
For others, some good old discipline and persistance is the right track.
Some mindset switch is propably the best for the next one. 

You need to find that out for yourself, nobody in here can tell you that. 

The best advice I can give you is to find a mentor that has the success you are looking for. Asking such questions here on this board will confuse you even more, trust me. 
 

[Spiral Wizard]

20 hours ago, undeather said:

This sounds like a bullshit story you tell yourself.

First thing first, I love this answer, I needed that. I also appreciate your detailed answer!

Your abundance argument seems legit, I haven’t really considered that. But I personally never really had a problem with weirdness, I actually had a nice social life. But nowadays I am just not interested in low consciousness friends, I see no “value” or joy in spending time with them, I definitely prefer a podcast, working or high consciousness friends. I am trying to figure out why I am not capable of enjoying everyone’s company.
 

Do you have an idea?

21 hours ago, undeather said:

There is different advice for different developmental stages when it comes to this.

For some people this means dropping every expectation and that will do the trick.
For others, some good old discipline and persistance is the right track.
Some mindset switch is propably the best for the next one. 

What do you mean with “some mindset switch is probably the best for the next one.”?

 

I consider myself as an individual who

• has orange attachments, 
• has some healthy green parts, but isn’t hippie &
• loves / is passionate about yellow (is interested in turquoise)

I guess I am not ready for the no expectation approach. 
Currently I am trying the discipline track, I think it is working for me but I don’t feel completely comfortable with it, because I associate spiral dynamics stage orange with it, which I currently resist. (I struggle with letting that resistance go, any advice?) 

 

Is there another track which fits stage yellow or a track which you can imagine is worth looking into? 

 

[Spiral Wizard]

21 hours ago, undeather said:

The best advice I can give you is to find a mentor that has the success you are looking for. Asking such questions here on this board will confuse you even more, trust me. 
 

I haven’t found such a mentor yet. 
That’s good on the one hand because I will grow more if I figure it out myself but on the other hand it is devastating because I haven’t found someone who is stage turquoise or nearly as developed as Leo (which is my stage yellow goal) and lives a lifestyle like Jay Alverrez (stage orange goal, I guess). Sometimes, I know it is even “worst” / low conscious, I crave the Dan Bilzerian lifestyle.

Having orange and yellow motivations is tarring me apart...

Any Advice?!

Edited November 29, 2019 by Spiral Wizard

[Rigel]

Loneliness isn't a real thing you only think that. Being with people and being alone is no different. 

[undeather]

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I am trying to figure out why I am not capable of enjoying everyone’s company.
 

Do you have an idea?

 

Well, I cant really answer that for you. You gotta be open minded and ask yourself that question everyday. 
Do you enjoy NO ONES company or is it certain people? 

If you can enjoy time with a certain personaltiy type, then I would go out and look for exactly that type of person. You dont need a lot of friends, 2-3 high quality and relatable people in your circle is more than enough. On the other side, maybe you are just a judgemental douchebag who cant enjoy the simple things in people because of some "high conciousness ego-structure" he build for himself. Both is possible, but I just dont know you good enough to tell  So be honest and find that out for yourself. 

 

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Is there another track which fits stage yellow or a track which you can imagine is worth looking into? 

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I haven’t found such a mentor yet. 
That’s good on the one hand because I will grow more if I figure it out myself but on the other hand it is devastating because I haven’t found someone who is stage turquoise or nearly as developed as Leo (which is my stage yellow goal) and lives a lifestyle like Jay Alverrez (stage orange goal, I guess). Sometimes, I know it is even “worst” / low conscious, I crave the Dan Bilzerian lifestyle.

Having orange and yellow motivations is tarring me apart...

Any Advice?!

 

First of all, forget spiral dynamics.
Not that it hasnt an important place, but it typically leads people to stagnation by overanalysis. 
Its a great map if you want to look at genereal developmental tendencies, but it has its limits. 
I know some people who rely too much on this one map, and those are usually lost in trying to solve their world from the perspective of a whiteboard. I also notice time and time again that its misunderstood because of its integral nature. 

You want to grow your business if I am right. 
So forget about everything non related to that. This is not about spiral dynmaics, spiritualy, higher conciousness, non-duality.
You seem to be very young, so take one step after another and stop with all that other stuff for now. That whole second tier, stage yellow/turqoise headache will come to you anyway sooner or later. Look for a mentor that helps you with your business and your motivational problems. Maybe you need to go through multiple mentors to find one that fits your unique personal type. There are great integral teachers out there, you just need to find them. Dont try to find the "perfect" one, like the one you described - cause thats bullshit. Just use some your common sense a bit more. 

You wont grow more if you figure it out for yourself. Thats a bullshit story your ego tells you. Chances are you will never find it out and dabble in the dark for some years. You are clearly very young, so avoid a decade of trial and error, literally wasting your time, and find someone that helps you. Thats perfectly fine and the one smart thing to do. Nobody in here knows your exact situation, so why bother asking some randoms for advice? Most people here are not in a good place to start with, so it quickly becomes a blind leading the blind situation. Get some real help from real people or programs. 

Also Jay Alvarrez is not stage orange (kinda green/yellowish - there is some system thinking in him). You can be an enlightened stage turqoise master who drives Mercedes G-class while fucking a russian supermodel in the backseat. Its an integral model, so you transcend a stage by integrating the healthy parts of it. I am a typical "stage yellow" person, even if I dont like to identify as that. I drink alcohol, I make 6 figures, I have multiple sexual partners - so what? Stop labeling so much. You can be a stage yellow billionare (Elon Musk is high green/yellow) or a orange billionare (Jeff Bezos). You can be a stage yellow pickup artist (Marshall from Natural lifestyles) or some stage red mysoginistic idiot. There is no either/or. 

Anyway, stop with that analysis now. What you need to do know is taking care other stuff. 

Greetings
 

[undeather]

1 hour ago, Rigel said:

Loneliness isn't a real thing you only think that. Being with people and being alone is no different. 

Technically, depression isnt a real thing either, because godhead cant become depressed. 
Technically, when a dear friend dies, you shouldnt be sad. 
Technically your urge of taking a shit is an illusion. 

We can talk all day about the implications of non-duality, yet this changes nothing for 99,99999% who life on this planet and are currently not, nor will they ever be anywhere close to enlightenment. Even enlightened masters have this monkey-meatsuit and can experience lonliness. If you disagree, try not taking a shit for some days.

So, duh. 

Edited November 29, 2019 by undeather

[Spiral Wizard]

1 hour ago, undeather said:

You can be an enlightened stage turqoise master who drives Mercedes G-class while fucking a russian supermodel in the backseat.

lmfao

I instantly had to think of TheUnfits (Jay Alverrez friend).

 

Anyways, thank you @undeather I truly appreciate that you took the time to answer this in detail! 
Keep it up!

 

PS.: This may be projection, but I bet you are an ENTJ or something like that.

[undeather]

26 minutes ago, Spiral Wizard said:

lmfao

I instantly had to think of TheUnfits (Jay Alverrez friend).

 

Anyways, thank you @undeather I truly appreciate that you took the time to answer this in detail! 
Keep it up!

 

PS.: This may be projection, but I bet you are an ENTJ or something like that.

Glad I could help. Dont hesitate to shoot me a pm if you have any questions.
I am not very active but I will do my best to respond.

I follow both Jay AND Unfits on instagram  (Even though I think that Unfits is kinda dumb sometimes when he speeds with his Ferrari and endangers other human beigns unnecessarily)
They are both fun to watch and a great source of good music hehe. 

 

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PS.: This may be projection, but I bet you are an ENTJ or something like that.

Maybe! 

Edited November 29, 2019 by undeather

[Rigel]

@undeather You can very well get to a point where you are as confortable alone as you are with other people without enlightenment. Just acknowledging that ego of yours and taking ownership of it goes a long way.